I haven't been here for a while, partly discouraged from not having a lot of conversation around my boring question, which for me was very urgent. Thank you Georgia for the great link - it helped a lot.
Over a month I was investigating this issues by consulting many psychiatrists, and I came to the understanding that there is really no option for me to go through another pregnancy without medications. It's taking to much risk despite the fact that I've been through two full pregnancies without any med. However, since I had a manic episode recently, the recommendation for me is to be on Lithium through the entire pregnancy. I made the decision for myself that if this is the case, I'm not going to have another baby. The decision is after all - the parents' decision, and everyone is different and has different circumstances. Since I already have two kids, I don't feel that my desire for another baby should put in risk what I already have.
For you, Puzzld, I wish you will find a way to have a baby. There are many bipolar women who have babies. Maybe it will take time until you feel better and stable - and that takes a lot of work, and balanced medications too. There are medications that had not been proven to cause damage during pregnancy, and maybe your doctor should consider testing those with you. But as I said - each of us is very different and we need support from a good doctor, and from our family and friends.
Good luck