Sexual Health - Men Forum - Why Can't He Keep His Erection When We Are Having Sex?

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Q: Why Can't He Keep His Erection When We Are Having Sex?

asked by: SMTHELP on September 26th, 2007

New User

Hello All,
My boyfriend and I have been going out for almost 6 months now. I'm 25 and he's 23, were crazy about each other, and every aspect of our relationship is perfect...except... The first time we had sex, things went off with a bang, then about 10 minutes in he lost his erection, and said he's always had a hard time keeping an erection with the woman on top, moments later he re-gained his erection, and all and all it was a sucessful experience. That was about 6 weeks after we started dating...we have never had sex since. When things start to get heated he always is rock hard, than when it comes down to having sex...nothing...it's completely gone, and doesn't come back. We have tried several times with several different positions, the same thing happens with oral too, and every time the same thing happens. Is it me? What can I do to help? He says nothing like this has ever happened or been a problem before, and that he loves me and doesn't know what to do. Does anyone have any suggestions! PLEASE HELP, it's embearssing for him, and mortifying for me. Thanks for all your help. Embarassed

Replies(6)

marvel

replied on September 26th, 2007

Supporter

Its easy for a guy to get over-stimulated. This might be happening to him. Sometimes lots of friction just isn't pleasureful. You two should experiment to see what gets him off.

If this doesn't work, he might have to go and talk to a doctor about it, because it could be something wrong physically. However, given the fact that he has no problem getting an erection when things get heated, I would just say to first try different techniques to keep him hard.

joeitalian3

replied on September 28th, 2007

New User

Erection??

probably stress and/or anxiety to perform

longisland

replied on October 6th, 2007

New User

Its Just a Psychological Issue.

I had the same problem during my first few times of having sex. I agree with joe that it is the anxiety to perform thats the main problem. Try this. It works for me.

Get him to drink until he's tipsy but not drunk. probably 2-3 glasses of spirits but not wine. Wine makes you sleepy. Then switch on his favourite tune just to distract his mind. Then enjoy !!

I hope this suggestion comes to use.

Georgia59

replied on October 6th, 2007

Especially eHealthy

Drinking may work for some people, but it definitely doesn't work for most. For most people, drinking has the effect of making erections go away and making stimulation less intense. I wouldn't suggest drinking to anyone who has issues with sex.

sillysallie1990

replied on October 8th, 2007

Experienced User

i would suggest trying again and when he starts to lose his erection, dont make a big deal outta it!!!! tkae his atten elswhere start talking with him or watch tv... lol maybe dont put clothes back on... lol try to turn him on without him knowing then let him instigate the sex because is sounds like you guys are gitting pretty desperate and are putting to much emphisis on him keepin it up... thats alot of pressure and no body ever wants sex to come to that... if this doesnt help you guys need to see a professional... hey i heard that sex therapy can be lots of fun lol.

silentbear777

replied on October 9th, 2007

New User

Same thing happened to me the first few times I had sex, its nerves, I was getting really nervous about it... I cant really say what exactly, just nervous... relax... and reember oral... once hes inside you, he will stay hard, and if he goes soft before you can get that far, give a little oral for a quick revival. After a while he will get over being nervous and be able to perform!

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