so i have been bulimic on and off for around 5 years now. but recently since i moved out of my moms house in with another relative, who used to be and still is abusive to me, i have been ragged on about my weight constantly every day.

so for the past 4-5 months i have been constantly bulimic again.
ive lost a little over 40 pounds.
and i was so proud, i wasnt feeling any effects so far

but today i woke up and my heart was hurting really bad but it hought it just might be gas or something , and i had my normal 60 calorie breakfast special k bar

and then i ate chinese food...and went to go purge, and i did butmostly water came out, barely any of the food i ate came out whatsoever

so i felt very faint, and i layed in bed and my heart started racing and getting tingly. and i have constant diareah today, my chest hurts and i feel so weak and im having a panick attack
i feel like im dying

i dont know what to do
i really need help
i hate this disease
i want help please