I May Have Bipolar Disorder ...I Am Not Sure But Posted: 11-29-07 03:47am
RIGHT! i have been worrying that i may
have bipolar disorder since i found the
symptoms online (i know what you are
probably thinking... probably "internet
hysteria" or something) but i sort of
ignored it for a while and recently i have
been watching Stephen Fry's program about
manic depression, now what i am wondering
is, judging by what i am saying below...
is it likely that i have bipolar
disorder?
mania i think i had for a while in my
primary school, i used to run around the
class, accept dares from my class mates,
stuff like can i walk around the class
room with my eyes closed and stuff like
that. basically anything that would
prevent me from having to do my work...
except for stuff i liked experiments (but
not the writing up of) and writing stories
about whatever i wanted. i don't remember
if i did have any depressions back then. i
put all this down to "bad behavior" and so
did my parents and teachers. BUT:
when i went to secondary school i started
acting in a stupid way like i did at my
previous school but it was really strange
behavior as apposed to "naughty" i also
remember being quite self concious so i
was seen as a bit wierd, then my grandad
died and that really dragged me down for
ages (obviously) but i do mean AGES like a
couple of years i did try and hide this
depression from family and friends. then
after a couple of years of getting bullied
i finally had enough so i just grabbed
this one kid that had been annoying me for
ages after he did something petty and not
worth worrying about, but it angered me
and i just couldn't help it. after that i
started feeling as though i could take on
everything and everyone from that moment
(i didn't but it was just good to know i
could). got respect from people after that
and became less depressed but not really
manic either, just normal i suppose.
occaisonally i did have a bit of: "AGHH
why was i so stupid before" and moments
where i did my best to wind up my teachers
and friends. i've heard people who have
bipolar disorder generally miss a lot of
days of school/work, but if i had even
tried that my mum would have probably
carried me to school and forced me to go
in my pajamas!
Then i left school and got a job which i
started off being okay at... then i became
crap at... then got good again... then
bad, i can't really remamber how i felt at
the time, i do know that it wasn't just
off-days it was off-weeks and sometimes
months. occasionally i have gone out and
bought about £200 of DVD's CD's books
etc... most are unused and sitting in my
bedroom i hear this is a classic symptom.
I am writing a book that comes very
fluently at times (as well as sometimes
getting ideas for other books half way
through that aren't remotely related) and
other times i have to struggle to think at
all let alone write a book. occaisonally i
do think about death and stuff and it
scares me but at the same time i don't
care... i have never truly thought about
suicide seriously by the way but if this
is bipolar disorder i'd rather know so
that i can deal with it in case my
symptoms get worse and i do considder
it... also what scares me the most is the
"family connection" i have heard about...
my dad can have rapid mood swings, get
angry over nothing and spends god knows
how much on CDs and DVDs a month...
so please tell me if you think i could be
bipolar, or just a hypochondriac
|
andrewcorbin20
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Dec 2007 Posts: 24 Location: Charlottesville, VA USA
It's Possible... Posted: 12-02-07 08:15am
Hey Dan, I'm Andrew. I'm not a doctor, or
anything of that fun matter, but I'm 20
years old, with schizoaffective disorder.
Which is a variation between schizophrenia
and bipolar. Anywho, if I WAS a doctor,
and going by what you explained, I
honestly would say your on the verge of
unipolar/bipolar disorder II. Although it
does seem to me that you've had symptoms
of mania, and extreme depression (minus
suicide), that's why I'm leaning toward
BPD II/Unipolar.. The way you explained
your past as a child, and also being in
moments where you don't really remember
until after the fact is a pretty big
symptom. Also, spending sprees for no
reason, just to buy, is pretty big is
well. When I hit my first manic episode at
the age of 18, I ran up 4 credit cards,
and took out 2 loans, and just bought
anything and everything. Since I've been
medicated, I've gotten out of all that
crap!!
Also with your family having "mood swings"
could contribute to some type of
psychiatric diagnosis for you, and even
them one day? I know that a lot of people
being diagnosed with BPD, they were at
some point detained/emergency protective
ordered, and admitted to a psychiatric
wards. Those are best ways for diagnosis,
for they can monitor all of your behavior
closely, for a correct diagnosis. I was in
the position, didn't like it, but now am
thankful for it.
So, I wouldn't say your hypochondriac, but
I would recommend seeing a Psych MD, or
get referred to one from your general
practitioner, that way you could be truly
diagnosed if need be. Hope this helps?
-Andrew
|
andrewcorbin20
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Dec 2007 Posts: 24 Location: Charlottesville, VA USA
By the Way... Posted: 12-02-07 08:20am
don't confuse my "BPD" with borderline
personality disorder... I mean it as in,
BI POLAR DISORDER... Which is correctly
written out as Bipolar Disorder.
sorry!
|
Dann0898
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Nov 2007 Posts: 3
Posted: 12-02-07 14:33pm
thanks Andrew! thanks for your reply.
i am going to my GP on tuesday about an
ingrowing toenail and was going to bring
it up, basically i was wondering:
would it be best to tell my mum about my
symptoms and my concern about my dad's
aswell... or just keep it secret even if i
get given like anti-depressants (although
my mum does know drugs (has a degree in
biomedical science or something) so she'll
know what they are if she finds them or
busts me taking them, and i can see that
would freak her out more.):
sorry about this but i just need advice...
i am starting to feel really worried about
going to the doctor i must admit (i don't
want to be commited but i am also worried
that he'll just do nothing... and also the
thought of seeing a psychiatrist is
worrying to, i know loads of people see
them but it just seems so surreal! and i
am even more worried about how my family
will see/treat me if they find out...
although again i realise it would probably
freak them out more if i didn't and had a
crash. but how do you tell your parents
you feel depresed and have thought about
suicide and death :S.
every thing just seems so surreal at the
moment, i just hope i have the bottle to
tell the doctor this stuff!
|
andrewcorbin20
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Dec 2007 Posts: 24 Location: Charlottesville, VA USA
Posted: 12-03-07 14:36pm
Hey Dan! Congrats on finally being able to
meet with your doc soon. I can't say
whether I'd tell my parents or what, but
if you were me, you wouldn't. See, if your
doctor sees the need, he'll refer you to a
psychiatrist, and with them you will be
evaluated, and your treatment will be
sought. Whether it be medication/therapy
or both, it all depends on your diagnosis.
Your GP is not going to diagnose you.
Well, with the basic "depression". But to
me, yours sounds more than that. And if
he/she does decide to place you on anti
depressants, you'll really be able to tell
if you are bipolar, and it's not a really
good way to find out, because you could
get extremely manic. So, hopefully you'll
be referred.
I was hospitalized, diagnosed, and I let a
few months go by before I told my parents.
Ya know, my mom is actually bipolar
herself, but I kind of felt ashamed? I'm
not sure why, but I didn't want people to
think I was "Crazy" or anything, ya know?
It's not just me that feels that way. Mom
knew I was seeing a psych, but didn't know
anything about medication, etc, etc. Also,
she doesn't know I was hospitalized for 9
days. We were arguing during that period,
so it was normal for us not to talk for a
few weeks. hehe. I think I'll tell her
later, when I feel the need, if ever.
The only way your doctor will have you
committed, is if you pose an immediate
danger to yourself, or others. So, stay
calm, cool, and collected, hehe. And don't
worry man, you shouldn't have to feel the
way you do about this situation, it's not
worth it. I mean, I felt the same way I
think, I was very nervous, and didn't know
how to sneak around the situation. Even
talking to the doc was crazy, because I
didn't know what to be honest about,
without being put away. But everything
will work out. If you need to be detained,
then so be it, there's a reason. And from
there, things should get better, whatever
you're treatment may be.
If you have any more questions about this
stuff, you can always email me: [edit for
personal contact information] there might
be something you don't want to talk about
in "public".. Let me know man, I'm here.
-Andrew
|
Dann0898
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Nov 2007 Posts: 3
Posted: 12-04-07 10:48am
cheers again, i know i probably won't be
held but if i am i'd rather (still
wouldn't be happy about it) but i'd rather
be detained after i finish my course lol
it sounds stupid but i am bout 5/6 months
away from getting a foundation degree and
being sectioned will make it really hard
to carry on once i get out :S
i do feel ashamed of being depressed it is
strange especially because i know loads of
people get depressed at some times in
their lives and as i say i swear my dad
gets it aswell but i am really worried my
parents will see it as me being lazy or
wanting to cop out if you know what i
mean.
another reason i am worried is that i may
be diagnosed and then have to tell the
DVLA, and my car insurance company
(premium hits the roof i'd bet because all
of a sudden i am a "risk") i suppose i
have to tell my job, college etc.
i think it'd be best to tell my parents
(especially my mum) i'm sure they'd
understand, but i think what if they
don't? i suppose i can always get them to
read up on it... damn it i hate this!
well i had to open my eyes just before
christmas didn't i? lol at a time i should
be getting excited i'm getting anxious and
worried!
|
andrewcorbin20
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Dec 2007 Posts: 24 Location: Charlottesville, VA USA
;) Posted: 12-04-07 18:00pm
Don't worry, don't worry..... It causes
too much stress in life.
Don't feel ashamed about your feelings, I
know that's one of my biggest regrets. Now
that I know I have a psychiatric illness,
I know that the feelings and thoughts are
a little more "normal" for my situation..
And don't worry
about anyone being notified of anything.
Your diagnosis is private. Although if
you're bipolar, you won't be allowed to
join the army/navy/etc, and you won't be
able to purchase guns (in most
situations). Which is only to protect
yourselves, and others, because you are at
extreme risk sometimes, I won't lie.
Just really stop worrying so much. You
need to focus on bettering yourself, and
don't worry about what your friends or
family think. You have one life, you
deserve for it to be the best you can make
it become. So DO THAT!
Stay calm, COOL, and COLLECTED. Get
excited for Christmas, keep up with your
schooling, and just be you. It's all that
matters.
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SmartyShirt
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Dec 2007 Posts: 140 Location: ,
Posted: 12-05-07 18:25pm
u prollt do
|
Birch
Supporter
Joined: 07 Nov 2005 Posts: 4038 Location: Bliss,
Thanks: 142
Thanked:13
Posted: 12-05-07 18:41pm
SmartyShirt
wrote:
u prollt
do
It is important to specify why you feel
that way.
|
Birch
Supporter
Joined: 07 Nov 2005 Posts: 4038 Location: Bliss,
Thanks: 142
Thanked:13
Posted: 12-05-07 18:41pm
SmartyShirt
wrote:
u prollt
do
It is important to specify why you feel
that way.
|
andrewcorbin20
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Dec 2007 Posts: 24 Location: Charlottesville, VA USA
? Posted: 12-06-07 04:10am
Birch
wrote:
SmartyShirt
wrote:
u prollt
do
It is important to specify why you feel
that way.
why he feels what way? didn't he do enough
explaining?
sometimes you can't pinpoint any specific
reason why you're feeling depressed, and
soforth.
And don't worry
about anyone being notified of anything.
Your diagnosis is private. Although if
you're bipolar, you won't be allowed to
join the army/navy/etc, and you won't be
able to purchase guns (in most
situations). Which is only to protect
yourselves, and others, because you are at
extreme risk sometimes, I won't lie.
