Well that's fairly normal. How long have you been with the new guy (meaning, how long was there in between relationships?) Did he break it off or you? It seems likely that you don't really want him back, you just are having a hard time understanding how someone who you were previously so close to no longer wants you. Accept it, work through it, and then you will be able to let it go. It doesn't make you a bad girlfriend.

Was the sex w/the ex good? I find that my fantasies and groping were a result of a false belief that sex meant connection ... and are you obsessed? Nah. Just mourning the loss of something that "could have been" (which never will be ).

I'm no expert (duh), but the best advice I have ever recieved when it comes to relationships is that you cannot survive in the "Coulda, shoulda, woulda" world. You will only survive in the world that "is". It is natural to feel the way you do. Just be careful, I've seen relationships go through hell because of this. When you feel this way, it is impossible for you to treat this new person in your life the way he deserves. If you one day loose him, you may find that you now feel this way with him.

I'm sure you've heard it before, "You never know what you've got till it's gone." You can't force love, but just remember that the person who is with you now really cares for you. This guy you keep thinking about, doesn't and he does not deserve your love. I'm not saying what you are doing is wrong or unnatural, just please please please don't what coulda, shoulda, woulda mess up what is.

OK?

Oh yeah, I hate to spoil your fun but wanting him to want you likely make him want you less. You still talk to him, don't you? Bad relationships can be like drugs, don't form bad habits, they are hard to quit and often withdrawal symptoms are present when you do.

I think it's normal to think of someone you just broke up with last year! Maybe it was too soon for the new relationship? I have friends who are married but stink are hung up on guys they dated 15 years ago! I don't think that love will ever go away!
It's TOTALLY normal - don't feel guilty.