Medical Questions > Womens Health > Sexual Health - Women Forum

Saggy breasts and Large Labia (Page 1)

Must Read
Menstruation is a woman's normal monthly menstrual period. But what are the signs of abnormal periods? When is vaginal bleeding serious?...
Regular vaginal bleeding vagina is a sign of healthy menstruation. What signs and symptoms point to menstrual problems? Read on to learn the difference....
Menstrual irregularity means that something is wrong. Learn how to identify the signs and symptoms of an irregular period to prevent larger problems later...
Hi everyone.

I apologize for the length, but please read if you have time b/c I am in serious need of some answers/advice!!!!!

I am 21 years old and I also have always had a terrible insecurity about my vagina as well as my breasts. I am sexually active, but you're absolutely right, I find it very difficult to enjoy sex, especially when men want to keep the light on because I don't want them to see my body.

I have always had weight issues and I recently became unhealthy for a number of reasons and lost 40 lbs. I have always yo-yoed (10, 20, even 30 lbs) with my weight since I was 10 years old and always had a terrible body-image, but this is the most weight I have ever lost. The problem is I am so depressed I have a hard time looking at myself naked in the mirror and I feel I am still fat and disgusting, even though I weigh 110 lbs (10 lbs underweight for my height). I refuse to wear a short skirt, which has always been my dream, but I feel that my thighs are too big and my knees are deformed. Everyone tells me i'm crazy but I don't belive them.

I know this isn't normal, but I feel like my breasts are disgusting because they sag and have stretch marks, as do my hips, and my nipples are so big and get really wrinkled when i'm cold. I just feel that a woman's breasts are what make her a woman, but I feel like I have the body of a 40 year old woman instead of a 21 yr old. This is not by any means to imply that older women have ugly bodies (my mom is 43 and has an 18-yr old'd figure which is just grrreat for my self-esteem), only that I want to be able to enjoy a young, sag-free, stretch-mark free body like all my friends do. Instead it looks like I had 4 children.

This really gets me down, on an almost daily basis. More than anything I get depressed about my vagina. I have labia that hang down also about and inch, and I feel like it is so ugly. This makes me embarassed for guys to go down on me and sometimes interferes with easy penetration and some manuevering has to be done to get the labia out of the way. I feel that my vagina, as well as my breasts, take away my femininity and make me unattractive to the men I sleep with. I began blaming all my bad luck with men on these flaws.

I know I am very good at hiding my insecurities during sex- I don't show that I am embarassed or inhibited, I express enthusiasm and am willing to try numerous positions. But inside I am nervous that after one look at my vagina or breasts he is disgusted and just feels obligated to go through with it.

I've looked at some adult magazines and watched a few adult films and I never notice women with extended labia or sagging breasts. Obviously, there are other women with my same problem (although some of them may not find anything wrong with it and thats great, but obviously others feel the same as me), but such body parts are never portrayed as beautiful- instead women with no labia and firm breats are the "sexual ideal". This is what men grow up seeing and this is what they expect after all those magazines and films...So of course I am self-concious.

I also read that now many women (especially in hollywood) are getting labiaplasty (which is a removal of the labia for aesthetical purposes). I looked at some before and after pics online and some befores were almost insignificant compared to the length of my labia. Not to mention that I saw many of my close friends' vaginas, and none have extended labia, nor do any of them have breasts as saggy as mine. My 2 best friends even suggested I get implants to fill out the loose skin. So it all makes me feel like a freak!

Also, one time a male friend of mine, who happens to be very upfront about sex, was talking to me and a couple other girls about his turn-ons or offs and he said he is disgusted when "girls have that skin hanging from their vaginas"...He said that without even thinking that maybe one of us may have this flaw so it musty be very rare, but either way it hurt my feelings and made me even more insecure.


Every day I wish I could have a pretty vagina so that I can stop blaming the way my body turned out on all my failures with men. I have slept with 8 men and all but 2 were a one night stand. I did not want the majority of these 6 one-night stands to end the way they did. Most of them were guys I already knew/was friends with, and I feel like my inadequate body parts are to blame for them not persuing anything beyond that.

Every time I would get up the guts to ask a gynocologist about my labia and whether they're normal or not I was brushed off with "u should just love your body and be happy". Thats easy to say, but if someone has my intense insecurities which interfere with her ability to be comfortable in her own skin, she would not be telling me to forget it and be happy.

Anyways, i'm sorry for rambling, but I feel like this is the only way I can talk about this and I would love some feedback from other women who share this problem and empathize or even those who disagree. Also, has anyone talked to or heard from men on this topic? With no holding back, how do they feel about extended labia? Last- I need a woman's opinion: how many women (%) do you think have extended labia?
Did you find this post helpful?
First Helper shakti66
|

replied November 28th, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
How sad you feel so many issues with your body!You could have all these issues resolved cosmetically,but you need to feel good about yourself,first!!While it is true you could have your labia reshaped,you do stand to possibly lose sensation from the procedure(i would not want to take that chance!!).Perhaps you should focus more on why you feel so much anxiety over your body instead of trying to change it.We are often our own worst critics and others do not see what we obsess over.Poor self image can still exsist even if you have your flaws fixed.Maybe you could talk to a professional about your problems,you are truly not alone in this department.Good luck to you.Patty
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied July 4th, 2007
Help Is At Hand......
Posted: 07-04-07 10:48am

------------------------------------------ --------------------------------------

Hiya I have the same problem and have been too embarreced to even tell my partner of 10 yrs am 26 and just feel ugly un natural, so I wrote a letter to the docter as I just could not face him he wrote back with a request to c him so I went as I now did not have to explain my self to him he refered me to see a gyno at the hospital I went we talked and he could see how upset it was making me I asked if you could have labia reduction sergury on the nhs as I have looked in to having it done privetley and it costs £4000 I posibley could never afford that. He wrote aletter to the pta asking for funding and they agreed to fund me the opperation on the nhs so I go and have the opp in a few weeks. I just felt the same as you too embarreced to talk but if you write a letter expressing you emotions and how it makes you feel am sure they will refer you if thats what you want of course.
Hope this information as helped
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied July 4th, 2007
Especially eHealthy
i dont think its a thing to be embarassed about!
you dont know what a vagina looks like? so what

and as far as the "i cant explain why a guy would evre want to look at that mess"
lol that craced me up because its so true. but... why would women want to look at their drapeing piec of skin either?
when you overall think about those bdy parts its just weird!

but i would serach it online.
dont go to googe and type in vagina though...i mean...that wouldnt be what you were looking for
and you wouldnt wanna go to a library and walk up to the counter with16 book on vagina's either lol
best of luck and its really all less complicated then it looks!
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied May 4th, 2008
Im only 16 and everything you said is exactly how I feel about it...

I'm 3 1/2 months pregnant so I have to wait until I have the baby to get the surgery done to remove the labia though...but i am going to get it removed...

And I've had stretch marks on my breasts and hips [and thighs] since I was around 13 [and I weigh 120lbs] so you're not alone on that either...

I find it hard to do the whole "wipe from front to back" because of the labia, too.

And worst of all, my Fiance doesnt even know about it, he just keeps asking why I keep my hand down there while we're having sex [I cant necessarily explain to him that its to keep some sagging skin out of the way]

I know EXACTLY how you feel, but i recommend the removal surgery [just get your GYN to refer you to a plastic surgeon [and if ur GYN keeps telling you to be happy with your body, let him/her know that you're not happy and he/she should quit telling you to be happy, cause its not gonna work that easy]
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied May 4th, 2008
Firstly, men usually don't pursue a relationship after "casual sex"/one night stands because the immediate sex turns them off of having a real relationship! Trust me, I have been there! It has nothing to do with them not thinking you are sexy or beautiful or whatever... You simply shouldn't have sex so soon with men you truly like and desire to have a relationship with. They wouldn't have had sex with you if they didn't find you attractive.
Second, these insecurities with your body are terrible to have but guess what?? Your friends have them too! Their discouraging comments blatantly show their own self esteem issues!
Most girls feel insecure about their vagina's... Especially when we have to live up to the porn stars as you said! And also, I can assure you (if not all), most girls are insecure with their breasts!
The way I see it, surgery is an easy way out. An easy way out of something that is probably totally unnecessary. The most beautiful girls are usually the ones who feel ugliest. Instead of focusing on your TINY physical "flaws" that you feel you may have, focus on loving yourself.. as cliche as that sounds, this is what really makes you attractive. Men go crazy over confident chicks. The more you love and respect yourself, the more you will see men running to you from all directions and that's a promise!
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied July 13th, 2008
I absolutely agree with elle2389. And as far as your labia interfering with normal sex, a female needs to be properly aroused before sex, in which your female parts will naturally open like a flower, be moist and things should slide very easily, be comfortable, in which your labia shouldn't get in the way at all. Some men don't understand this, or is just too hot to slow down and take time. And I'm thinking "one-night stands" fall into this category more often than not, which most of the men you've been with were one-night stands. Don't hand out your flower to just anyone immediately. Make sure he's worthy of you, and wants to take time with your precious body. You need to be cherished. Smile
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied July 13th, 2008
Experienced User
A couple of years ago, i was trying to find porn with ladies having large labia. I am fascinated by the large lips! I think ones without any lips are too boring. So don't be insecure about your labia. Everyone has a different taste but as for me, i love large labia.
As far as stretch marks, yes, i do find those unsightly but a few creams out there can take care of that plus a little bit of massage will keep the blood circulation going and keep them beautiful !
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied December 11th, 2008
reply to the 21 year old girl
Hi,
I completely understand your problem, I have a similar one. I am 26 years old though and in the past 3 years I have yo-yoed with my weight, so, expectedly, my breasts are sagging. Not to mention that I am still overweight and that I am afraid that my breasts may sag even more after I lose more weight. Terrible, I feel locked in this unpleasant weight and body and even though I have a boyfriend, I am not certain about him not minding the way I look...several incidental comments of his made me think that he is pretty much about looks and that sooner or later I will be too ugly for him...
But after I read your email, I understood that I am not the only one with the problem and the problem itself seems less desperate than before. I really think that we may be underestimating ourselves by defining ourselves through the way we look. I mean, I see many beautiful girls every day, I envy them a lot and sometimes feel like I could trade 30 years of my life for a body like that... It's really painful to go on the street sometimes. I wished I lived in the woods where I would see no other women and had no chance to compare myself to them.
its the media we all know that, they have washed our brains pretty bad so that we look at ourselves as a peace of meat. Especially women, come on, when would a guy even bother about being ugly, short, fat, skinny, having a penis like this or like that...they just don't care and go on with their lives.

As regards your vagina, I dont' really know what you are talking about but I am sure that it is, even unpleasant, only a detail, something only a malicious guy would comment on. Look at it from this perspective: not only what is beautiful is sexy, sometimes different or strange things can be sexy too. Make sure you fall in love with someone before having sex, that will minimize the risk of feeling dissapointed because you will feel loved in returned---that's probably the reason why I don't think my boyfriend does not mind my looks, I am not in love with him, nor is he with me, its just habit...
I just wanted to share this with you so that you know that you are not alone, and that, considering that, things are not as bad as they seem now.
After all, we will probably have kids one day and won't even bother about it if our family is happy.
Smile
|

replied December 11th, 2008
Extremely eHealthy
I dont think a man is not going to be with you for these reasons..like someone else said, one night stands are different..that probably wont turn into a relationship anyway...as for a guy you've been dating for a while and care for, i really dont think this is going to make or break the relationship..everyone has insecurities..even guys worry about their performance and size all the time...if the guy ditches you for this then he is shallow and doesn't deserve you anyway..be confident..no one is perfect, this is just what makes you you
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied January 22nd, 2009
i thought about my labia when i was a teenager, and thought it was too big, not like a little girl, but when i was 18 i went to a gyn and he said without me even asking, that i have a beautiful thingy, and i didn't bother about it anymore . it does get a bit in the way during sex, but i never felt embarrased . i only done it with one guy . we have a 3 month old daughter . after my mediolateral episiotomy it was left a bit asymmetrycal at the bottom because of the incision and because a stitch came out too early . i was bothered by that a lot hen i noticed, but now i am more worried about somthing more obvious, my breasts, because i am breast feeding, and my breasts did not grow during pregnancy and when the milk came in they doubled in size, and now i am afraid that after the milk goes away they will not be to my liking . i had very small breasts, like an A cup, i don't know, because i i didn't ware bras, and 'm from Romania so we have other measuring system. and because they grew so much in one few days, i got strech marks on them so mainly that's what i worry about, because the skin that has strechmarks on it looses it's elasticity, and when the fullness of the mik goes away, the skin left behind may not be as ferm , or quite not firm at all because of the strechmarks. my man says he will like me even so, but that he does not think it will be as bad as i fear . i got used very hard to having small breasts, i really don't want to have to get used to havinh small saggy breasts, i'm only 23 years, and my current gyn only had to say that we are all on a down slanting curve, and i have to agree, but i consider it should start after 35 years . at worst .
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied March 18th, 2009
I'm only 14 years old and for the past half year or more I've had a large left Labia. It's baggy and gets in the way. I really don't know what to do about it, and my doctor has never seen it before. Do any of you know what it is? Or if it's harmful, or just part of my body? Please respond, I really am worried.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied April 8th, 2009
i feel the exact same
i feel the exact same way! i am 16 and i hate my vagina so much. i have looked up vagina surgery (i forget the name of the procedure) online and so many of the before pictures dont compare to mine. I have a boyfriend that i love and that loves me and we are about to have sex. i never let him finger me and he has only ever done it when im drunk. i dont know what to do because although i know he wont be mean about my large labia i dont want to be embaressed infront of him. i wish pretty much every time i look at my vagina that i had a smaller one like all of my friends do. im too embaressed to talk to my mom about it or go to the doctor. i would never want my mom to know that i had a big vagina and wanted surgery. i would do anythingggg for surgery.

so- i completely understand and i wish i could help you. its such an uncomfortable feeling and im a teenager and already have enough insecurities to worry about.

anyone know what to do about this one?
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied April 10th, 2009
Another outlook
I am 27 years old and I just heard the term "extended labia" the other day on the radio. I was looking it up as I wondered if it was something that I have, and I came across this forum. I just have to say that I do have an extended labia, and I have never felt any embarrassment or shame from it. I have had several sexual partners that were all more than one night stands and never once have any of them indicated that I was anything less than beautiful. If fact, I have had some even say that my vagina was sexy.

I have seen images of women with, so called "normal" looking vaginas and I have wondered what was wrong with them. To me this looks like a little girl. I love my body and could not imagine wanting to have plastic surgery on my vagina.

I am only sharing this because I think it is important to hear another side of the story. One where someone has a positive opinion about their extended labia.

Also, someone above mentioned that it was unlikely that the men you are involved with feel the way you do about your vagina. It may not be a bad idea to talk to your sexual partners and ask them what they think of it. You may be pleasantly surprised at their reactions. Also, don't forget, everyone has different preferences and turn-ons, just like we all do with everything. If you do get a response from a guy (such as the friend who mentioned that he did not like it), it does not mean that many men out there don't love it (as in the person who wrote the post about specifically looking for porn featuring women with large labias).

I hope you all can learn to love your body and feel like the sexy women that you are, with out feeling like you have to resort to plastic surgery.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied April 14th, 2009
You are Lucky
Hey, I'm a 45 yr old male, and I found this on google as I searched for Large Labia. I find a girl/woman with a large labia very very sexy. I imagine that your girl 'wettness' and scent is better because it remains in the folds of your lips, and not in your panties. Also it is such a sexy thing when a girl must hold her lips open before penetration. Enjoy your better vagina..the closed slit type are so boring to look at, less interesting to lick, and not anywhere near the pleasure to explore with gentle fingers!!! Celebrate that you have a more desirable vagina than your friends..and I wish I was yoru lover
|
Did you find this post helpful?
Users who thank Fagan for this post: ahtnamasgem 

replied April 14th, 2009
Experienced User
Re: You are Lucky
Fagan wrote:
Hey, I'm a 45 yr old male, and I found this on google as I searched for Large Labia. I find a girl/woman with a large labia very very sexy. I imagine that your girl 'wettness' and scent is better because it remains in the folds of your lips, and not in your panties. Also it is such a sexy thing when a girl must hold her lips open before penetration. Enjoy your better vagina..the closed slit type are so boring to look at, less interesting to lick, and not anywhere near the pleasure to explore with gentle fingers!!! Celebrate that you have a more desirable vagina than your friends..and I wish I was yoru lover

If you're seeing someone right now that's smaller I strongly urge her to dump you right way because any woman can do better then you. I could never judge someone based one what a particular body part looks like(especially parts that people have no control over what it looks like) because I find that very insulting yet men feel the need to do that to women all of the time. Not only that but if you judge someone based solely on what their body looks like then that says a lot about you. What would you do if you met a woman who sweeps you off of your feet only to find out she's smaller down there? Would you leave her and end what could be the best relationship of your life?

Now to the ladies. I think it's great that you're realizing that you're not alone with the way you look down there but also keep this in mind. If a person is comfortable with how they look, they would be able to accept others for looking either similar or different from themselves. Anyone who says that they like the way their body or a certain part looks then feels the need to put down others who are different from themselves are still very insecure about themselves.

Good day!
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied August 17th, 2011
Um red rose.....as a fellow woman with large labia, please do not berate this gem of a man (fagan) who openly loves larger labia.....You obviously do not have these and have no idea what those of us who do, go through....ALL of the images we see in porn etc are of women without any protruding flesh down there and you have no idea what its like to grow up feeling you are somehow very ugly an not normal down there and you also have no idea what that does to a womans senses of normal sexual confidence. Now when a man professes he loves large labia over small you try and take him down?? Like you cant take one little slight over your already glorified tiny lipped perfect vagina???
|
Did you find this post helpful?
Users who thank shakti66 for this post: ahtnamasgem 

This post is being reviewed to be sure that it adheres to our Community Guidelines.
Thanks for your patience!

replied April 15th, 2009
Labia Size not Relationship Issues
Get off your soap box and stop narrating about 'personanlity over looks' ...my comment was not on what makes an ideal woman....if you take time to read the thread you will discover women are expressing an embarrassment over the appearence of their large labia...I am saying girls celebrate this it nothing to be embarrassed about...if you want to discuss what makes a relationship then let us go to another forum...by your tone I suspect you are ugly, single and have no labia!!! Sad Sad person.

Comment on the subject not your opinion of me !!!
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied April 15th, 2009
Woooh there don't take any drastic action!!
Hey hun, I'm 23 and lost a lot of weight in quite a small space of time. Its left me with very saggy boobs, when I lay on my side they kind of dissapere into the bed looking like a puddle. I've always had issues with my body but nothing like I had with my boobs, i especially as they used to be the envy of all the girls where I worked. I felt like I's lost a part of me and was left with two snooker balls in socks. But....low and behold, over time I've grown to love...well at least like them, a good bra can do wonders!! At the end of the day they are a part of us so we'd better just get used to it. Not everyone's gifted with the magazine girl looks or shap (or airbrushing and plumping up etc) Luckely I have a pretty supportive bloke who swears he still loves them just as much. If I wasn't with him though I'd find a way of making myself feel better about myself from within LONG before even considering surgery, do more things you enjoy, get out and about, get a new hobby or past-time, anything that'll boost your confidence.

I also have pretty big outer lips down below but was never really bothered by it until recently when I saw a girl on the tele preparing for surgery to have her's trimmed (owwww!!) and they looked perfectly normal to me!! Infact I think mine where bigger! Just goes to show how we all view ourselves differently (mostly worse than anyone else in the whole world) and we all are so different. there is no right or wrong way to look, beauty really does come from within.

I hope your find some inner peace hunny and whatever you do don't give up. your amazing just like the rest of us :0D xxxx
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied April 15th, 2009
Experienced User
Re: Labia Size not Relationship Issues
Fagan wrote:
Get off your soap box and stop narrating about 'personanlity over looks' ...my comment was not on what makes an ideal woman....if you take time to read the thread you will discover women are expressing an embarrassment over the appearence of their large labia...I am saying girls celebrate this it nothing to be embarrassed about...if you want to discuss what makes a relationship then let us go to another forum...by your tone I suspect you are ugly, single and have no labia!!! Sad Sad person.

Comment on the subject not your opinion of me !!!

LOL! Wanting a woman to feel better about them self is one thing but when you are putting down others in the process then that's another and that's exactly what you did. That is what sad people do which you did again in your post. While yes, physical looks are important, they do fade and bodies do change as you get older. What stays is the personality which is why it's so important. If someone is truly loves you then they would be able to accept you for no matter how you look. I would've expected someone of your age to know that.

As for my tone, that is the tone of a strong woman who's not afraid to voice her opinion. Am I ugly? Far from! If I can go to a concert and constantly be commented on how beautiful I am and even trying to be persuaded into moving to be closer to those men then I clearly don't have a problem in the looks department. I've even been told that I look a good 10+ years younger then my actual age. Single? Yes but that's by choice. Pursuing the things I want in life are far more important for me right now and as for no labia(noticed that you again had to put others down? SAD!), I do have it. Mine are not too big and not too small. It's just right! Btw, if you actually read all of my post, you would've noticed that I did make a comment on the subject.

half-pickled-turnip wrote:
there is no right or wrong way to look, beauty really does come from within.

I love your attitude! I just wish more people could think that way. I just hope that all women, both big and small, read this and take it to heart.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied April 30th, 2009
an outie
its okay and guys actually thinks its sexy and I believe more enjoyable than innies. as you get older, sweat accumulates there and in my experience is uncomfortable and now at 40 i would get a reduction...but i am a little spastic. i suppose.
|
Did you find this post helpful?