Hey guys.
I just wanted to apologive for not being around much.
Things have been extremely hard for me lately.
I don't really want to talk about it.
& Contrary to popular belief, I am not
drinking too much or turning to substance abuse.
I'm so extremely depressed.
I don't want to eat, I don't want to get up
in the morning, yet I don't want to sleep.
I can't concentrate on anything at all.
I don't want to do anything at all.
I've been holding it together for Gabe,
because I love him so much more than anything.
But even staying strong for him is so hard, now.
I just keep thinking about how I don't want to live, anymore.
My anxiety is through the roof.
I literally have bitten a hole in my lip.
& Keep biting & biting at it.
I'm in a constant state of paranoia.
It's just gotten really out of hand.
But, I'm getting help.
I've been putting off doing this for years.
But I've made an appointment.
Hopefully soon I can feel & act like myself again.
Something I haven't been able to do since
I was probably... about 13.
I just wanted to say I love you guys.
Thanks for always being here for me.