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Recently Separated Twin Mommy

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Hello, I'm twenty-two years old and I am a proud mother of beautiful 9 month old twin daughters. To give you all some back story, in the beginning of December my husband and I re-located from Arizona to Washington State, due to my husband losing his job because of his alcoholism and being consistently late to work for months. My father welcomed our family into his home temporarily as a fresh start until my husband became employed once more and we could afford an apartment on our own.
I made it clear to my husband before we came to WA that he was not to drink in my fathers home. He agreed to not drink and that it was a great new start for our family to become whole again. Needless to say, he began drinking in my fathers home after three days of us living here. When he would ask me if I minded him drinking I would tell him every time that it made me extremely uncomfortable and that I was not happy about it. Which didn't make a difference in his decision to drink.
My father pulled my husband aside on two different occasions, making him aware that he knew he was drinking and that it had to stop or he was kicking him out of his home. My husband ended up drinking for the last time in my father's home last Saturday and since then it has been an absolute mess. I've heard everything imaginable that could be negative about myself.
Which hurts because he's blaming everyone but himself for his own actions that landed him where he is now. I've told him that he has to spend some time away from myself and the girls so that he can get his priorities straight. Is it us or the bottle? For a couple of years now my husband has been unable to stop drinking, unable to help me with our children in the morning, since about two months after they were born, and unable to get himself together.
Am I doing the right thing by separating from him and letting him get his head together? I think I am. Ever since this has happened he's had it set in his mind that our marriage is over. Maybe to him it is. I do hope that he loves myself and his children enough to straighten his life out. I miss the man I used to know years ago...anyway, I've rambled on enough. There's much more but I've already written a book Wink

Any advice or encouraging words would be appreciated. I'm sorry this was so lengthy but I've got a lot on my mind.
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replied January 14th, 2008
Extremely eHealthy
I'm sorry you are going through this tough time. I do think you are right in separting from him. He needs to get his priorities straight and put his family before his alcohol. Has he tried any type of rehab program? Maybe he could be talked into that? I hope things get better for you soon.
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replied January 14th, 2008
Extremely eHealthy
in my opinion you did the right thing for you and your babies, none of you deserve to be with an alcaholic, and if he doesnt get himself straightened at least you can get out there and find someone who will be there for you and your kids

and until then we are here if you need us

good luck

~alicia~
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replied January 15th, 2008
Especially eHealthy
from the topic title i thought you ment you twins were seperated lol.

I think you are 100% in the right to have a seperation, your husband needs to come to terms with the fact that hes an alcoholic and get professional help. I hope he does and realizes you and those babies are the best thing in his life.

good luck
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replied January 19th, 2008
Thank you all for your kind words. I truly appreciate it Smile
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