Bipolar? I Need Your Advice.. Posted: 11-15-07 15:13pm
Hi. I'm a twenty year old female and I've
been struggling with symptoms of what I've
finally come to realize could be bipolar
disorder. I just can't be sure, though. At
times I feel very very energetic and like
I can do anything. I signed up for a full
course load of classes during this time,
and did very well with them for a while..
until a very low point came along and I
got to the point where I couldn't even get
myself to do my homework or try. I feel
like it's all in my head sometimes and
that maybe I'm just lazy and don't want to
do it.. but I know that's not it because I
WANT to go to college and make something
of myself. When I have a "low day" I can't
force myself to get up and do anything and
I cry and cry for no reason. When I start
crying I start thinking about past things
that have happened, like losing my Dad to
cancer when I was 10. Speaking of my Dad,
he was severely bipolar and had to take
medication (lithium? i believe) and my mom
has also been on meds for depression my
entire life. When I was about 14 I was on
Paxil for a while.. but went off of it
about a year later. I really don't even
remember much about the time I was on it.
My thoughts race at times and I can't
concentrate on anything. Sometimes when I
get upset I stare, blankly. I've
contemplated suicide, more recently, when
I've had an all day crying spell... but at
the same time I think to myself that that
is a ridiculous idea. I know I would never
do that. I'm really paranoid sometimes..
I'm scared to drive. I have thoughts in my
head of car accidents a lot when I'm in
the car.. and I've always had very vivid
dreams of dieing in a car accident. I have
panic attacks at times when I get upset
about school or money and how I can't keep
up with school and I don't know why I
can't just do the things I want to do.
I'll have a night, like last night, where
I'll be extremely happy and want to do
everything. I cleaned the entire bathroom,
made dinner for my boyfriends family, etc.
I was dancing around and just really
happy. Today, I could barely get out of
bed and I could not bring myself to work
on my school work. I've been missing class
a lot.. and I only have two now because I
had to drop some. I'm signing up for next
semester and I really am not sure that I
should.. because I'm afraid this will
happen again.
I'm not sure if I'm bipolar or not.. I
don't think I can do things like fly off
of buildings.. and I don't go into rages
at people for no reason (I've read
symptoms like that). But I have very very
high and low times.. varying from days to
months at times and it's ruining my life.
Sorry this is long.. I just needed to let
it out and see what other people think..
my friends don't understand.. my boyfriend
barely gets it.. and I'm 800 miles from my
Mom.. the only one who does understand.
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MandMs
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 26 Jan 2007 Posts: 2300 Location: Strumica, Macedonia
Thanks: 48
Thanked:11
Posted: 11-16-07 06:12am
For how long you are experiencing these
mood swings?
Have you talk with a doctor already?
Do you take some meds?
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xosteph
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Nov 2007 Posts: 4
Posted: 11-17-07 00:31am
I've experienced them for quite a long
time now. I didn't really know that's what
it was until recently where I've started
experiencing the ups and downs so often
and it was more obvious that I wasn't
just.. pmsing or .. whatever. I look back
on the past few years.. and I'm like.. how
did I not see this? I would stay up until
all hours of the night, not sleeping,
cleaning the house.. and then going to
sleep and needing to sleep all day and not
wanting to leave the bed for days. And
now, I'm noticing it in my extreme ability
to complete school work.. and then the
complete and total opposite.
I don't take any medication and no I
haven't seen a doctor yet.
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MandMs
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 26 Jan 2007 Posts: 2300 Location: Strumica, Macedonia
Thanks: 48
Thanked:11
Posted: 11-20-07 05:54am
Mild cases of bipolar disorder can often
go undiagnosed, with symptoms being
mistaken for normal mood swings.
People with bipolar disorder actually
spend much more time in a depressive
episode than in a manic episode (time
spent depressed is 2 or 3 times more
common than that spent in a manic state)
and they usually visit the doctor when
they have symptoms of depression rather
than when they have symptoms of mania.
This is one reason that so many people
with bipolar disorder report being
diagnosed first with clinical depression
instead of bipolar disorder: the symptoms
of clinical depression and bipolar
depression can be very similar.
The problem of sleep is an important and
common one in bipolar disorder and may
vary: problems going to sleep, staying
asleep, waking up very early before light
or in the middle of the night, waking up
many times during the night, sleeping
during the day for long periods.
Bipolar disorder results from interactions
of genes and the environment.
Have you noticed what usually triggers
your symptoms?
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xosteph
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Nov 2007 Posts: 4
Posted: 11-20-07 22:29pm
I'm not really sure what triggers them. I
get really easily depressed and just sort
of shut down at times.. like if I know I
need to get something done I just CAN'T.
But then at other times I'll feel very
productive and accomplish a lot at once.
I've been feeling like I need to sleep a
lot and actually couldn't go to sleep last
night until 2am and woke up today at
2:30pm. I tried to get up earlier but I
just felt like I was parallelized and then
even when I got up I didn't feel rested...
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MandMs
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 26 Jan 2007 Posts: 2300 Location: Strumica, Macedonia
Thanks: 48
Thanked:11
Posted: 11-23-07 06:19am
Can you try not to think about all mood
swings like a medical problem, but as a
part of your character and your age?
You are miles away from your mother,
stressing over your studies and everyday
life.
Try to find a strength to accept some part
of your attitude and a strength to beat
some.
It's normal for you age not to feel sleepy
till late night hours and finding
difficult to wake up early in the
morning.
Don't give yourself unreal (it's not the
right word ) tasks like putting
your alarm to wake you up early in the
morning if you already know that you want
to sleep for longer, because this will
bring you a disappointment. Try to give
yourself reasons to do something because
of other people, too, not only for
yourself. This worked with me. I can
easily do some good and pleasant things
for other people (member of family,
friends), but I'll skip doing it for
myself. There were days when I just didn't
want to go for exams, but I was doing it
just because I knew how was that important
for my mum.
It's normal to have days of low. Accept
this as a way for your body to refilled
with the energy for coming days.
You may try to do some changes in your
lifestyle. Eat healthy and light food
(food that gives you energy, not food that
takes it from you to be dissolved), stop
smoking or drinking too much coffee if you
have them as a habit.
Don't feel disappointed.
It takes years and life experience (having
kids and taking care of them, you wont
have time to think how you feel today) to
learn how to live with mood swings.
) tasks like putting
your alarm to wake you up early in the
morning if you already know that you want
to sleep for longer, because this will
bring you a disappointment. Try to give
yourself reasons to do something because
of other people, too, not only for
yourself. This worked with me. I can
easily do some good and pleasant things
for other people (member of family,
friends), but I'll skip doing it for
myself. There were days when I just didn't
want to go for exams, but I was doing it
just because I knew how was that important
for my mum.
