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Debate Forums > Abortion Debate Forum > What Is the Male Pro-lifer's Responsibility? (Page 1)
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Q: What Is the Male Pro-lifer's Responsibility?
asked by: Tylanas on October 29th, 2007
Especially eHealthy
If you are male and pro-life, and your girl is pro-choice, then in my opinion if you want to prevent your girl from aborting don't get her pregnant. Use pills, condoms and a spermicide. Your girl doesn't want to get pregnant either, but she knows she has the right to control her body if it happens.

As a male, you absolutely do not have any right to tell her what to do with her body. If you want control over abortion, then do it by preventing it. Do not take chances. If you don't trust condoms, pills and spermicide, then abstain.

Do not ignorantly get a girl pregnant and then whine about how she can't make the choice to kill "your baby". You should have worn a condom, period.
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Phant Ears
replied on October 29th, 2007
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agreed.
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Verizon-y
replied on October 29th, 2007
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I would never date a pro-life male. They inherently see women as second class citizens.

*sigh*

I know some of you won't get this, so here is the spoon feeding some of you need:

1) All people, men and women, have the right to control their own bodies.
2) Pro-life men want to take away the right of all women to control their own bodies.
3. This would leave men and embryos with more rights than women.
4. If one group of citizens has more rights than another, the one with less rights is SECOND CLASS because of that.
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Sandbox Party
replied on October 30th, 2007
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my DH is prolife and is great when it comes to woman having equal rights.
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meblonde01
replied on October 30th, 2007
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Sandy_Pants wrote:
my DH is prolife and is great when it comes to woman having equal rights.


Good! it's nice to hear as in everything there are exceptions to all rules.. Smile You changed your name....
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msrosie
replied on October 30th, 2007
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I agree, Eiri. It amazes me the number of men who complain when their partner gets an abortion - or even when they carry to term and then hit them up for support - but they didn't wear a condom or even discuss what would happen in the event of pregnancy BEFORE they dropped their pants. I do feel for the men who were deceived ie. the woman said she'd carry or abort, then changed her mind once pregnant. However, I think those are the minority. If a man does not want to be a father, or does not want his partner to abort should she conceive, it behooves him to wrap it up before playing hide the weenie with her.
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Verizon-y
replied on October 30th, 2007
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Sandy_Pants wrote:
my DH is prolife and is great when it comes to woman having equal rights.


Then I guess we have a different definition of pro-life. My definition means that he wants to make abortion illegal.



pro-life

–adjective
opposed to legalized abortion
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Georgia59
replied on October 30th, 2007
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I just think it's something that needs to be discussed before sex, and if you really disagree, maybe you shouldn't be having sex. Or you could find yourself in a pretty bad situation.

Of course that's not always gonna happen, one night stands don't start with "What are your views on abortion?"
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Verizon-y
replied on October 30th, 2007
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I agree with you on both counts, Georgia!
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Verizon-y
replied on October 30th, 2007
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Most women who are pro-choice have children or will eventually. Get an education. You have nothing but propaganda between your ears. I can tell this just from reading your posts.
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lucy315
replied on October 30th, 2007
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16 father wrote:
Well pro life men you heard it, don't date ignorant pro choice women.


Why do you assume all pro-choice woman are ignorant? I'm pro-choice and my boyfriend is pro-life. We have a great relationship.

Quote:
Eventually pro life people will have children and pro choice will die out. ha ha .


Only pro-lifers have children? My mom is pro-choice, and had 3 kids. Are you forgetting that pro-choicers also support pregnancy, birth, and adoption?


Quote:
Fathers should have (and morally have) the same right to their children as mothers do


How do you figure? Are you going to carry the child in your body for 9 months? Are you going to give birth? The father should definitely have an opinion in the matter (and hopefully the couple will make the decision together) but in the end, it's up to the woman carrying the child.
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Verizon-y
replied on October 31st, 2007
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The reason abortion doesn't effect population rates is that the vast majority of women who have abortions go on to have children later in life. In other words, they have the same amount of children they would have had whether there was such a thing as abortion or not.

If they hadn't aborted when they were younger, all of the children they eventually had would never have been born. Do those children have a lesser right to life than the aborted embryos?
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Tylanas
replied on October 31st, 2007
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futureshock wrote:
The reason abortion doesn't effect population rates is that the vast majority of women who have abortions go on to have children later in life. In other words, they have the same amount of children they would have had whether there was such a thing as abortion or not.

If they hadn't aborted when they were younger, all of the children they eventually had would never have been born. Do those children have a lesser right to life than the aborted embryos?


My brother and I wouldn't exist if my mother hadn't aborted. I guess we don't matter, eh?
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Kypros
replied on October 31st, 2007
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Re: What Is the Male Pro-lifer's Responsibility?
Eiri wrote:
If you are male and pro-life, and your girl is pro-choice, then in my opinion if you want to prevent your girl from aborting don't get her pregnant. Use pills, condoms and a spermicide. Your girl doesn't want to get pregnant either, but she knows she has the right to control her body if it happens.

As a male, you absolutely do not have any right to tell her what to do with her body. If you want control over abortion, then do it by preventing it. Do not take chances. If you don't trust condoms, pills and spermicide, then abstain.

Do not ignorantly get a girl pregnant and then whine about how she can't make the choice to kill "your baby". You should have worn a condom, period.


Good points, Eiri, but you are neglecting to mention the exceptions. As we already know, measures taken to prevent pregnancy are overwhelmingly, but not absolutely reliable. So, supposing the pro-life male has tried his best to prevent pregnancy but unfortunately his pro-choice partner has fallen pregnant and decided to terminate, what are his rights (if any)? Personally, I would applaud such a man for trying his best and being very reliable a) to try and prevent a pregnancy when neither he nor his partner want this and b) for taking the necessary and conscientious measures to deter a condition whose result is very divisive between him and his partner. However, I am pro-choice, and the final decision must always fall in the hands of the pregnant women; nevertheless, I ardently encourage that the woman discuss options with her partner (regardless of his beliefs) in the hope that, whatever the final decision, it is a joint one.

Anyway, back to the discussion, I do feel sympathy for all men who cannot act on the decision of their pregnant partner, and my advice to any pro-life man who has done his best to prevent the pregnancy is purely to get across his viewpoint and try his best to dissuade his partner from aborting. He must recognise thought that while he has every right to put across his ideas, he must respect the notion that he cannot force her into her choice and if he would rather split up with her because he views her as a 'merciless killer', that's his choice Very Happy.
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Tylanas
replied on October 31st, 2007
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What are his rights? None. He can advise, he can talk. He can be a back-handed fool if he wants and try to blackmail her into gestating. But as far as laws go, he has NO right to FORCE her to gestate.

I think most pro-choice women would certainly be willing to talk with their partner and work out a deal together especially if care was taken towards protection. I have no problem with that.

I still find a man sick if he dumps his pregnant girlfriend simply because she is going to exercise the right to control her own body.
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Kypros
replied on November 2nd, 2007
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I didn't mean to say he has any legal rights; rather, he has the freedom to do anything (i.e. express his views, encourage her with all his might to change her mind and keep the baby, tell his lover she's killing an innocent child) but force her into something against her will. I don't feel that men should have the right to control a woman's body, regardlss of whether the baby is his.

I do find it overtly bigoted of you, however, to say that you find it "sick" if a man dumps his girlfriend because she chooses an abortion. If you are somehow refusing to respect the man's right to exercise his own pro-life opinions, how can you demand that a man respect his partner pro-choice decisions? This is a hypocritical double standard - the male shouldn't have to forgive what he perceives to be child homicide just as a woman shouldn't have to forgive her partner because he has forced her into birth. Between a couple there must always be a freedom of expression of stances fundamentally without forcing one partner with no option but to carry out the preferences of the other. If they are unable to be content enough with the partner's decision to love them again it is their right not to forgive and forget. I completely back pro-lifers' rights to ditch a partner who has terminated an innocent human life just as i condone pro-choicers' rights to leave a man who has coerced them into an action against their will.
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16 father
replied on November 2nd, 2007
Experienced User
I apologize if my sarcasm of the dying out of pro-choices was misinterpreted by some of you.

However, I do believe pro-life men shouldn't date pro-choice women, if then intend to abort if they become pregnant. She won't get pregnant or have him as a boyfriend, everyone is happy.
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Verizon-y
replied on November 2nd, 2007
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Agreed.
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lucy315
replied on November 2nd, 2007
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16 father wrote:

However, I do believe pro-life men shouldn't date pro-choice women, if then intend to abort if they become pregnant. She won't get pregnant or have him as a boyfriend, everyone is happy.


I do agree with you in some situations. I mentioned that my boyfriend is pro-life and I am pro-choice. When I decided to have an abortion (it was his) he was not happy, but never once threatened to leave me. We had some serious talks about it, and he realized that he loved me too much to let the situation break us apart. He even went with me to the clinic, knowing that in the end, although he can have an opinion, that it was my body and my choice.
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Jincks013
replied on November 2nd, 2007
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Lemme spell it out for you 16; if and when you get pregnant you can make all the decisions you want about gestation; in the mean time why don't you leave that choice to the sex that actually gestates.. no the 7/10 of one second it takes for fertilization to occure does not actually constitute gestating..
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