Medical Questions > Relationships > GLBT Relationships Forum

Kids

i was just wondering if kids can be gay or lesbians or bisexual
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replied November 21st, 2007
Especially eHealthy
what do you mean "kids"?
how young?
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replied November 21st, 2007
i was just curious any age was just asking
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replied November 21st, 2007
Especially eHealthy
i dont know
different people think different things
some believe kids are "born gay" some think they grow up to become that way

we really dont have a way to know

me personally i found out when i was 11 that i was Bi.
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replied November 21st, 2007
Especially eHealthy
Well here's the thing... Children are not sexual beings. They cannot have a sexual preference. Is their sexuality already determined? In most cases yes. That doesn't mean they are gay or straight at a young age; they are just a kid. Your sexuality does not manifest until you hit puberty.
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replied November 22nd, 2007
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I think that 'homosexualness' manifests itself differently in kids. It has nothing to do with sexuality as much as it has to do with preference... preference for friends... what they play with (not sexually.. I mean toys, games etc. etc.) and how they choose to express themselves. Many kids who do things that are not characteristic of their gender end up being gay. Unfortunately many people consider this a "warning sign" and not simply a natural way to grow up, so it is often discouraged (which can lead to problems later on down the road). I would say that this is a huge reason why so many young or 'just outed' homosexuals have so many problems with self image and confidence... or why many have problems coming out in the first place. Much of it boils down to the rigid gender roles we have.
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replied November 22nd, 2007
Experienced User
i have a friend. he has been doing balley and like being friends with only girls and just doing girly things ever since he was like 2. And not because he didnt have guy friends just because he wanted to do what girls did, he liked it more. So i think some kids r born gay some arent.
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replied November 22nd, 2007
Especially eHealthy
As I said, sexuality is determined by genetics but NO child is born straight OR gay - because children do not have sexual urges. Homosexuality or Heterosexuality are words referencing a sexual preference. A child cannot be gay or straight.

The child may show tendencies that will manifest as straightness or gayness at puberty, but as a child they are not actually gay OR straight.
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replied February 15th, 2008
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Eiri wrote:
As I said, sexuality is determined by genetics but NO child is born straight OR gay - because children do not have sexual urges. Homosexuality or Heterosexuality are words referencing a sexual preference. A child cannot be gay or straight.

The child may show tendencies that will manifest as straightness or gayness at puberty, but as a child they are not actually gay OR straight.


True. And like you said, when you do reach the age of being sexual, you are who and what you are and no one or nothing can make a straight kid gay or a gay kid straight or a bi kid straight or gay, etc.
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replied April 17th, 2008
I agree with Tylanas. Kids can't be gay or straight, because these terms have to do with sexual urges, which kids can't feel until puberty.
What flurries is talking about, a boy playing in a girly way, that is not quite the same thing.
Yes, there is a chance the boy will be gay later in life, but there is also a chance that he won't.
What he is though is effeminate. He is a male who happens to enjoy the more feminine things. Some males are this way and are sexually attracted to women, and some are sexually attracted to males, or to both sexes.
Me myself have no problem with this, I think that as long as a person is not harming anyone or themselves, then they should be free to enjoy themselves.
I think though a parent or grownup who does make a big deal about a boy being effeminate will only make the boy feel ashamed for enjoying the things he enjoys, which in effect could cause problems and resentments in the parent-child relationship, and also could cause some life-damaging psychoses in later life.
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replied April 17th, 2008
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Ani_stasia, I agree...a child should never be stifled from being there authentic self..what they are is who they are and as long as they feel love and loved then its all good.
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replied April 18th, 2008
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Tylanas wrote:
Well here's the thing... Children are not sexual beings. They cannot have a sexual preference. Is their sexuality already determined? In most cases yes. That doesn't mean they are gay or straight at a young age; they are just a kid. Your sexuality does not manifest until you hit puberty.


I'm not so sure about this one.

When I hit puberty, I knew it, because I was having fantasies about girls at the time. Over the course of the next few years, however, I began getting more attracted to guys, and if anything, up until my first boyfriend, I always had thoughts about girls, even if the majority of my thoughts were about guys.

Could I be bi? Maybe... however, I do not see myself dating another woman in my lifetime. I could be thinking of things in more of a "what if"-type situation, but we are all only human.
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replied April 19th, 2008
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I must be premo-ultra-uber-gay...I have never had a fantasy about a woman or a girl even when I was young....always fantasized about men even when I was having my first sexual thoughts.....not one...unless you count a couple of dreams about Madonna and what can I say, its Madonna!Smile
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replied April 20th, 2008
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I was head over heals for women up until probably 9th grade. Then something happened and the penis switch came on, and it won't turn off. I'm not complaining!
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replied April 20th, 2008
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Laughing penis switch Laughing Laughing Laughing
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