What she's saying is that not all women have "cherries to pop" therefore its not means to define purity or virginity.

If you want to base your opinion off anything concerning virginity it shouldn't be the hymen.

I understand what she was saying and I agree that not all women have cherries to pop. I replied to her ad based off my personal experience, but I did say "if he didn't go in all the way" then she is still a virgin. But if I wanted to base my opinion off of the hymen than I have every right to do so, as do you.

MOST women don't have hymens by the time they have sex. Yes, some do. But there's this whole idea about what a woman is supposed to be like the first time she has sex is very damaging. The story goes like this: "I was about to have sex for the first time and I was very scared because I knew it would hurt- he shoved his large throbbing penis in me and I was so tight and dry he really had to jamb it in there and break my hymen and I bled all over, but I just layed still and took it because that's what it's supposed to be like. Too bad I'll never enjoy sex."

I know that's not what you were saying, but this is the type of thing we have to try combat on here every day. Men come in asking if their formerly virginal wives cheated on them because they weren't tight enough, or because they didn't bleed all over, or they enjoyed themselves too much. That's why they jumped on you about it, because we really need to stop spreading this attitude so women can enjoy sex and not expect their first time to be so awful (because it doesn't have to be and it isn't for MOST women!)

I understand that was your experience and I respect that. But that doesn't mean it is usually that way.

Virginity is defined in many different ways, and you can define it how you want according to your personal beliefs.

First, I never said that it was my experience. I simply stated that in my sitauation, I did have my hymen break, and I did bleed. I didn't bleed all over people, but I did bleed non-the-less. Every woman is different. I happened to have enjoyed having sex for the first time, and I never stated that it was painful for me. I'm sorry that you all have to feel like attacking someone else opinion makes you think that you'll be able to stop women from thinking that sex is painful, but the fact of the matter is that every woman is different, and you people cannot deny that the hymen DOES exist and it CAN break during intercourse, and it CAN also be painful. Not that it WILL be. I know plenty of other women have had pain during the first time with intercourse and I think it is upsurd to make people believe that it is just going to be 100% fine and dandy. That's how you end up with people thinking that they have issues because it was painful for their first time, or because they bled the first time. It's completely natural. Respect the fact that I am stating my opnion and stop trying to change people's minds about what sex is "supposed" to be like.

no one ever denied that it could happen. It's just not normal.

This was misinformation because most women don't feel any "popping" of their cherry and therefore it's not a good measure of virginity. That's all.

Thanks for your answer though, and it was nice to hear your experience. I'm glad you aren't one of the "sex sucks" kind of women.

Different people have different opinions on this, and some say there are different types of virginity. But most people generally agree that if a man has had penetrative sex with a woman then he (or she) is no longer a virgin.

no thats untrue
so if a girl is raped shes not a virgin anymore?

Haha! good point! I hate trolls

my opinion kind of sucks and probably doesn't count, but i think that if a girl IS raped she is not a virgin. It's not like it's her fault, but she is not one anymore.

but i could be wrong. so who knows.

Why? Why do you believe she is no longer a virgin? I'm curious.

yeah we hate you too

ivy and catjack so which name do you perfer hmmm i think troll fits

i think if a girl is raped she is not a virgin. She has had sex, even though it was unwanted but she had sex. Maybe her mind is still a virgin, but her body isn't If that makes any sense

Guys, Catjack's IP only has one registered user, so I doubt Ivy is her.

no its her alter bridgette busted her earlier today. check it again they are 1 and the same eiri

Did she just add this other name or something? Or is it through a rotating IP?

well i think she is not a virgin because what is YOUR definition of non-virgin/ virgin?

i really dont mean to be argumentative.

If you could define your concept of virginity that would help.

Personally, losing one's virginity is a voluntary thing. You must voluntarily have completely penetrative vagina sex (for women) in order to no longer be a virgin. Rape does not de-virginize you. Sticking the head of the penis in for a second does not de-virginize you. Why? Because in neither situation did you actually have SEX. In rape, that's not sex. That's physical domination involving a penis and a vagina. YOU, the victim, are clearly not participating in sex. You are having rape DONE to you. It is one sided. In case two, there was not full penetration, so clearly, they didn't have actual sex.

oh, i guess my definition was more along the lines of "medical" virginity. BUT, i guess that wouldn't make sense for the girls who don't have a hymen.

Virginity is a very loose opinion, is it not? I always thought losing your virginity just had to do with penetration of the vagina by a penis.

But i guess i am proved wrong because not every girl has a hymen!