get out of the relationship your in

do not continue to keep lying to this woman
that is wrong
you cant help your feelings
but you CAN help your actions

Do you love your wife at all?

i don't know if i love her. i mean, i love her as much as anyone i have been acquainted with for so long - but i am at a point where i just don't know what love is. it's hard to clarify. i wouldn't want to hurt her, but that's not really enough to sustain a marriage, is it. i didn't mention it before, but there isn't much that can be done because we have a baby now - i wanted to keep him out of it... i guess i've dug my own grave here. i feel like i should stay in this marriage for him - but what kind of marriage can it be? is this really what's best for him?

this is not a good position for this child to be in either. its only going to get worse
the confusion you have is only going to lead to lies,cheating,etc
would you want this child to have to go through this in the long run? no
you wouldnt want him to grow up knowing daddy lied and cheated on mommy. whatever happens either strive to fix this relationship or end it.

for the sake of this kid.

if you really want to try and make it work go to marriage classes. dig deep. why did you love this woman in the first place? why are you with her in the first place? what sparked things in the begining? maybe theres a way ton rekindle that...
if not then you need to let go and get out.

does your wife know how you feel?

You stepped over the line before you confronted your feelings with your wife..
It is not fair to stay with your wife and lie behind her back. If you are still seeing the other women you need to end it. She is married too, both of you are in the wrong. Get out of your marriages or get into your marriage and leave each other alone..
you and the other women are being deceitful.. When people have affairs they tend to make things at home to be worst than they really are to justify the affair. If it was that bad at home you should have talked to your wife first.
Did you love your wife when you married her? If so what happened?

To be honest, it sounds to me like you are feeling trapped. Now there is a child and you have a responsibility to this child. Your situation sounds like a typical one. I don't want to offend you, but I think you are just going through something that a lot of males go through when they don't want to settle down or are afraid of settling down. You might disagree with me, but I'm going to have a hard time believing you if you do because you have didn't marry her and continue sleeping with her just because. You obviously chose to get married, did you not? Your life is the way it is because of your decisions! The best thing you can do is talk to your wife and see a marriage counselor.

As far as this other female goes, you need to discontinue a relationship with her of any kind. You might not be happy in your marriage right now, but that doesn't mean you have an excuse to disrespect the commitment you made.

I think what's wrong in most relationships is the concept of "falling into love" which means you could just fall out of it. Most of the time we use that excuse to get out of a relationship, that we couldn't just help but fall out of love with that person. It's ok if you're not married and you don't have any kids to talk about. But the fact that you're married means that you did make that commitment. Being in a relationship takes work. Loving a person and choosing to continue loving that person takes work. Sometimes I think that people who fall out of love is just lazy. Separation / divorce makes everything so easy and meaningless.

Why do you feel so trapped? How do you think your wife feels about you? Have you even done your share in making the relationship work? When you realized that there was something wrong, what did you do to fix it or all you did was go to work and avoid confrontation?