My First Step For Help (plz Ne1) Posted: 09-14-07 15:19pm
Hi this is kind of my first proper
admissin a few friends know but none know
how bad its gotten over time. im 19 and
have been cutting/burning since i was 12
when i found out the real reason for my
pearnts divorce witch knocked me for six.
i can't really rember how it hapend i
think i did somthing by accedent and foun
that i consentrated on the pain on the
outside rather than the inside. and from
then on whenever i felt hurt, trodden on
or alone i turned to my knife at first
when i was younger it wasnt that bad
little cutts but now ive gotten older and
and the world is crawler and so twisted
and full of people who dont care its got
to bad. someone once told me to try
setting the number of cut before u do it i
tryed that but i would just do it deeper
or longer and end up doing as much as i
normaly would. im now in a bad way my body
is a wreck my chest arms and legs i konw
drepression comes and goes but part of it
is always in the back of my mind some days
im really good but then i hear a song or
something thats reminds me of what ive
been through and i break. this is a plea
for help anyone who can give some kind
words or just a reply just so i know that
im not a lost cause ps ive been sat with
my mouse over the submit button for 2
houres now this is hard for me
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Fairy Godmother
Supporter
Joined: 11 Oct 2003 Posts: 1486 Location: , Georgia USA
Thanks: 80
Thanked:110
online
Hey Sweetie Posted: 09-14-07 15:42pm
No, you are never a lost cause...........I
am here and I care. Yes hte hell I
care...It makes me sick what depresion can
do. You need some professional help and
until you get this, this will continue
until you do damage that can not be
reversed. There are people in this world
who care. As for wanting to hurt yourself,
this was somehting I could not understand,
becasue I always wanted to hurt the SOB's
that hurt me....My parenst divorced when I
was 6, my Mother raised me and my two
brothers alone..............lots of
hardships. Then was uprooted to move in
wiht my father and his BRIDEZILLA from
hell.........bad childhood. I want you to
look in a mirror nad tell yourself how
special you are..........stop feeling
sorry for you and take control oof YOUR
LIFE. Do not allow yourself to harm
yourself anymore. Its more of a control
thing.........find a doctor or therapist
you can talk to.....I am always here if
you want to PM me!
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Keeba88
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 08 Sep 2007 Posts: 223 Location: ,
Posted: 09-14-07 15:53pm
I kinda know what you are talking abot.
But i can't say that i've ben in your
shoes. I wont go into details or anything
but i was in a relationship that legal i
wasn't suppose to be in and some 'others'
found out and he was sent away. I was
devistated! But needless to say i wanted
to do something like you have already done
but i didn't have to guts to so i actually
took a needle and carved a heart on the
inside of my leg right above my ankle. I'm
now happily in a relationship with someone
that is way better for me and everytime i
see the scare it brings me back. So, as
i'm sure you already know, the sooner you
stop the better its going to be. You'r
going to have less scares to remind you of
your past once you get through this. If
you don't mind me asking:
Do you have a girlfriend?
A best friend/anyone to run to?
This isn't going to turn into suicide
right? It more like a 'im angry, lets let
some pain out' kinda thing?
And i know what its like to go through a
divorce with parents. My parents just went
through one this past year and i'm 19 now.
So if you would like to Private Messag me
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DO!! I know divorce's
can be so hard to go through. And just to
make it worse i have to meet my mom's new
'boyfriend' tonight at 6pm and its 4pm now
It's going to be
very weird!
But please hang in there and let me know
if there is anything that i can do to help
you out!
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twilight_mist
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Jul 2007 Posts: 40 Location: ,
Thanks: 1
Thanked:0
Posted: 09-20-07 16:48pm
We care about you very much.
- Have you tried methods of "hurting"
yourself without causing harm? (Like ice
cubes)?
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keys101
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Sep 2007 Posts: 87 Location: , USA
Posted: 09-22-07 01:52am
honey, the world may seem like it's full
of wackos who just want to hurt you, but
it's twice as full of people who care, who
want to help others. People aren't half
bad- hell, they're not a quarter bad. I
think maybe you know that at least a
little bit- otherwise you wouldn't have
asked complete strangers for help.
Firstly, you are not alone. i know exactly
what you're going through, having started
at the same age and having felt the same
way you described. I started when i was 12
and i haven't done it again since i was
15. (i'm 17 now.)
Secondly, if i can stop anyone can.
you're not broken, nobody needs to fix
you. you just need to realize your
infinite potential and enormous worth.
you're a beautiful individual and you DO
NOT deserve to be hurt, by anyone in the
world INCLUDING and especially yourself.
please message me any time i feel like it-
you can't freak me out and i won't think
less of you no matter what. so vent, chat,
rant, ask, whatever. just know that there
are people in the world who want to help
and honey I'm one of 'em!
It's going to be
very weird!
