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Mfm Threesome For Your Wife (Page 2)


October 9th, 2009
this is a fantasy of mine and I find that people who give advice based on zero experience and a judgemental perspective would do better to stay quiet. If you have had the experience then give advice if you haven't don't judge - I love my wife very much but she is not my property and why wouldn't I be happy for her if getting made love to by another man turned her on - if the only reason your wife is your wife is because she doesn' know better and you don't want to open that door - then is that love? I don't think so. In my case my wife is not interested so I don't push, sad for me, but she is happy that way and because I love her that is the way it is.
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replied October 10th, 2009
Extremely eHealthy
Hey Skirabbit
Let me make sure I under stand you correctly. While you've not had a threesome outside of your fantasy you're completely endorsed to advocate behavior that relationship experts continuously advise against, However the one person in this thread who's objected based opinion rather than personal experience would do better to stay quiet?? Just to make sure isn't that a Red Flag for you too?
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replied October 10th, 2009
Wolf you misunderstand - I am not judging nor endorsing just questioning the motives people with no experience give. People talk about love when what they are doing is not loving. You are of course entitled to your opinion - and if you can provide some reference to back up your claim which is not based on religious grounds I would be happy to read it.
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replied October 10th, 2009
Extremely eHealthy
Hey skirabbit
You misunderstand. I am judging. You're talking about a fantasy. This isn't about what you know. You've got the Dear Penthouse Forum version of a threesome in your mind. Everybody gets together with big grins, nobody freaks out at the last second and starts a fight with you. After you and your wife pass out with big happy smiles the third person evaporates without getting obsessed. Neither or your wife get attached, clean happy finish. Thinking a threesome is dangerous isn't about not knowing your partner, it's about not knowing anything. It's about not really knowing where the trust ends between two people until you cross that line. It's about not knowing who you are until you're past the point of no return with this. It's about whole different sets of consequences of choosing a lover between when you're single and when you're involved, married, a parent. Everyone who's had a threesome was sure going in that it wasn't a big deal but only some of them, as you can read here, were right.
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replied October 11th, 2009
Wolf of course what you say makes a lot of sense - that is why it would be interesting to hear about peoples real experiences instead of opinions and conjecture. It is just very hard to find the "truth" - you make some very good points - in fact when ever I have looked at potential candidates there has never been one for a variety of reasons - maybe there will always be a reason to keep the fantasy a fantasy - however I have also read the opposite how something like this did wonders for a relationship - I suppose there is no wrong or right answer for everyone - it is a matter for each couple to decide what is right for them.
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replied October 19th, 2009
A reply to Wolf and Skirabbit on Threeway Encounters
I tend to think both Wolf and Skirabbit are on to something, here. While one can conjecture endlessly over the possible detriments of engaging in threeway encounters, those concerns are only realized or dispelled after you've "rolled the dice," so to speak. And, of course, it really is a gamble. You can't know with any certainty how you or your partner will feel. But it's my opinion that, regardless of the outcome, the gamble pays off precisely because you now have the opportunity to learn something new about yourself. Why are you feeling jealous? Is it a "penis thing"? Are you frightened of being humiliated? Are you scared that you are opening a pandora's box of unpredictable sexual behavior? In the end, I think you two are quite right. These sorts of questions aren't answered until afterwards. You won't know until you know. But what I'm getting at *here* is that the emotional associations you've established with threeway sex -- be it disgust, anxiety, or interest and excitation -- can be remarkable learning tools. We North Americans often fail to make use of these tools because we aren't very reflective people. If you're disgusted, inquire into your disgust. If you're interested in threesomes, then why are you interested? How will engaging in threeway sex serve your relationship? How will it bring you and your partner closer together?

In these kinds of chat forums, the vaguely implied (but seemingly unanswerable) question is "should you have a threesome or not?" But I don't think that's an interesting question, and I don't think there's a useful answer either. *My point* is that threesomes are ideal activities for drawing on our emotional resources as learning tools, because they tend to raise so many intense feelings in people. So, in the spirit of learning, perhaps I can end with a few questions rather than a definitive answer....

Those of you considering a threesome, try asking yourselves the following questions: Ask, "What do I expect to gain here by participating in a threesome?" Will it deepen my relationship? My marriage? Do I want to share our love with another person? Why? Do I want to explore another person's body? Is there an element of abuse? Do I want to watch my wife defile herself? Do I want to be defiled?

If you ask these sorts of questions -- that is, questions pertaining to actual "feel" your desires have, rather than asking "is it right or wrong?" questions -- you can learn more about yourself as an idiosyncratic sexual entity. You'll also be able to communicate more clearly with your partner on why you want (or don't want) to engage in a threesome with them.

Similarly, if you are digusted at the idea of threeway encounters, inquire into the nature of your disgust. Visualize the disgusting act. What disgusts you about it? How does it disgust you? Where in your body do you feel your disgust? If you ask these sorts of feeling-oriented questions, rather than simply falling back into the religious and ethical beliefs you've acquired from your community, you can get closer to the heart of the matter. You can really start to understand not only *what* you want, but *why* you want it. And isn't that the point of sexual exploration? To pursue greater and more glorious heights of (mutual?) satisfaction?
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replied October 22nd, 2009
Hi Good Samaritan - I like your email - the thinking man´s view Smile The million dollar question is - have you tried it? It seems so difficult to talk to people who are experienced to get a balanced view - you either find accounts on swingers sites where of course they are all positive - or sites like this full of strong opinions not based on a real experience.

ciao

Ski
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replied June 29th, 2011
Mine is of true experience in more then enough to give advice as to how myself and My wife have dealt with the experience.
but each to their own either try or don't I say, and you have no idea how each of the actors will be in the long run until you try it.
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replied October 22nd, 2009
Extremely eHealthy
Is there a negative experience in this thread that isn't based on a personal experience??
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replied October 22nd, 2009
Honestly Ski, if you've got the right kind of relationship for it, it's one hell of a lot of fun.
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replied October 27th, 2009
Experienced User
Goodsamaritan brings up some excellent points.

Failure of a relationship after a threesome does not come from the actual act of the threesome. It comes after the fact when our own personal insecurities in our relationship come to a head.

So much of the time people cannot separate a sex act from love. Sex does not equal love, it just enhances sex. It is possible to have mind blowing sex with someone you don't love then walk away. People will suffer through rotten sex all the time with someone they love. So, just because someone else brings your partner to orgasm doesn't necessarily mean they are ready to leave you in the light of day. It's the jealousy and insecurity in ourselves that make our partner walk away. Our inability to separate emotion from physical is what makes threesomes dangerous. It takes a certain kind of personality to watch or join your partner being pleasured by someone that's not you and be ok with that. It's not just the couple either. Threesome...three. There is another person there. Sometimes the third cannot separate. People tend to overlook the thirds emotions.

So much to consider. Threesomes are not for everyone but they are not for judgment either. IMO, couples that engage in threesomes successfully tend to have stronger relationships. They are communicating beyond what is considered "normal" They are successful because they are open and honest and aren't afraid to let their partner know what they are thinking and feeling. Not saying that couples that don't engage in threesomes don't communicate, just saying that it takes a certain, more intimate level of communication to tell your partner you want to have sex with someone else and want them to join and actually take pleasure in your partners pleasure even if it's being giving by someone or something that's not you.
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Users who thank LULZ for this post: Smartdummy 

replied December 1st, 2009
we love MFM
My wife and I have had about 12 or 15 MFM over the past two years...Wildest, most exciting thing we/I have ever done. She has the best looking and tasting p@@@y you will ever find and it drives the guys crazy. she is in her mid 40's, looks early 30's and likes guys 18 - 25 yrs and HUNG. Loves BIG c@@ks. I am only about 6", so it is really hot for both of us. Not all have been super hung, a couple even smalled than me. One guy who is about the same size as me both entered her at the same time. Drove her crazy. This same guy is the only one to do her more than once. About 5 or 6 times actually. One time, I let him do her in the back seat while I drove. Another time, I left them in the bedroom alone for a while while they did it. Mostly, i am in there f#$#ing her with the guy though. If you are a hot, hung, young guy in the ft myers florida area...hit us up.
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replied June 29th, 2011
Awesome, My exact thoughts and feelings, the best sexual pleasure my wife and I could experience, especially the dual penetration in the vagina, he was way larger then me but it was something we will never forget.

I Live in spam unapproved and used the swinger sites to find the guy's but it worked well..
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replied December 1st, 2009
Extremely eHealthy
Jinjer wrote:
Goodsamaritan brings up some excellent points.

Failure of a relationship after a threesome does not come from the actual act of the threesome. It comes after the fact when our own personal insecurities in our relationship come to a head.


With respect this is the equivelent of saying that the charred blackenned and smoking remains of your home wasn't caused by a fire but by the inheirent flamibility of the materials used to build your home.

If you can separate the emotions from the act of sex you have successfully lost your grasp of intimacy. And if you are so secure in your relationship why do you feel the need to bring in sexual partners other than your significant other? It just doesn't math.

I agree that there are people who are emotionally capable of having sex with multiple partners within the framework of a relationship and there are clearly those that are not. You can believe firmly that your relationship is fireproof but you will never know until you light that match each time if it will burn down around you.
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replied December 8th, 2009
Experienced User
I kind of assumed that many women fantasize about being with two men. I just figured it's more or less a common fantasy. I don't know if that is so.

Having said that. Dreams and fantasies come in the form they exist as, not in how we perceive they're going to be. Just think of adulthood. A child dreams of being an adult one day so they can be the rulemaker. When eventually they do become adults, the reality is different than the fantasy they had.

I'm a one-on-one kind of person, so I don't really relate much to the desire to have a third party there in real life.
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replied December 14th, 2009
It's bad news. Your spouse or GF usually gets turned on by it and leaves you for "other" sexual experiences.
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replied December 14th, 2009
Like I said.... From EXPERIENCE ....AND! from the experience of other friends,-NO! It's like the professionals say and like those with experience SAY! you LOSE when you do the 3some thing! It's not HOLLYWOOD here. It's NOT some PORN SET where everything ALWAYS ends up HUNKY-DORY! WAKE UP. My gosh, it's not rocket-science. If you've got something good, KEEP IT---DON'T SHARE/PASS IT AROUND like you're doing the one you are suppose to be IN-LOVE with some kind of favor. You asked for FACTUAL responses.....well, we just gave you one based on NUMEROUS married couples ACTUAL experiencing of PURE GRIEF from TORN relationshipS. Once that "other guy" enters YOUR WIFE'S, yes, quote "YOUR" wife's (not his) body and her emotional system (which it is PROVEN that a woman attaches MUCH MORE emotion to sex than ANY man does) then YOU LOSE! We are in our 50's and have been at this for over 30 years. ALOT of experience. Now, if you want to get together with friends and MUTUALLY satisfy each other,-FINE. That works out quite well alot of the time. 1.) You KNOW each other and trust there are NO STD's and 2.) You are already friends, so you can explore pleasure effectively over 2-4 hours one evening.
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replied December 14th, 2009
Extremely eHealthy
Who proved that women attach much more emotion to sex than any man does?
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replied December 14th, 2009
It's fully documented that through intercourse this happens. I don't have volumes of real individuals who have proven this in the medical and psychological field I have been in the last 30 years for nothing.
Hope this answers your question.
truemale M.D.
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replied December 14th, 2009
Extremely eHealthy
It actually doesn't. It just advances a sexist stereotype. If there's been some kind of recent medical study of ALL males and none of them hold more attachment than ANY woman then that statement might be factual. Men and women both process information differently, both are influenced by sexist tropes but ALL women don't do anything whatsoever.
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replied February 2nd, 2010
98.7% do.
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replied February 2nd, 2010
Community Volunteer
truemale: If you had any idea of the amount of posters that claim to be a Doctor, Registered Nurse, Psychologist and everything else under the Sun, you would know that these are wasted words.....The only true professionals are listed on the "Ask A Doctor" at the top of the page....Anyone else offers no validity so we must take their words as such...Take care...

Caroline
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