Depression Forum - depressed and need to talk

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Q: depressed and need to talk

asked by: jaitee on January 16th, 2008

New User

hi, im 19, and lately its been very well, i dont want to live anymore. i dont understand why, i have too many things going on, my parents are deceased, and i really have no one to go to, my family is/are not supportive, i sometimes just dont know what to do, i work, i go to college, and i cant seem to pay my bills, i sometimes wonder where i would live, if i couldnt pay my bills. my friends i no longer even see anymore, because all i ever do now, is stay in my apartment by myself all the time. everytime i go over to my sisters house, she is always telling me about how bad of a job i am doing, and how i dont care about anything. i am trying very hard, and it seems like i can never please anyone, i am always broke, i try to save money, but i am already behind on bills, as i live on my own. i just dont know what to do, my oldest sister, said she would help me buy a new car, if i can save some money. i am really stressed and depressed, i need a new car badly, the one i am driving is not safe at all, i even try to tell her that i dont know how i am going to be able to save money. so i go over to my younger sisters house today, and he starts yelling at me about how i am not trying hard enough to save money, i keep telling her i am trying my best to save money but it is very hard to, she seems to not know anything about me, she is a home mom, who has never worked in her life before, sometimes i just feel like she needs more help then i do

i just dont know what to do, i have thought about how things would be like if i wasnt alive, i dont think i would do something like that, but its the thoughts that keeps haunting my mind. i know living on my own since i was 18 can be very hard, i have been on my own for almost 2 years now. i have to learn things the hard way, because i dont have parents to tell me things like, for instance that my car needs a inspection each year. after getting a ticket, i learn. i hate my life, why cant it just be normal, i grew up with no parents, i move every other few months, i never had steady friends, i didnt have a normal life. i feel like i have missed out soo much on life. i am trying so hard, and it seems like im am heading no where, its almost pointless for me to keep trying, atleast that is how it feels. i dont think i can keep living like this much longer

Replies(4)

Fighter_in_the_Sky_

replied on January 16th, 2008

Experienced User

Dude, that must suck. You grew up w/o ur parents? Gosh, my parents just never really liked me and werent' real parent figures. You've never had steady friends? I haven't really either, but its not as bad 4 me cuz I dont move around all the time, its more like I cant really connect w/ all the rich, upper-class kids around where I live. Ur sister doesn't appreciate how hard you try? Gosh, that must suck. Ppl dont appreciate me very much either, my classmates, my swim coach, my sister, my teachers, etc. Dude, here's my advice, seriously, see a counselor. Even if the counselor can't become ur steady friend, u can at least have some one to talk to, and u seriously need to let all those feelings of urs out. And also, try for what u want until ur last breath cuz seriously, sometimes miracles can happen. Lookin back, if i didnt believe in the possibility of a miracle, I probably wouldnt be here today. Hope this helps, and hopefully my post made this post one of the popular posts on the front page and more ppl comment on it, lol

gingerelizabeth

replied on January 16th, 2008

Experienced User

hey!
it sounds like you are extremely busy. and i dont blame you for feeling alone.
what helps me when i see no way out is knowing that im not the only person feeling this way, and even on your darkest day there is always a way out.
you are a strong person for all that you have already gone through, and at the end of all this you will become stronger.
i lost my dad at 13 and my mom is pretty off the wall so i have always felt alone and misunderstood. but what you have to do is take your past and help others who are going through what you are and i guarantee you will lose those thoughts.

but you might want to go speak to a counselor just to have someone to talk to and help explain why you are feeling the way you are and give you tips on how to get out
i wish you all the best and feel free to message me if you would like.

idntwanabhere

replied on June 6th, 2008

New User

My life sux!

:S Life Sux!!! I have no family, my dad gave up hi parental rights when i was a little girl and my mom hates me ever since i was born. Some say she tried to kill me when i was 2 months old I ended up in Galveston hospital for almost a year with a fractured skull. She (mom) told me 2 my face that she regretted taking me 2 the hospital that she should have left me there on the floor bleeding to death....I have been abused for 31 yrs. I have been married for 15 yrs. (since I was 18 yrs. and i'm 33 now) I have 4 kids and my 2 older kids chose their dad over me. Got divorced 10/23/07 and met a guy that told me he would never hurt me... But he is hurting me. He sits on the computer looking at porn websites, watches porn DVDs at work, looks at women and it makes me feel so ugly. He goes out every night and drinks. And he says he will go out every night because he can!! He talked to me about marriage and now he tells me "I am not going to get married ever" I have no family and no where 2 go because of him. I got fired on 01/08/08 for stupid reason that isnt my fault and my BF told me 2 move in with him blah blah blah...Too much BS

And now I feel worthless and ugly all over again. I hate my life!!

floambrg

replied on March 17th, 2009

New User

im confused

im brianna and im 13 i think im young for this stuff i dont have the couage to kill myself i dont have anyone to talk to everybody says they are but noo ne cant help i lost my lost and my friend turned on me my dad is always asleep and my mom is at wor and my sis is up her boyfriends butt so im alone im so alone but there id so much more i dont wanna scare anybody

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