|The one thing about online dating that has always struck me as an observer is that people generally present themselves the way they want to be percieved. Sometimes, this projection isn't entirely accurate and it can make things go awry when you finally meet each other.
I think if you're using online dating as a means of building a lasting relationship, there is no way to go but slowly. You're going to have to be patient and wait 'til you meet a few times to test the waters. That way you can see what he's really like, and he can see what you're really like... in person without phone/email/messaging barriers.
So. Conclusion: Don't ask any questions on where you two stand until you meet up a few times. I think that's the safest, smartest way to go.
|I think you're over-analyzing too much. You're also jumping to conclusions based on phone/online conversations.
Meet them first. There is nothing wrong with casually dating two people at the same time. It becomes wrong if one of them has feeling for you and you don't share them.
Test the waters and stop making this harder than it is.... it's just a waste of your energy. Wait 'til you meet them and assess from there.
|Glad to hear you know what you want, and you don't settle for anything less! Continue it with this guy!|
|Things will happen when they're meant to. It still hasn't been that long. Just make sure you go with your gut. Don't continue to date someone just because you dont' want to hurt their feelings. And if you have a 'feeling' about someone... deal with it right away to avoid heartache later!!|
I wish you the best!!!
|good attitude,man...you will be OK, I just know it!|
|AAHHHHH...young love....isn't it great?? Have fun, play safe if you play and toss a salad with that pasta!! Good luck, let me know cuz I am gonna live vicariously threw you cuz I have been married forever!!!|
Not exactly young - I'm 30 And I always play safe
My biggest beef lately with the GLBT community is the lack of the LTR concept. I know this may be a bit off-topic, but I feel it applies.
The dating sites I frequent (I'm cheap - I don't primarily use match.com or gay.com or any pay-dating sites) are chock full of people looking for "hook ups" or "friends with benefits". I don't see the reasoning behind either concept. But at the same time, finding someone that is looking for a LTR is like finding a needle in a haystack, or so it seems. I am of the ilk that prefers to have that 1:1 monogamy, that ultimate commitment. Just something about being able to share lives together, hand in hand, is just so much more beautiful to me than just hopping in the sack with anyone that is just flat out horny.
Before I started dating this second guy I am seeing tomorrow night, I would browse, night after night, shaking my head and going WHY??? So many cute guys out there, all they want is a quick romp in the hay. It is almost as if we are going back to Woodstock of '69, or back to the Roman Catholics, where sex was so free-based, and had virtually no meaning.
I guess what triggers this is that you announced that you are married. And I say that YOU ROCK for having your man's hand in marriage. That is something I ultimately want one day. Committment is such a beautiful thing, and it is probably the greatest feeling in the world knowing that you have someone you can say "I love you" to, and mean it for a variety of reasons.
Anyways, thats my rant for the evening. I will post how it goes tomorrow night when I get a second.
I love it. Though I am all about "To each his own", meaning you can have sex with whoever you want, as much as you want... I think the gay community is obsessed as retaining "Sex" as a part of it's integral identity. This bothers me because there are so many of us who prefer to have commitment and safety and that one special person. I have it, and I'm so lucky to have found him, but I find it's all too rare. Irresponsible sex and relationships can be so dangerous, physically and emotionally.