Bipolar Disorder Forum - Worried About My Sleep Quality

Hi All,

I am new to the forum. I am a 36 year old, married male, with three children. I am currently self-emloyed, but selling my business. It's been a good businss, but has not been the financial success we expected. In fact, financial stress is an issue we have dealt with over the past year. I am dealing with the depression involved with selling the business, as I do not really WANT to sell it, but felt I had to (it's been like giving up a child, almost). I, also lost my father, who was my best friend, a little more than a year ago. We want to leave town and pursue a job offer in another area, but I do not want to leave my mother. That's my sad story! My problems are not SPECIAL, in any way, but I want to illustrate the stress with which I am dealing. I have tried to be open about my bi-polar disorder, but now have some paranoia about what people around me think. I believe, also, my hypomanic phases have caused some horrible financial decisions.

On the other side, I have my wife and children. Especially, my youngest daughther, still has the 'daddy's girl' thing going on..so, for me, that's a good thing. The other is a pre-teen, and too 'cool' for dad (haha). My wife has been very patient...and listens to me, when I need to ramble. We are strong in our relationship with one another and with God. We attend Mass every week and are very active in The Church, so that is something 'positive' to take me away from the business and money stress.

Now, finally, to sleep. Recently...over the past two weeks, I have found myself staying up until 2, 3, 4am...and getting up a little after 6. I run like crazy...in overdrive all day. Usually, I wake up depressed...I may have a short surge of energy around noon...or so...then go back to feeling tired and 'down' during the afternoon (I know, I sound like a fun guy, don't I?). Some nights, I may take a short nap (around 5pm)...maybe 30 minutes to an hour. This 'phase' hits me every few months. At times, when I am up late, I will work on businss-related things. But, in truth, I usually find myelf in the mood to read and learn something new. It's usually, something religion-related, language-related (I speak 4 languages...and working on #5), or about bi-polar disorder, and/or fibromyalgia (yep, I am a GUY with FIBRO and bi-polar...am I screwed up, or what?). Also, I might get tied into something on The Discovery Channel or The History Channel.

What's strange here is that I take Lyrica (600 mg) for Fibromyalga. Instead of making me sleepy (as it does most), it's lke oxycodone to me. I makes me feel great. Not neccessarily manic...but, good...productive, etc. In fact, it probably clears my thinking process a bit. So, instead of the Lyrica helping me go to sleep, it works opposite with me (most times). I also take 1000 mg of Depakote and 30mg of Lexapro and 1-2mg of Ativan, as needed (which, in recent days, is often). However, it seems to give me a short euphoric period, or further energy surge...but, will eventualy take me down. But, if I take it too late, I am groggy in the morning. Sometimes, I may take Melatonin, instead of te Ativan.

During the day, I eat ver little, whenI am like this. I usually will have a small dinner...then, find myself eating a bag of popcorn at midnight.. Any other time, I TRY to have breakfast and dinner. I, almost never have lunch, unless it's a business thing.

Two weeks from now, I will probably be sleepy around the clock...so, it ocmes in 'cycles'.

I promise, as a newbie, all my posts will not be this long. However, I am wondering (at 1:08am...and still gong strong), if this sounds familiar to anyone else in the forum? How does this compare to your sleep experiences?

Thanks for reading, and my God Bless You All!