Is it completely out of the question to ask her about what that "thing" she thought was? Without seeming like you're prying? Maybe if you approach her without accusation but with sympathy and concern she will let her guard down and tell you exactly what she's got going on.

when she told me that she had this thought, she said she wouldnt tell me... then speaking to her later on the phone, she said that she'd tell me then hang up straight away so i couldnt ask about it or anything. But in the end, she changed her mind.

Hey Lewis,

Sorry to hear that man.

You sound like a you've got a good heart and I sincerely respect your concern for her. Remember that alot of girls (especially young and thoroughly commercially brain washed ones) are completely crazy. Any attempt to figure them out or salvage a broken self esteem is not only futile but dangerous for your own well being. If you feel that she is exhibiting unhealthy behaviour, then don't be afraid to confront her about it. Set your boundaries, and if you feel that she is not responding in a healthy adult manner, then move on. It will send a much stronger signal for her that her modus operandi is not working than any "baby, don't worry i love you, the way you are" sweet talk will ever help.

Whenever we say that sort of stuff it goes in one ear and comes out the other. It only feeds her false ego and contributes to the complex. Don't reward her negative behaviour with caring attention, you will strengthen it. Set your boundaries, and if they are violated run for your life man.

I've been through the same thing hundreds of times. There are healthy girls out there, and you don't have to play doctor for the rest of your life. Sometimes a good break up will actually help her to see the ridiculousness of her actions.

Good luck man.

Wow, Daniel.... I feel like I should put on my girl claws on principle, but you're right. I don't think he should leave RIGHT away, only after he's tried sincerity and she doesn't respond positively, then leave. But hey maybe if she cuts it out- it DOES sound like she's being immature- and realizes that the relationship is more important than her little melodrama then it can work out after all.
(Sorry for the harshness.)

That might be a good approach actually. At the moment, she seems to be back to her normal self and she told me that she was only joking about the throwing up thing... i know that can be hard to believe, but i know when she is telling the truth. We're going out for dinner on Friday, that might be a good chance to observe how she acts about eating. I know she is keen on getting appertite supressant tablets, but i don't know how good they are. She had lost weight on them before but when she didnt have the money to get more, she put the weight back on. Can anyone tell me anything about how good they are? I have found a few that are in a health shop (sells all sorts of supplements from Cod Liver Oil to Creatine) and they seem to be okay... but a little more information, if it can be provided, would be nice

You sound like a really supportive and great boyfriend! She's lucky to have you.

Hello Lewis,
Any kind of synthetic suppressants do not contribute to health. You need to read labels and watch what you buy. Is she eating healthily - balanced meals? Go see a nutritionist and a good probiotic (friendly bacteria) will help the digestive system.
it occurs to me that she using yr caring nature too well and sucking yr energy. Like Daniel said, set boundaries. Exercise your choice and make it powerfully w/o blaming anyone especialy yourself.

Have you ever had an eating disorder? no? well how dare you tell him to leave his gf? he loves her! i suffer from anorexia and it has caused many probs with my parter-but he loves me and supports me-a real man sticks around when times are tough-not run like a coward!

Have you ever had an eating disorder? no? well how dare you tell him to leave his gf? he loves her! i suffer from anorexia and it has caused many probs with my parter-but he loves me and supports me-a real man sticks around when times are tough-not run like a coward!

////[quote="danielv"]Hey Lewis,

I've been through the same thing hundreds of times. There are healthy girls out there, and you don't have to play doctor for the rest of your life. Sometimes a good break up will actually help her to see the ridiculousness of her actions.////


Ok, Daniel, it is so obvious that u have been in such situations hundreds of times, i bet you go for another hundred! you problem is : YOU ARE NOT A RELIABLE MAN, GIRLS HAVE A NOSE FOR THAT AND RUN AWAY!

AM I RIGHT?