Im faling into a downward spiral of anorexia, again, for those that dont know i was anorexic and bulimic for 5 yrs i was in therapy for a year in 2004 but i stopped oging when she opened her own practice and didnt acept my insurance theni got pregnat and ive ben doing ok until now, THe naging thoughts are in my head constantly teling me how fat i am and how gross i look , I constantly stare at my disgusting body, im afraid to step on the scle i might break down and cry becuase of what the numbers say. Its like i can feel the eating disorder slowy creping back into my life and i dont know what to do. In a way i want itback so bad, livng off diet coke for days on end. 300 calorie days and feling light as a feather, i just posted it here because iknow you girls so well more so then the ones in the eating disorder forum. gah i just i dont know ifel lost and confused and i hate being fat.