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Verizon-y

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the True Right to Life Movement
Posted: 11-03-07 13:40pm

This website is called "The True Right to Life Movement".

Here is an excerpt:
"Evidently, as we now know, there is no "moment of conception." The ovum is just as alive before it is fertilized as it is after, and who could deny that sperm are alive and behave purposefully? Does not the ripe, gravid ovum, coursing its way down the fallopian tube, actively emitting chemical signals in the hope of attracting sperm, have a potential for becoming human? Does not the sperm, in their multitudes, swimming vigorously by the hour in their quest to impregnate an ovum, also have a potential to become human?

The destiny of each depends upon the other, but that does not lessen their potential for becoming a human being. Each carries half of the instructions for making a unique human being. Each are genetically unique beings and when the two become one, we begin our development as multicellular organisms. But our true birth came earlier in the process of gametogenesis when a mature egg emerged from its mature follicle, and when sperm emerged from their seminiferous tubules to await their turn--their chance for continued life, in the epididymis before completing their maturation en utero. The unfertilized ovum requires a sperm to unite with if it is to continue its life, but then the conceptus requires a womb to realize its potential for life and so on to the infant who needs love and care to survive. Dependence on a precondition does not eliminate potential nor the right to life."

Here are the legal changes they want made to comply with the right to life:


"Among the changes:

For all women during periods of infertility, sexual intercourse (involving ejaculation) is to be avoided and should at other times be concidered obligatory (unless artificial insemination is prefered).

For all fertile men, all acts of extravagnial emission must be prohibited (unless a sperm donation is being made).

All forms of post-gametogenic birth control are to be banned.

Menstrual exudate, which must be presumed to contain an ovum, whether fertilized or not, must be collected and given full funeral rights.

We call upon all right-minded people who truly care about the lives of unborn babies to join us in working tirelessly to promote a true understanding of the pro-life point of view, and to bring about the necessary changes in human values and behavior so that we can all one day live in a truly moral society. We realize that initially the ideas we present may seem radical, but please keep an open mind and read our FAQ section for greater clarification of our views."
http://www.alysion .org/truelife/truelife.html
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Rodge

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Posted: 11-03-07 13:52pm

LOLWUT. I utterly refuse to hold a funeral for my tampons.
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Verizon-y

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Posted: 11-03-07 13:53pm

Then you can just rot in jail!!!
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Rodge

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Posted: 11-03-07 13:56pm

Look at the T-shirts. They are the greatest thing the world has ever seen. Laughing
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young Girl

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Posted: 11-03-07 13:58pm

im sorry i just spit out my lemonade imajining a tampon in a tiny coffin
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young Girl

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Posted: 11-03-07 14:09pm

has anyone herd of UMBERT?
i thought this was great!!!

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Rodge

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Posted: 11-03-07 14:17pm

the_girlfriend wrote:
im sorry i just spit out my lemonade imajining a tampon in a tiny coffin

Would you have to name them all, do you think, or could you get away with 'Tampon 1', 'Tampon 2' and so on?
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Rodge

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Posted: 11-03-07 14:20pm

omg. You guys, look at this:
Q: What if I'm on vacation in a remote area and I'm going to ovulate in four days, I don't have any birth control pills, and I can't get any semen from a sperm bank? I know it wouldn't be ethical to seduce the tour guide without telling him why, but rather than condemn my egg to certain death, wouldn't I be justified in committing the lesser evil?

A: Well, in your hypothetical case, it would be too late to advise you to plan ahead. Hypothetically, since none of our members would be so irresponsible, problems like this would never come up Smile, but let's say a situation like this did arise. What you have just discovered is known as an ethical dilemma, and they're not called dilemmas for nothing. Sometimes there may not seem to be any way out, but you should assume that if you can be creative enough, you can find a way out. But if you can't, honesty remains the best policy. What would be wrong with just telling the guide, or any other men you come across, what your situation is and asking for a donation? But then you're going to ask, "But what if I'm thrown into an all women's prison?" The sad truth is that life is trouble, sometimes you'll just have to mourn your losses the best you can.


This is hilarious.
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Marianne0558

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Posted: 11-03-07 14:35pm

OMG!!! My 120 periods through my life.... I must have wasted about 1200 tampons!! Holy Moley! That's a lot of funerals.

I gotta name them now...
Bob
Peanut
Bloody Mary
Captain Snatch
Petey
Margarita
Bud

Crap, I still need 1193 more names and headstones... and caskets.
Who the hell wrote that nonsense? Looney bin!! Hello!!!


I belong in jail!!!

Poor baby tampons!
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msrosie

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Posted: 11-03-07 15:44pm

Are these people for real or is this satire? I hope the latter, the former is very scary indeed.

Quote:
I utterly refuse to hold a funeral for my tampons.


Hmmmm......I wonder if my dog is a mvrderer since she once got into the bathroom garbage and ate a few of them? Razz Eeeeeeeeeeeeeew, I know. I was utterly disgusted with her lol.

BTW, does anyone know how to get rid of the </tr> codes that appear between paragraphs?
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Birch

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Posted: 11-03-07 17:45pm

Oh, it's most certainly a joke...

From the "About Us" page:

"Humanity has been burdened too long by the unconscious guilt that arises from the profligate wasting of their gametes. Until the slaughter of innocent gametes ceases, our collective guilt will never be assuaged. When we know that all of our gametic offspring are being given every chance to fulfill their quest to become human, then we will know true liberation from the oppressive weight of our shameful history of sexual dissipation. So for your sake, for humanity's sake, and for the sake of your unborn gametes, we urge you to accept your moral responsibilities, to live up to the truth, so that you may know fearlessness, and you too may know love."
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Verizon-y

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Posted: 11-04-07 02:09am

I hope you guys are getting this.

The message is, if you are crazy enough to value a fertilized egg as much as you do a born child, then in order to be logical and not hypocritical, you must also feel the same for eggs and sperm as you do for fertilized eggs, embryos and fetuses.
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Katrinadoodle

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Posted: 11-04-07 05:08am

LOVE IT.
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Gu£st

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Posted: 11-04-07 05:13am

It is obviously pro choice people posing as pro life people in order to undermine the pro life reveloution.
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Rodge

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Posted: 11-04-07 06:13am

It's 'revolution', buddy.

You have to admit, it's hilarious. Look at the T-shirts! Laughing
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young Girl

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Posted: 11-04-07 11:17am

adrienne you REALLY want one of those T shirts dont you!
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Rodge

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Posted: 11-04-07 12:58pm

It is all I want for Christmas. Laughing

They're just so tacky and badly made! I love them.
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Verizon-y

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Posted: 11-05-07 12:51pm

*rushes off to check out and possibly order the t shirts!*
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meblonde01

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Posted: 11-05-07 13:01pm

futureshock wrote:
I hope you guys are getting this.

The message is, if you are crazy enough to value a fertilized egg as much as you do a born child, then in order to be logical and not hypocritical, you must also feel the same for eggs and sperm as you do for fertilized eggs, embryos and fetuses.


correct.. BUT the two have to come together before life is started. That is the difference for a egg and spem.. They are nothing without the other.. Big diff..
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Verizon-y

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Posted: 11-05-07 13:12pm

WHY are they nothing without the other? Why is the zygote anything MORE than the egg and sperm? The zygote by itself is NOTHING without a womb and until 9 months of complicated and near miraculous processes are carried out by the mother's body.
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