First of all, how old are you?

Ending your own life is no way to fix anything. Sometimes that seems like the only way you have to turn, but I can assure you that it isn't going to make you happy.

At this day and age, it is very hard to get on in the world. It is very demanding, requires more of some people than they can handle. But each person does have their place in the world and you have to ask yourself in you are in it or not, and if maybe it only takes a little bit more effort on your part to take a step upward.

Do not worry about being unattractive. This is not something that you can really change without cosmetic procedure, and really, this isn't something that will help. You must be more confident in the person that you are, know that you are special and that there is no other person in the world like you.

All because you feel that you are unattractive does not mean that you are either. With low self-esteem, it would not matter if you were the most attractive person in the world...you would still think that there was something that you needed to change. It is the person within that makes a face beautiful. Who would you rather have as a companion for the rest of your life? A model and superstar who was an discourteous and selfish, or a homely regular Jane/Joe Doe who was sweet and caring? Because you can decide who this person is going to be and you are this person and have to live with yourself always.

The best thing to do about the future is not to worry about it at this point. 10 or 20 years from now is too far away to guess. You never know what will happen by then, besides the fact that that is more than plenty of time to work on your life and achieve something higher.

I imagine that from your post saying that you have "poor English" that you are not from the states. I don't know where you are from, and what kind of education is available to you, but here there are many colleges that offer grants and scholarships to all kinds of people to further their education. Going to college would solve your problem with low education, give you companionship, and keep your mind off this "wishing for death". If college didn't work out for you, there are always books at your local library full of information that you can use to better your knowledge.

It is possible to have at least a part time job while going to school as well. You should challenge yourself, but don't overdo it. This would also help paying off your expenses going to college too if you decided to do that.

Do not worry about being old. Like I said, you cannot tell the future. You could get hit by a car tomorrow, or you could die from food poisoning 10 years from now. It's living every day as one day to the fullest and enjoying what you have that will be the best thing to do. Old age is a part of life and most people are going to get there...and it is not, again, the physicality of the person, but the mindset, the humor, the friendliness that will make a person that much more wonderful.

I guess what it boils down to is that you need to focus on the now. Get out and make a difference.......Looking ahead as far as you are isn't going to help you. Look at what you can change today to make yourself happier and those tomorrows will take care of themselves.

mominashoe,

You have been a very good person to me. Thanks for your reply.

I am living in Hong Kong. Have you heard that before. It is one of the most unhappy city in the world. People are rich but unhappy. Polarization between the poor and the rich is severe.

I have dropped out from the university before. I have been studied for 1 semester. It is the money and the exam i can't get rid of.

I am not so depressed indeed. However, I am either being happy or unhappy.
I am living but don't know for what. I am waiting the time passing.

Maybe i am lazy and used to live like this. hahah.

life changes
things will get better but its up to you to make it that way
how you act,talk,where you live greatly affects the person you are everyday
if you make a happy life for yourself you will be a happy person
best of luck to you and your future
you sound like you will be alright its good to reach out and look for help when you need it. theres nothing wrong with askimng for help and advice sometimes

i hope things look up for you soon
good luck