Broken Hearted Forum - Married But Separated And In Love With a Married Man

Relationships > Broken Hearted Forum > Married But Separated And In Love With a Married Man

Q: Married But Separated And In Love With a Married Man

asked by: nice2beeme on April 25th, 2004

New User

I have been married for 4years. My husband and I have been together for 4years before we married. We have no kids together. Just the last past year we separated because of numerous of things. He constantly lies, he stole from me and he cheated on me. He has also been verbally abusive.So I decided to separate from him. Since we have been separated I ran into an old friend that I have always loved. My friend and I have been seeing each other for about eight months. He has been staying with me. He is also married. I have known him for about 20 years now. I have always been very attracted to this man. And he is attracted to me. My husband say that he loves me and that he is in love with me. I am not in love with my husand anymore and I have told him this. I really want my friend as my man. I know that at this time I can not have him this way.He tells me that he loves me just as much as I love him. We are both caught up into each other. What should we do? Do we continue to go on this way or should we go our separate ways? Help me out please

Replies(6)

2ferano

replied on May 2nd, 2004

Extremely eHealthy

You said this new guy (old friend) is "staying" with you. Does that mean he is separated too? If not, then no, leave him. If he has not left his wife, then he is not going to.
As for you and your husband, you don't love him anymore. Let it go. He was obviously not worth it in the first place. Sad but true. Just thank god you don't have kids to worry about. That always makes decisions one hundred times harder. Good luck.

insurancegirl

replied on May 5th, 2004

Extremely eHealthy

You both need to be honest if you are going to go on with this. I know it will be hard to be 100% with your hubby, and tell him you don't love him, and it will be hard for your other guy also. But if it is worth it you will be able to do it. This will be a major change in life for the both of you and in the end may push even the 2 of you apart. Just be open to this fact. If you both open up and it pushes you away. Then you need to go your seperate ways and start over.

~jennifer~

TX_momy

replied on May 21st, 2004

Experienced User

I belive if he is still married to tell him to get divorcet (btw you do that too) it's best that you have that clear. You already know how a married woman feels when her man is cheating, you don' t want your "friend" to do the same thing to his whife, or do you ??? Just set things clear and then if he is really true and loves you than he will get divorced even if he haves kids, it's better to stay appart than fighting in a house full of kids, any way just talk to him and see at the end its your call what ever you want to do.

Take care and write back k?

brandy11974

replied on July 6th, 2009

New User

I think you need to get the affairs of your own life in order before anything else. I know it's hard to make the right choice when your heart is screaming out for something that you're really forbidden to have. I find myself in that quandary as well. Love is a fascinating thing, but doing the right thing is important to how you live your life. Don't live so that you'll have regrets. Do what you need to do to be happy, and in the end that will be the right choice for you.

Sukki

replied on July 8th, 2009

Experienced User

I have to agree with TX_momy. Ask him to div and not to put u into further pain... and also for ur good so nobody will think of u as a 3rd party

Evco3

replied on October 1st, 2009

New User

Hey you 2 idiots this post was made 5 years ago. I think it is a little to late to respond to this post

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