Should I Stay Or Should I Leave.... Posted: 11-02-07 12:34pm
heyy.
i need some help because i have been with
my boyfriend for lyk 2 years now,and at
the begin of the relationship,he was
awesome,loving me and everything was
perfect(im 16 by the way,he`s 1.im am sooooo inlove
with him some times i feel that if he
leaves me i`ll die!!,but now he has NOOOO!
respect for me just yesterday he got mad
at me and he told me"go suck my D**K
bi*ch".and all i can do is cry because i
love him so much and it hurts me so
bad.when me and him are on the phone ,he
tells me how he is gonna go back to his
ex.girlfriend,and some times he even asks
for my family members phone numbers,and he
tells me to ask them things like"can he
f**k them!" and when he gets mad at me
because i wont give him oval sex,he tells
everybody that he`s not my boyfriend that
we are best friends.but when it is no one
but me and him he is the sweetess things
he holds me,and kiss me while slow music
is playing,and tells me he loves me and
the whole 9 yards.but its when ppl come
around that he embarasses me... so i wanna
stay but everybody tells me to leave,i
dont know what to do please help!!
|
young Girl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 13932 Location: everythings better in, texas USA
Thanks: 1
Thanked:0
Posted: 11-02-07 12:43pm
he doesnt care about you
and if you stay
then your crazy
dont be weak
get out of there
|
very-confused
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 Oct 2007 Posts: 38 Location: ,
Posted: 11-02-07 12:55pm
i feel like i cant live with out him.this
thing has goin from love to obsession.if i
walk away from him.ill never forgive
myself,ill b living on what ifs.. he`s all
i think about 24/7 his on my mind.
|
young Girl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 13932 Location: everythings better in, texas USA
Thanks: 1
Thanked:0
Posted: 11-02-07 12:58pm
but your in love with your cousin?\
:/
|
Rosie H
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Jun 2007 Posts: 1160 Location: Phoenix, AZ, USA
Thanks: 18
Thanked:9
Posted: 11-02-07 13:03pm
He doesnt respect you. Whether its only
you two or around his friends he needs to
respect you. You deserve much better and
there are men out there that treat their
women good and appreciate them. The whole
thing just sounds like he is too immature
for you.
Your young and you will have many loves in
your life. Some will be bad and others
will sweep you away. You dont need
someone bringing you down, Good luck and
remember you are #1, only you can change
the situation cause it sounds like he not
anytime soon......
|
very-confused
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 Oct 2007 Posts: 38 Location: ,
Posted: 11-02-07 13:07pm
the thing with my cousin is something from
my childhood on up till now.but dont get
me wrong i still love my boyfriend.
|
love_pinkish
Supporter
Joined: 03 May 2007 Posts: 731 Location: Sulphur, LA USA
Thanks: 6
Thanked:17
Posted: 11-02-07 13:17pm
leave him and your cousin alone!! You are
wasting you time, if that means anything
to you.
|
young Girl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 13932 Location: everythings better in, texas USA
Thanks: 1
Thanked:0
Posted: 11-02-07 13:18pm
itsme0606
wrote:
leave him and your cousin
alone!! You are wasting you time, if that
means anything to
you.
i agree
|
very-confused
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 Oct 2007 Posts: 38 Location: ,
Posted: 11-02-07 13:22pm
but you never had it were you can`t
picture how your life would be with out
that person???
|
Mabel
Supporter
Joined: 09 Mar 2006 Posts: 8947 Location: Grinning like a Cheshire Cat,
Thanks: 179
Thanked:198
Posted: 11-02-07 13:22pm
Why aren't you in school?
|
young Girl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 13932 Location: everythings better in, texas USA
Thanks: 1
Thanked:0
Posted: 11-02-07 13:23pm
very-confused
wrote:
but you never had it were
you can`t picture how your life would be
with out that
person???
yes i have
have you had it where you can picture
being sad with that erson and abused and
have to live with an abusive jerk that
pushes you around and treats you like
crap
because ive done that too
|
very-confused
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 Oct 2007 Posts: 38 Location: ,
Posted: 11-02-07 13:23pm
i am in school. on fridays this is what we
do.
|
Mabel
Supporter
Joined: 09 Mar 2006 Posts: 8947 Location: Grinning like a Cheshire Cat,
Thanks: 179
Thanked:198
Posted: 11-02-07 13:25pm
very-confused
wrote:
i am in school. on fridays
this is what we
do.
On Fridays you sit in the computer lab and
write on message boards? Sounds like a
great education.
|
very-confused
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 Oct 2007 Posts: 38 Location: ,
Posted: 11-02-07 13:27pm
but he does not put his hands on me.but
emotionally yea he pushes me around,i know
he does what he does because he feels in
his heart that no matter what he says to
me.im not going no where.but thats not
really true.he told me that im his forever
and that im not going no where.and im kind
of scared of what he may do if i leave....
|
Mikolas
Supporter
Joined: 02 Aug 2007 Posts: 617 Location: Buffalo University, Hands off! My trained killer kitten has its aim set upon you!
Thanks: 19
Thanked:1
Posted: 11-02-07 13:27pm
Blah what a waste of a young lady -_-. You
can do better then that. Let me tell you
something, EVERY (ok not every, but quite
close enough), most girls who have been in
a close relationship at least once have at
least felt the same thing you did. Where
they just cannot believe they can move on
and he is the only one for them. Bull.
Simple bull. There would be hundreds of
millions more depressed women in this
world if they never moved on from their
first love. Bluntly and somewhat harshly
speaking (sorry, I'm not gonna be too
sentimental sounding because I have a test
tomorrow on a saterday!!!) Attachment is a
blindness, that is all, whether or not it
is directed to somebody worth it, it does
not matter, it still creates this barrier
between your instincts/intelligence and
the heart. These are the kind of cases
where you should NOT let your heart and
emotions get to the matter, take a deep
breath and think things through with your
brain.
If he really is like this, he will ditch
you inevitably. Or, he will wed you and
abuse you for the rest of your life. Are
either of these what you desire? If not,
hopefully not, you will move on. But I
have a feeling you won't, as many of my
girl friends did not and continued to feed
so much energy into their undeserving man,
which they all came out heartbroken anyway
since the guy left them anyway.
So what I mean is this:
1. Either you try to cling on and stick
with him, take more mental abuse, begin to
crumble and have your mind shaped into
thinking bad about yourself (low self
esteem is common), and then he will leave
you, leaving you more crumbled, with a
twisted mentality due to the pain, and
taking months if not years to heal.
Meaning you have spent many
hours/days/months/years trying to cling on
for nothing and you will be in even more
unbearable pain.
2. Or you think rationally, look at his
personality and see if he can change (use
your brain, do not let hope blind you and
go "i think he can really change for
me!"), if he cannot, move on, take your
time licking your wounds and heal, which
may also be months or years, but you will
be far less damaged mentally and have
saved time.
If you take option 2. I guarantee that
once you have gotten over him (which you
will unless you decided to become a hermit
and posted pictures of him everywhere from
the ceiling to the toilet paper), you will
be much happier knowing that you did not
stick with something that you would
regret. If you take option 1, I cannot say
if you will ever recover from a
potentially traumatic ordeal, but if you
have healed after some time, you are going
to go "jeez why the heck did I spend so
much time on this guy, I could have used
all that time I wasted being depressed to
better myself or catch up with friends or
maybe found a better boyfriend, or etc,
etc, etc.
Sorry if I seem harsh, I kind of say this
without emotion because I feel like a tape
recorder saying this to my girl friends
over and over and over and over again.
They rarely listen and go "yea i know...
but" because they let their emotions get
to them, I always hear "I'll give him one
more chance". Each and every day, their
hearts get ripped a piece to a piece till
all I get to see is them crying or with a
fake smile telling me they are ok =(.
Don't let that happen to you, it saddens
me seeing my friends going through the
same things, nobody should deal with such
pain in a relationship.
Be among the wise!
Last edited by Mikolas on 11-02-07 13:29pm; edited 1 time in total
|
very-confused
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 Oct 2007 Posts: 38 Location: ,
Posted: 11-02-07 13:28pm
Ingi
wrote:
very-confused
wrote:
i am in school. on fridays
this is what we
do.
On Fridays you sit in the computer lab and
write on message boards? Sounds like a
great education.
and what do you think we do during the
week genius??
|
Mabel
Supporter
Joined: 09 Mar 2006 Posts: 8947 Location: Grinning like a Cheshire Cat,
Thanks: 179
Thanked:198
Posted: 11-02-07 13:31pm
very-confused
wrote:
Ingi
wrote:
very-confused
wrote:
i am in school. on fridays
this is what we
do.
On Fridays you sit in the computer lab and
write on message boards? Sounds like a
great education.
and what do you think we do during the
week genius??
Wow. No need to get testy little missy.
I'm not going to listen to your drivel
about how your boyfriend wants you to have
his baby then treats you like dog meat the
next minute. But, oh, by the way, you are
also in love with your hot, hot cousin.
You need more than a message board to
solve your issues. You need a mental
health professional.
|
very-confused
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 Oct 2007 Posts: 38 Location: ,
Posted: 11-02-07 13:32pm
thanks for the advice mikolas
|
very-confused
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 Oct 2007 Posts: 38 Location: ,
Posted: 11-02-07 13:34pm
i only need a mental health professional
if i take advice from an airhead like you.
|
Mabel
Supporter
Joined: 09 Mar 2006 Posts: 8947 Location: Grinning like a Cheshire Cat,