it is not fair that you are doing everything!
first you need to sit down with her and tell her flat out that she needs to start helping
maybe find a way for you guys to split the housework

but tell her how you feel. really sit down and explain how unfair it is for you to do everything all the time

good luck!

I have trie that and all i get is her telling me to stop treating her like i am her dad. And it just starts a big argument so i have backed off and just deal with it but it gets frustrating. And i hate the fact that she tells me i am treating her like her dad and i can't tell her what to do

sounds like you guys are haveing some problems then
maybe a marriage counselor would help
other than that i dont know what to tell you

i think i just need someone to vent to don't really have anyone to talk to about these kind of problems

you can vent to me anytime! im on here alot so let me know if you ever need anything!

8years is a long time ot be putting up woth something htat should have had a stop to it years ago. Marriage is built on love nad trust and is SUPPOSE TO BE A PARTNERSHIP. Your wife is taking advantage of you and you have allowed her to get away with it for so long, of course she's gonna use that old worn out excuse..."I'm too tired" or "Quit treating me like you are my father " My brothers wife has done the exact same thing for over14 years............they are in the process of divorce. Hell, if you are going to do all the work and raise the kids alone, what do you need her for???????? Just stating waht I see, not gonna sugar coat and say try to talk it out, becuase you have tried this and it did not work. Clean, cook and raise a family. hat the hell does she do? Its up to you, you can keep venting or be a man, step up to the plate and tell her its 50/50 or she can get to the curb.............you deserve better!

You know you are right but i guess i am just hoping there is a chance she will realize what she is doing

There will be no chance if you don't step up.

My cousin's wife was doing like that too until one day he packed his things and left the house. She got so scare she even agreed to go marriage retreat and my cousin says she is now a new woman. All the bad habits gone.

I am scared to do that (thought about it alot) don't want to put the kids through that kind of situation but i don't like being screwed over either

eight years!!! wow!!! thats quite sometime.
first off.
have you tried makin arrangements with her?
maybe certain days of the week you can pick up the children and she can do the dishes those days.
that way it kind of switches up the roles.
or honestly yall can do this exercise...
when my sister and brother-in-law were havin issues the therapist told them to make a list of things that they felt were creating problems in the house...
and everynight you talk about one problem...
and you come up with a solution together...
and truthfully it wouldnt hurt to compromise.
meet in the middle.
like make the saturdays or whatever day she has off the day yall clean the house together.
that way you wont have to clean nearly as much.
and when the kids bring out toys or books, when they are through playin ask them to pickup their toys that way the kids.
that should help too.

I have been married for 7 years. My wife is playing the same game. I have been debating for some years on divorce. The reason I have not left yet is because of the kids. I hurt inside alot. My wife just refuses and makes up accuse about helping around the house. Why are women acting this way.

if she doesn't do things around the house and takes it for granted that you do then dont do it...stop doing HER laundry do your own..clean your dishes etc..maybe it will prove a point...this topic was actually on the radio..about what the husband and wife does..one woman called in and said the first few months of moving in are crucial thats sort of when you figure out who does what in the relationship..this woman in particular NEVER took out the trast..so her husband had to..he never did the dishes so she had to..so through the years it was just assumed if the trash get full then its time for him to do the trash...how did you get roped into doing ALL the chores?! haha...that really is unexceptable though...and aggravating i'm sure...

to jayroy: it isn't women in general..its just you and his wife apparently..i find that it isn't fair for one person to be doing the cleaning ALL the time..if i make a mess, i clean it..and i expect the same of my boyfriend...we help each other out..thats the way its supposed to be..if your wives are slacking then it needs to be talked about..but dont expect THEM to do all the work either

Very important: Keep your manners, stay very loving and give her lots of compassion for this method to work correctly.

I had the same situation with my wife; I learned if you take a step back and be very patient this method works. I found myself always cleaning, cooking, etc. While she surfed the web, watched TV, etc.

I took a step back and stopped cleaning, cooking, etc. As the house started to look worse and worse to the point where you couldn't see the floor. She started to get frustrated and complained why don't I clean, I gave here the same answers she gave me such as: I will do it later, I don't have time right now, or my favorite Your not my mother (in her case father). It took about 60 days for her to realize I was really not going to clean, cook, etc. Slowly she began to pick up on things and improved day by day. Currently she cooks, cleans, etc. everything is at the 50/50 mark between us. Marriage is a partnership not a burden. Hope this helps