Joined: 17 Feb 2007 Posts: 26 Location: Delray Beach, FL US
Heroine Addicts In Macedonia Posted: 10-13-07 12:18pm
Hey guys,
Here is the situation my childhood friend
got into heroine about 12 years ago, he
lives in a country where the rehab / NA /
AA scene is almost inexistent. He's
married and has 2 kids, he's wife is also
an active heroine addict. They both live
at his mother's place, she is the one that
has been taking care of the kids.
Surprisingly they are both involve for now
7 years in the first methadone program
ever developed in this country, she's
employed as a counselor in the
organization and he's the most active
volunteer.
I have no doubt that they both have tried
to get clean as some point, but lately
it's been very difficult for his mother.
They are both back spending time at home
fighting in the bathroom over sharing the
dope, or stoning on the couch.
Anyway, I know him and his mother since
I've been born, and I want to try to help.
My first thought is we should try to give
them an ultimatum, ether they quit or they
can't live at his mother's place, the
second thing was about to try to get the
anti drug organization manager to try to
put some pressure as well, you quit or you
lose your job and a couple other scenarios
of the same nature.
I know that chances, are he's going to say
"I'll quit no problem" and maybe try at
best, or just fake it and hope we somehow
we will forget about it or decide to not
follow thru.
I would like to help to improve the
situation, but how realistic is it for
someone to get clean and stay clean in an
environment that is so underdeveloped in
the Addiction treatment and recovery
anyway ? Is it possible at all ? If there
is a model of addiction recovery that
works other than AA, NA and has proven
result ?
Any comments would be most appreciated
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WShep
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Oct 2007 Posts: 67 Location: SoCal, USA
Posted: 10-13-07 12:53pm
This is way over my head, but I do know
about ultimatums in relation to
addiction.
Its important to approach an addict in
such a way that they aren't immediately on
the defensive. I have no words of wisdom
on how to accomplish this. If its time to
go straight at them and not beat around
the bush because they are close to death,
thats one thing! If you feel he/they will
just become defensive and push you away,
try to come up with a strategy that allows
them to open up and not run from you.
Find a way to talk to them without making
them feel you are threatening their stash,
or the lifestyle they protect so
tenaciously. Get your foot in the door
first, get as much information as you can,
decide how severe it really is, then talk
to professionals or people like Shadow on
these forums and make a plan. You want to
help and its time sensitive, but wait as
long as you possibly can until you have a
plan and every scenario has been accounted
for. If they have never opened up to
anyone about their problem and been %100
honest, that itself may be a good place to
start eh?
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dudovic
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Feb 2007 Posts: 26 Location: Delray Beach, FL US
Posted: 10-16-07 03:43am
Thanks for your advise WShep,
I will take my time to research every
options, talk to some professionals and
finally meet him when I'll be ready. I'll
let everyone know how this story is
unfolding as we go through the process.
There is no doubt in my mind that a meth
clinic is needed here for both of them.
But, a strong intervention curcle would
benefit them too. Everyone bottom's out
differently. Some simply will not even
want any intervention on the positive side
so, you have to go to the I will and I can
side. " I will have your kids taken away"
or " I will let everyone know what you are
doing and let them that the reins". A meth
clinic and positive intervention is what I
usually tried to do for my patients. But,
just as a member on another side of this
board, I had to get very aggressive with,
hoping to open up the members head.
Sometimes with an addiction, Mr or Ms
"Nice" does not work.
Carrie
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dudovic
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Feb 2007 Posts: 26 Location: Delray Beach, FL US
Posted: 10-17-07 03:51am
I agree with Carrie, Mr and Mrs nice
doesn't work very often when it come to
addiction . And the "I will have your kids
taken away" and the "" I will let everyone
know.." is part of the tool that I'll use
during the conversation I intend to have
with both of concerned addicts. I am even
going 1 step further, by getting an
appointment with a local DEA officer and
see if in case they refuse to try to stop
using dope what are the legal option. If
for them incarceration is required to hit
a bottom I have no problem with that,
after all we are trying to save their
lives and give a better potential future
to their kids so remorse on that one.
But you are raising an interesting point
by mentioning a strong "Intervention".
This is something that I was planing to do
as a second step in the process after
having an initial conversation, and only
in case if I fail delivering a clear
message.
I don't have experience in 'Interventions"
and I think that many members of the board
could use some suggestion on how to
deliver a good and effective intervention.
I think we should have a topic on
intervention techniques and have people
with experience comment on it.
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MaggieH
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Jun 2007 Posts: 6 Location: TN
Posted: 10-17-07 15:47pm
Hi dudovic,
You indicated in your post that the wife
is active in her using and that she's
employed as a counselor in the
organization and he's the most active
volunteer. I have never heard of a meth
clinic actively employing someone who is
using. Are they aware that she is using?
The mom has become part of the problem she
is taking care of the kids and allowing
them to live there.
If mom is tired she needs to move them
out. As long as mom enables them WHY DO
THEY NEED TO CHANGE? The point is they
wont until mom gets on board and says no
more.
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Fun Time
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 05 Dec 2007 Posts: 5
the Answer to Your Prayers Is Suboxone!!!!!!!!!!!! Posted: 12-05-07 09:20am
Do some research on Suboxone (sub-ox-in)
It is an opiate replacement drug - You do
not get withdrawls, and yo do not feel
like you are quiting! But you have to WANT
to stop. If you dont want to stop you
wont! But if you do, and you use suboxone,
you will be clean in 3 days, and with
continued treatment, permanantly. I know
from experience!
