Can Panic Attacks Be So Bad That You Want to Commit Suicide? Posted: 09-23-07 23:58pm
I had a very nasty panic attack earlier
today, one far worse than quite possibly
anything I've experienced before, perhaps
matching the 1st one I ever had, and it
made it so bad I was looking around for a
razor and seriously considered committing
suicide.
What happened was I was convinced that
suddenly I was going to die and everything
around me started looking sinister and
evil and I started seeing 666 everywhere
and just evil things popping out of
everywhere , which freaked me the hell
out, then started the rapid heartbeat and
the breathing, and I was 1000% convinced
that my death was imminent, and that the
devil was going to take me straight to
hell and that this current anxiety panic
fear state i was feeling was going to last
for all eternity, and at that moment I was
like holy caca, I'm still alive, god help
me before I die I dont want to end up like
this, yet I was also reaching for the
razors. Realizing that this was bad, I
rushed into my car and sped off to the
ER.
I know it's bad to drive in a state like
this, but I was so desperate at that
point. Knowing also that most likely it
was a horrid panic attack, either that or
a doing it possession by Satan himself,
that's how bad it felt, I took some ativan
to help with the symptoms. Upon arriving
at the ER, and seeing a counselor and much
Ativan later, I calmed down to normal, and
realized that infact it was an extremely
awful anxiety attack, that came out of the
blue.
All I know is, how the HELL can these
things be THIS powerful?
It's awful!!!
I'm glad I beat it this time, but they can
come right out of the blue, and send you
straight to HELL, a mental hell that's so
anguishing, I don't think anything matches
it.
Is this a true bad panic attack, or is
there more going on than I know, perhaps
other mental disorders thrown in there?
It was scary. Scary thoughts , straight
from hell. lol.
It's almost as if, your worst fears and
anxieties, and what not, or your own brain
turns against you at full force, spewing
the most fearful thoughts, and nasty body
symtpoms you can imagine all at once for
an intense 5-10 period, testing your will
to live.
Why are these things so nasty?
Does life stress, or something I did,
contribute to these things?
Or is it a chemical imbalance thing?
Whatever this is, it's extremely
frightening.
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CarolDiane
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Joined: 23 Sep 2007 Posts: 2396
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Whoa! Hold On to Yourself Posted: 09-24-07 01:27am
Time to set down and have a chat with ya.
You are so young and have a lifetime ahead
of you. Nothing and I mean nothing in this
world can be that bad for you to want to
do something as drastic as that. People
love you and I am sure your family loves
you. You deffenatly need emmediate
intervention and help. You and I mean YOU
are a precious person and deserve to have
a wonderful life. You need to grab hold of
this and seek help for what it is that has
triggered this event.
What medication are you on? Are you seeing
a doctor on a regular basis?
First of all let me say this much, it is a
good sign that you took that razor blade
and instead of using it, came to this
forum for help. Let me bring out again a
little of my personal life here. I have
attempted suicide as a teen three times!
Yes three times. All three times I
overdosed on over the counter meds. And
all three times I call 911 for help. You
are crying out here and I am hearing you.
You need to find help to find the source
that is causing this thought. There has to
be something in your life that has
happened to make you think this way. Mine
was a bad love affair with my high school
sweetheart. Actually all but one was over
a lost love. Third was a bad marrage.You
life is priceless and you have so much to
live for and goals to achieve. Don't let
life pass you by. You are too good for
that. Please get some help. Talk to your
parents or school counsler or anyone.
I am not a couslor nor am I a doctor. I am
a support person who cares. And just
happens to be one that has been where you
are right now. Yes, I have worked in the
mental health area, but still not
qualified to counsel, just guide you in
the right direction. Life can throw some
fast balls at us. We just have to learn to
catch them my friend.
I am soooo glad you went for help, you did
the right thing and you my friend are on
the right track now. I went into a panic
attack for you and did not read the last
part of you post. LOL on my part. Panic
can be a nightmre I know. Did they say
anything about changing your med's? I'm
taking it that you did not tell them you
were having suicidal thoughts or about the
razor blade eh? I don't think you would be
home writting this topic if you did.
Shame, shame.....you are avoiding the
problem here. Get to the root and get a
grip on it now. You will be happier for
it. Trust me.
I hope there was on word in this whole
post that might have helped you.
((((Teddy Bear Hugs))))
MsSky
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CarolDiane
Supporter
Joined: 23 Sep 2007 Posts: 2396
Thanks: 111
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So Happy You Are Feeling a Bit Better Today Posted: 09-24-07 12:14pm
Puffy2,
You are so right about the times we live
in. Everyday we have more and more to
contend with. I know sometimes it feel so
overpowering to us. Yes, it can be
horrific. I too have been there. The only
advice I can give right now is, could be
you need a change in medication if you are
on any. And if you are not, talk to your
doctor about what happened and see what
path doc wants to talk. That is what I
meant when I said life will throw us some
fast balls. Sometimes to fast. I you tried
Yoga? Relaxation theropy is very good.
Clear your mind and go to somewhere nice
like a beach or moutains. You would be
surprise. There are a lot of mood
elevating music for this. I have a dozen
CD's with soft atmosphereic or soundscapes
music. Use ear phones so you won't be
bothered with outside infulance.
Try it, you may like it and may work for
you. Try to understand the pre-attack
symptoms. You may be able to lessen them
if you know what to look for.
MsSky
Deleted post above me. And no, I am not
talking to myself.
