Wow! Not good. Your relationship is definitely unhealthy. Personally, I've never been jealous or insecure. That's only because I wouldn't be in a relationship if I couldn't trust the other person. I'm not saying that your distrust is unwarrented, but you're torturing yourself by obsessing over it. If you have a change of heart and try to stick it out, you have to work on that. When you start obsessing, try focusing your energy elsewhere. It sounds like you start picturing scenarios and your mind runs with them until it consumes you. The next time you start to worry (unless it's truly warranted) I'd dismiss it and try to turn your attention to something else. Also, get some couples therapy. Maybe you can clear the air and learn how to communicate without letting tensions rise to the point of getting out of hand.
On the other hand, throwing in the towel may be best. Although I take the pledge of marriage seriously, I think violence is the beginning of the end in a relationship. It sounds like staying together isn't doing either of you any good and things are only going to continue to escalate. I wouldn't worry about what your family thinks. They're your family. They'll always love you and will have to get over it sooner or later. Ultimately they want what's best for you. If staying in a marraige that's rapidly spiraling out of control could lead to someone going to jail or getting hurt, they wouldn't want that. Just do what's best for you.
