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October 13th, 2007
Hello, I'm 18 years old and I really love a lot a girl we've shared lots of things together in college and outside of it, we've kissed once(before she met her actual bf), but for months I was not sure to take the next step(we were close friends and where going out, going to her house and all)... the thing is she met another guy and now they are boyfriends (when i knew they were a couple i was completly broken was horrible) and I don't have her anymore like before... In the last weeks my feelings have cleared to me, she is very special for me and I would like to tell her, but , not sure... also I know im something a bit bit special for her

I cant do anything, i dont want to love her but I cant stop it... sometimes I wanna kiss her I think she can understand if I do that spontaniously, she knows I do have feelings for her.. the problem she have a boyfriend that's also a close friend of me

PD: sorry for my bad english redaction
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s_kalb
replied October 13th, 2007
Experienced User
That's cheesy indeed. As far as I would say, stay a friend. Really. You love her, you both had great moments and all... but if the other guy is a friend right ? So I'd say let him enjoy too. It's not his fault if you didn't make a next step with her.

But okay if for example the guy were clearly an [anal opening] or disrespecting her, you could make her open her eyes on the situation (in a friendly way, i.e. don't take winning for granted, she's the decision taker).

But if they get along, I'm sorry but you had your time. The only thing you could do is be there for her when at bad times. Again, don't necessarily give your opinion on your advantage, that's just selfish. When at moments you're thinking like "why not me ??", just don't say it. Respect her, comment if necessary, and wait...

Good luck anyway.

SK.
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brokenradio
replied October 13th, 2007
thanks 4 replying , yeah both are my friends, dont want to screw the friendship
i will just wait and see what happends
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brokenradio
replied October 13th, 2007
This is also my situation: I can't stop thinking about her, and that makes me be with a bad mood , depressed and pensative(if this word exist lol)

I dont feel any more confidence of myself when talking to girls

What can I do to try to turn the page
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s_kalb
replied October 14th, 2007
Experienced User
When you can't turn a page... switch books.

Do something else, things that are "far away" from her, if necessary try something new, change habits, go dash your energy out of yourself and have fun. There's other things in life than relationships. I've been through enough to say that okay, love is indeed great, but living without love isn't necessarily miserable.
Disfocus yourself guys, you may even accidently meet someone at the gym, where you were at first there to think AWAY of relationships. Ironic isn't it ?
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