Well, you don't need someone to tell you that something is definitely not right, because you've figured that out for yourself, in painful fashion! =0( I'm sorry you've gone two weeks without a reply. I hope things have gotten at least a little better since you posted.

I have a crown, as well (metal, covered in porcelain). Mine goes right up to the gum and maybe even a little into. On the inside of my mouth, I can see a tiny line of the metal, but that's all; it is just as close as a regular tooth. It didn't hurt when it was fit and the area was tender to touch for only about a day and tender when biting for about a week. After that (and since) I've been using it as a regular tooth with no issues. Your situation definitely does not sound normal, to me (but I'm only speaking from a patient experience).

I think the first thing you should do is get a second opinion from a new dentist as soon as possible. It's obvious that you're in severe pain and it doesn't sound like your current dentist is addressing your concerns. Stating that you hate them sounds like they've definitely lost your trust and I don't think you should put your dental health in the care of someone you don't trust, anymore.

If I were you, I'd scour my insurance list and find another dentist that could see me as soon as humanly possible. Don't stop with the first one if they can't see you ASAP; keep plugging through the list until one of them understands it's an emergency and sees you (most dentists will fit you in, I think, if you explain how bad this has been for you and how anxious you are for some relief).

As soon as you make the appointment, call your old dentist and request that they fax your records immediately for an emergency dental appointment. If you can, see if the new office will do it for you (that way you can avoid talking to the old office at all).

When talking with the new dentist, give them as much background as you can and try to make sure you explain where the pain is as well as you can and also mention that you didn't feel your previous dentist was addressing your pain. This should be a no brainer! Normal = no pain. You're in pain! Obviously, something is not o.k.!

I really hope this is useless advice because you've either done this, already, or you're feeling better. Drop in and let us know! And, if you haven't, see someone! Soon!