Womens Chat Forum - Miss My Baby

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Q: Miss My Baby

asked by: tish-625 on October 23rd, 2007

New User

I cant have any more kids.
Had a hysterectomy 11 years ago after my son was born,we have two kids 14,11 years.
need some opinions
my cousin is bipolar and has depression. she left her son with my mom when he was 3 months.
then she left her daughter with my husband an I when she was three months and only saw her 3 times during that time. she didnt bring us milk or clothes but about one time. her mother wont help her with the kids. my cousin caused some problems with my mother.and we didnt want any part of those problems so we decided to give the baby back to her. I dont know if that was the right decision. we dont think that she is doing right by those kid. child protective services came out but she lied and nothing was done. I miss the baby terribly but i dont want to get caught in that agian. what do you think that i should do?

Replies(19)

pogo

replied on October 23rd, 2007

Experienced User

Go try and see your cousin and the baby to see how they are doing.Ask if you can spend sometime with the baby.Good Luck

Tylanas

replied on October 23rd, 2007

Especially eHealthy

I'd call child services again, or ask your cousin if you could watch the baby yourselves again. Getting caught up may suck, but of you care for this child's life and you think it's important, then I think you should get involved.

Sandbox Party

replied on October 23rd, 2007

Especially eHealthy

petition the court for custody if u have proof that shes a bad mom.

tish-625

replied on October 24th, 2007

New User

what if my husband is so mad a her because of the dumb things that she does and says. how do you think that i should talk to him about this.

Tylanas

replied on October 24th, 2007

Especially eHealthy

I think your husband sounds like he is on your side and I think he'd definitely want to get the child out of that bad situation. Just simply tell him what you want to do.

tish-625

replied on October 24th, 2007

New User

but we have been the spot where we do all the work by taking the baby to the dr. and get coght up on the shots and cloth and feed her. but we get no credit. she comes to get her for the holidays and acts like she has been the on to take care the baby all this time. I know that sounds bad like i want someone to pat me on the back but that is not it. i just want her to stop lying when it comes to the baby.and where is the best place for the baby.

Marianne0558

replied on October 24th, 2007

Supporter

Obviously not with her.
If she's an unfit mother, you could easily petition for guardianship. My sister did so with her little brother-in-law.
And you can get a court order for child support

tish-625

replied on October 24th, 2007

New User

my aunt would fight all the way even though she wont help. at on time cps gave the kids to her because my cousin had to be put in a mental hospital for a couple of days a as soon a she got out she sent them right back to her.even though my cousin said she couldnt handle all the kids. I just dont know the best way to handle this.

Marianne0558

replied on October 24th, 2007

Supporter

You could easily bring that up in court...about how the aunt is giving her the kids back...
If the kids are in danger, you should act.
That's what you do when you love someone.

tish-625

replied on October 24th, 2007

New User

there is no dought that she loves the kids and that they are not in any life or death danger for the most part. but with her you never know if she is lieing or not in some of the things she tells us, even if she looks stupid. but I dont think that she thinks she is doing anything wrong. and if she would want to leave the baby with me then her mom would have a fit. Do you think I am making a bigger deal out of this than need be? I dont know. all I know that i miss the baby and I don't know what is best for everyone.

Marianne0558

replied on October 24th, 2007

Supporter

Ask her if you can visit the baby. Then, if you notice something still isn't right, call child protection. They can't just rely on what she says

tish-625

replied on October 24th, 2007

New User

thanks, I never thought about it that way. I am going to talk to my husband about maybee going to get her sometime. Do you think everyother weekend would be good.

Marianne0558

replied on October 24th, 2007

Supporter

At first, I would try to visit at her house. This way, you can personally take a look at what kind of conditions the baby lives in. You could even snap a few pictures if it's a total wreck to further prove your point in court (possibly one day).
You need to have proof if you ever want to have guardianship.
After visiting her house a couple of times, ask if you could possible "give her a break and take the baby overnight." You have to put it in terms that won't threaten her.

tish-625

replied on October 24th, 2007

New User

I dont think it would threaten her at all. at first she told me to take the baby and she would give me her birth certificate because she cant handle all the kids. i said ok what about the father she said i don't care what he says.(he is in jail now).

Marianne0558

replied on October 24th, 2007

Supporter

What changed? She wouldn't be willing to do that still?

tish-625

replied on October 24th, 2007

New User

I got tired of being used, well thats what it felt like. we did all of the hard work dr.s milk, clothes, waking up nights and then she came on thanksgiving and christmas and took her out of town with her parents and acted as if she was the one taking care of the baby and it didnt matter what we had planed.

Marianne0558

replied on October 24th, 2007

Supporter

Well, some people are just selfish like that.
Try visiting her at her home a few times. Like I said, take pictures if necessary.
Then offer to take her overnight...
It's kind of a snowball effect.
If you are worried, you need to take some kind of action.
If you just miss her, go see her Wink

tish-625

replied on October 24th, 2007

New User

thanks

Marianne0558

replied on October 24th, 2007

Supporter

No problem! I hope everything works out for the sake of the baby-not just you!
Keep us updated Wink

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