Hi mommabear16, well im new and have only just joined. Im kerrie, im 21yrs and from england.
I know the feeling of why you cant get rid of this awful thing and I always wonder how I got so bad.
With your feelins about stephen dont blame yourself, he seems like he was so wrapped up in his own feelins and thoughts that he forgot about you, he was selfish and attention seeking if you ask me, he wasnt taking any of your feelins into account and thought about him self and that he would get you back. He wasnt right for u, and he should grow up and learn that. You've got a gorgeous baby boy now to have so many happy times with and this new boyfriend will help you though things. I know sometimes the people closest to us are the ones we find it hardest to talk too, but if your open about ur feelins you'll get through it so much better. If I cant possibly talk to the people closest then I talk to someone I dont know, a counseller, then I can just leave the room get it off my chest and then go back when im ready to deal with it again.
Kerrie