It does sound like nerves. Maybe either try singling out what you are nervous about, or if you could, try taking it slow with her, get used to each others bodies and when you're completely comfortable try sex again.

i have the same problem, i think its Performance Anxiety. i'v been dating this girl for 3months now and sometimes its hard for me to get an erection and when i do its not good hard enough to do the job. I have been getting a lot better lately by calming myself down and i also told her my problem and she understands i think that is helping my as well. Sometimes i do get a full erection but it doesn't last and just gos to a 60% erection, does that happen to you?
i was not always like this when i first met her i would be able to get full erections but rich before i would insert it i would loose my boner.
anyone know anyways to overcome this?

anyone with info?

Well, in the case that it is performance anxiety, I have come up with potential solutions based upon what I've read.

I have no way of knowing if these will work, so don't be mad at me.

Clear your mind. The more you think about your problem the more it will occur. Forget about past experiences, don't let them haunt you. All you have is here and now, clean slate.
Forget home plate, there isn't anything going on there until you KNOW you can conquer the problem, so check out how second and third are doing. Focus on her. If you think you can make her feel good without using that thing down there, why not try?
Put a little emotion into it. Think about how the 2 of you are feeling, other than horny.



That's all I got. I'm probably talking fluff, so don't bother taking my advice if it sounds stupid! Sorry!

Hi, this is just anxiety I'm sure. nothing to worry about as the human mind is a chaotic place sometimes and it is widely known that the "sexual center", the place that allows everything to happen, is the brain.

first, heres some questions.
1: do you get morning erections?

2: before or during sexual "relations" do you think about this problem, or "wonder" if your going to achieve an erection?

3. have you tried just focusing on her and "foreplay" (such as cunnilingus) and not yourself?

lets review your answers, shall we?

1. If you achieve morning erections this means there is generally no testosterone deficiency and your "physical" equipment is alright (generally). This would mean its most obviously psychological.

2.If you focus on things other then sex, expecially anxiety producing things you will not achieve an erection. Stress and anxiety are 80-90% if not more the cause of "young" male erectile dysfunction.

3.If you "go down" on her and just focus on her body, her taste, her noises and "feel" the moment, I'm positive you will achieve an erection. By forgetting a problem YOU DON'T HAVE you can experience the connection between two people sexually and give her massive amounts of pleasure, this in turn will naturally arouse you and give you an erection.

The problem with anxiety and "failure" is it grows upon itself, the same goes for success and confidence. people take "personally" there achievements or lack there of. By taking away this "internal" focus (the problem) you can achieve a natural (auto-pilot) stimulation and arousal.

I to have experienced all this, its hard and it hurts. I have been there and I will gladly respond back to any messages you send me. But you know what, it was all mental. I was with a girlfriend and experienced an "ED" moment. I was stressed about work and my health, I'm a hypochondriac for sure! this anxiety caused me to loose erection when changing positions.
Lucky for me I was with a very determined women and she used her mouth to "get me up". After about three minutes of nothing I said "its not working, im so messed up". Her response saved my sex life, she said "don't think about anything but my mouth on your #$%@". Between thinking about that and the girl from the cellphone store, I was harder then a rock and finished in two minutes.

What am I saying by telling this story, as im surly not bragging, LOL. What I am saying is often HONESTY about whats going on in your head will not only "flatter" her but releve the negative tension that is causing "the problem". People need to talk about what is troubling them to start a constructive "fixing" process, who better to talk to and tell how you feel then her, the (somewhat) cause.

I feel for you and I hope this helps.

can Performance anxiety cause PE aswell, because sometimes when i do get it hard enough then i start thinking about "am i going to last long enough?" then i cum within the first min. when i masturbate i can last over 20mins, but sometimes i think about "i hope i don't cum fast" then i can only last about 5mins.

Edit: actually when i put it in its only about 70% erect maybe less.

Well, thats a very good question. Generally the mind works in an associative circle (the best way I can put it). If you think about ejaculating fast while your having sexual intercourse then it almost becomes a "self fulfilling prophecy".

Take are topic starter for example, He worries about his erection loosing stiffness and as a result, it goes limp. Is there a physiological reason for his penis to go limp, Probibly not, it's all psychological. apply this same idea to your situation and you have your answer.

The mind you must always remember is a chaotic and uncharted place, it will develop anxieties and problems unless you know how to control or understand your mind. There is a "plethora" (I just watch the three amegos) of DVD's and MP3's devoted to helping people who suffer from PE. Im just amazed there are not the same "devices" for those suffering psychological ED.

I'm a girl so I hope U don't mind me give-n my opinion..... I don't kno much bout this, but I would seriously try 2 have more 4play. Tell her 2 tease U a lil, & c if it helps. My bf dosn't have dis prob., but I kno when we 4play a lot B4 or I tease him a lot B4 we have sex, it makes him more and more erect.