Bipolar Disorder Forum - Bipolar Disorder: I Feel Like I Don't Belong Anywhere.

Mental Health > Bipolar Disorder Forum > Bipolar Disorder: I Feel Like I Don't Belong Anywhere.

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Q: Bipolar Disorder: I Feel Like I Don't Belong Anywhere.

asked by: James_Hawking on September 10th, 2007

New User

I have a sad tale to tell. It all started febuary of this year when I was institutionalized for a second time. Before I knew it my so-called friends started bailing out on me. One of them claimed I was stalking her. How in the heck do yo stalk someone you only see forty-five minutes a day at school in front of dozens of people in plain sight? Another ex-friend just stopped talking to me alltogether, and my girlfriend broke up with me, but I was totally overjoyed that we stayed friends. Then one day in May I called one of my so-called friends because I was depressed because my fool psychiatrist switched my meds up. So I call her and leve a message saying hey, I'm a bit bummed out and just need somebody to talk to, but it's nothing urgent. A week latyer she calls the police saying I'm suicidal. So I end up institutionalized a third time. Then when I get out my ex girlfriend tells me to never call her again, one of my friends cuts me out, and the crazy friend who said I was suicidal told her father I was stalking her even though I haven't even been in the same city for over three months and I only called her for the first time in that three months just this past saturday. I only have one friend in the world and live in a group home. Why should I even continue getting up in the morning. I need hope and guidance. Help me. Sad

Replies(3)

Jake3463

replied on September 11th, 2007

New User

Hang In There

I was just diagnosed last September and I've had a good deal of friends bail on me. Its just one of those things people don't understand Mental Illness. If you had a physical illness its easier to understand. It sucks but its the ignorance we face. Some people will think we are freaks for having this when it isn't our fault...the worst are the religious types...I've had a few number of my religous friends pray that this would go away and get frustated when it doesn't or blame this on me for not being close enough to God...if I had MS or Cancer would they talk that way? Try looking up a support group. It may be helpful to talk to others who have the same problems or just post to here for support. Try to remember some people will understand and others will not. You can't force people to understand if they don't want to. I'm lucky that I have an ex-girlfriend from high school with the same problem who was diagnosed earlier who is helping me navigate through this. Hopefully you can find someone who has already been there to help you navigate.

GodRulezMyLife

replied on October 3rd, 2009

New User

Doesn't anyone understand how you feel during a bipolar attack?

I can't stand my church ppl esp. When I'm depressed I tend to self mutilate n not think b4 I speak. They think that all I'm trying to do is seek attention, gain their sympathy and play with their feelings. They have stopped being there for me which is sucky and always tell me: you aren't close enough to God.. tt's y / you don't have any faith. Where's ur trust in God? It rly gets worse during a depressive episode when they have NO idea how it feels like n just tell me: you can control ur moods. Rely on God more. Stop being so sensitive. Nth is wrong w u, u r perfectly fine. You choose what emotions you wanna magnify, e.g. Why don't ppl ever understand? I'm now treated like a maniac in school. It's getting scary. One minute I feel rly rly happy n the nxt super depressed. These feelings just come n go for no reason. I'm tired n sick of it. What can be done to help?

katie33kate

replied on October 3rd, 2009

New User

I understand that with the right meds, you can live a normal life....except you need to be on medication all the time. An insulin dependent diabetic is the same.. must rely on medication all the time. ALL THE TIME.

The problems come when meds need to be changed and the need to modify them and 'fix' the mixture just right. OR..when the bi-polar refuses to get that help.

I was involved with a bi-polar man for a while. He refused meds.

Ask yourself this... if you were being abused every day..would you just keep turning the other cheek? At some point everyone is responsible for their actions...even bi-polar. You need to understand that no one has to put up with your off the wall actions...

You need to work on getting the right meds and the right levels.

I understand that the road to a normal life is a very tough one. People will stand by you and help...provided you are working harder than anyone else to reach that normal level.

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