Ive been suffering with "depression" for about 9 years now. I use the term "depression" lightly as I genuinely do no know if that's what it really is.
I'm starting to think that there's more to it than just the blues.
I feel like there's two different versions of me, an extremely happy, bubbly, lively me, who experiments with colourful make-up, hair colours, clothing styles and who draws and writes and reads and loves her friends, and then there's the "depression" where I just cant do anything.
The happy me often starts things, but then the "depression" comes along and those things get forgotten about and never finished.
I used to self harm, and right now I'm in the "depression" stage, but I feel like the person who used to self harm was someone different. Sure I have the scars, but I can't understand why I would have done it.
I can expand a lot more on this, but as this is only an internet forum, I'm merely asking who would be the right person to talk to about all of this?
I've lost faith in medicine and doctors. I feel that they just don't care, that they just want to reap their big fat income and forget all about you when you leave their office. They've never gotten anything right for me, not even birth control, my IBS or why my chest hurt and my left side went numb last year.
I'm 23, and I can't live out the rest of my life feeling like this.