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Help Sex With a Virgin Proving Difficult, Please Help!

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jako18

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Help Sex With a Virgin Proving Difficult, Please Help!
Posted: 08-17-07 10:30am

Hi im new to the forum but have been reading it for a while. Im 18 yrs old and been with my gf for 6months. We have decided its time to have sex. Last week we thought we had, it felt like it was in to me and she thought so too. BUT i decided i check by putting my hand down there and turned out the head had not entered her and it was part of my shaft that was kind of entering her. Anyway so the other night we tried again...no success at all, couldnt get it in. When id get close it would slip. My penis is around 7 inches long and when fully erect the head kind of points slightly downwards. So this is it making it hard for it to go in the right direction. Is it the height difference, shes 5'2 and im 6'2? Coz missionary just wont work. Please help.
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Georgia59

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Posted: 08-17-07 12:10pm

Try using your hands, making sure she is very well lubricated (using store bought lube if necessary) , and guiding your penis in. Maybe start by fingering her or oral so you are familiar with the area and both of you are very ready, and then when the time is right, use your hand and place your penis head in there, and then slowly start to push your body further in.

There's nothing wrong with using your hands to help you out. I've been having sex for years now and I still need hands every once in a while, sometimes the aim just isn't great lol. And try other positions... her on top is a good one for beginners because you can see what's happening better and she can have enough control to make sure nothing hurts, etc and get maximum pleasure.
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jako18

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Posted: 08-17-07 16:32pm

Well thats just it, i was using my hands and dear god it did not want to go in. It was like hitting a brickwall, as soon as it hit, it bent and wasnt goin in. I a familiar with her body, i have given her oral many times (ive actually never recieved oral from her), i have fingered her and we couldnt figure out why it wasnt working.
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young Girl

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Posted: 08-17-07 16:48pm

i would try some lube to make things easier Smile
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Tylanas

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Posted: 08-17-07 17:04pm

jako18 wrote:
Well thats just it, i was using my hands and dear god it did not want to go in. It was like hitting a brickwall, as soon as it hit, it bent and wasnt goin in. I a familiar with her body, i have given her oral many times (ive actually never recieved oral from her), i have fingered her and we couldnt figure out why it wasnt working.


Like I said, I think you need to stick your fingers in her first, with your penis right there. You'll know exactly where her entrance is and you can stretch it before putting your penis in there.
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Georgia59

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Posted: 08-17-07 17:24pm

if it's not going in at all, she could be dry or tight because she's nervous or not ready.

Make sure you spend lots of time getting her ready, in fact, try to get her to orgasm before you even attempt sex. Then she will be plenty lubricated and relaxed and it should go in easier.
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jako18

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Posted: 08-18-07 10:33am

Thanks for the suggestions, tried what you guys told me but sadly didnt work. Was still unable to enter her, shes getting a bit frustrated so i wish i could fix this problem.
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popminer

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Posted: 08-18-07 16:55pm

i found it easier to go slow and stuff and use lube, but try one big push and see what happens. sometimes you just have to use a little force, because it most likely will hurt.

girl on top might possibly be easier, but also more painful.
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Tylanas

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Posted: 08-18-07 17:40pm

popminer wrote:
i found it easier to go slow and stuff and use lube, but try one big push and see what happens. sometimes you just have to use a little force, because it most likely will hurt.

girl on top might possibly be easier, but also more painful.


I'm going to have to dismiss this right away.

First-time sex does not have to hurt. If it hurt, you did something wrong - aka you forced it in.
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jako18

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Posted: 08-18-07 21:02pm

Eiri wrote:
popminer wrote:
i found it easier to go slow and stuff and use lube, but try one big push and see what happens. sometimes you just have to use a little force, because it most likely will hurt.

girl on top might possibly be easier, but also more painful.


I'm going to have to dismiss this right away.

First-time sex does not have to hurt. If it hurt, you did something wrong - aka you forced it in.

It might not have to hurt but last time i tried, we were pretty lubed up and there was no chance i was entering. I was trying to go slow and not force anything in but it wouldnt work. Sex isnt meant to be this hard damn it lol.
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young Girl

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Posted: 08-18-07 22:21pm

jako18 wrote:
Eiri wrote:
popminer wrote:
i found it easier to go slow and stuff and use lube, but try one big push and see what happens. sometimes you just have to use a little force, because it most likely will hurt.

girl on top might possibly be easier, but also more painful.


I'm going to have to dismiss this right away.

First-time sex does not have to hurt. If it hurt, you did something wrong - aka you forced it in.

It might not have to hurt but last time i tried, we were pretty lubed up and there was no chance i was entering. I was trying to go slow and not force anything in but it wouldnt work. Sex isnt meant to be this hard blessings on it lol.


its ok you will get it Smile
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popminer

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Posted: 08-18-07 23:53pm

uhm okay my bad.
sorry i was just saying what worked for me.
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jako18

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Posted: 08-19-07 08:49am

U know it just sucks. We think we had it in once last week, just one of those in the moment things. But now we cant even get it in. It sucks coz for 6 months we have waited, which didnt bother me coz i love her but you know once youve had something like that once, you want it again and now its not happening. Shes more frustrated than me. When i say virgin she was a virgin in every way before she started goin out with me. So she had never been fingered. So when i do it, it still hurts her.
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Georgia59

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Posted: 08-20-07 11:45am

Maybe she needs to go to a doc. Nothing should hurt her- fingering, sex, or anything even if she is a virgin. Her sexual status has nothing to do with the mechanics of it all, and it should not hurt her.

I will say this again- if something hurts her, it is wrong!!! STOP!!! If you can't even get your fingers in there without pain, don't even think about a penis. That's just mean. When did people stop caring about the feelings of their vaginas?? I love mine and would never let anyone hurt it Sad

Are you absolutely sure she is well lubricated? Are you using lubricant? Does she orgasm before you even try to enter her? Try starting with oral and getting her good and ready (see if you can get her to orgasm with oral before entering) and DON'T put anything in there until she is ready and it won't hurt her.

If that isn't working, she needs to see a doctor. Something is wrong.
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jako18

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Posted: 08-21-07 08:17am

Georgia59 wrote:
Maybe she needs to go to a doc. Nothing should hurt her- fingering, sex, or anything even if she is a virgin. Her sexual status has nothing to do with the mechanics of it all, and it should not hurt her.

I will say this again- if something hurts her, it is wrong!!! STOP!!! If you can't even get your fingers in there without pain, don't even think about a penis. That's just mean. When did people stop caring about the feelings of their vaginas?? I love mine and would never let anyone hurt it Sad

Are you absolutely sure she is well lubricated? Are you using lubricant? Does she orgasm before you even try to enter her? Try starting with oral and getting her good and ready (see if you can get her to orgasm with oral before entering) and DON'T put anything in there until she is ready and it won't hurt her.

If that isn't working, she needs to see a doctor. Something is wrong.

Well from what ive been told by friends and that...it hurt them the first time they fingered their gf and it hurt during sex. Yes when we have tried sex but when fingered than no. Well im not great at oral and she doesnt really like it coz she gets kinda self conscious and well feels guilty coz she doesnt want to give it back. I dont mind though, i like doing it to her so when she wants it i give it to her. I dont get her to orgasm by using oral, mainly during dry stuff really. Like dry sex, works a charm and works nearly every time. The other day i made her orgasm like that and then thought id see if we could do it after coz shed be more relaxed. It seemed like it would be easier and like i could of got my penis in by she was too tired so we didnt.
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Georgia59

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Posted: 08-21-07 10:58am

jako18 wrote:
Georgia59 wrote:
Maybe she needs to go to a doc. Nothing should hurt her- fingering, sex, or anything even if she is a virgin. Her sexual status has nothing to do with the mechanics of it all, and it should not hurt her.

I will say this again- if something hurts her, it is wrong!!! STOP!!! If you can't even get your fingers in there without pain, don't even think about a penis. That's just mean. When did people stop caring about the feelings of their vaginas?? I love mine and would never let anyone hurt it Sad

Are you absolutely sure she is well lubricated? Are you using lubricant? Does she orgasm before you even try to enter her? Try starting with oral and getting her good and ready (see if you can get her to orgasm with oral before entering) and DON'T put anything in there until she is ready and it won't hurt her.

If that isn't working, she needs to see a doctor. Something is wrong.

Well from what ive been told by friends and that...it hurt them the first time they fingered their gf and it hurt during sex. Yes when we have tried sex but when fingered than no. Well im not great at oral and she doesnt really like it coz she gets kinda self conscious and well feels guilty coz she doesnt want to give it back. I dont mind though, i like doing it to her so when she wants it i give it to her. I dont get her to orgasm by using oral, mainly during dry stuff really. Like dry sex, works a charm and works nearly every time. The other day i made her orgasm like that and then thought id see if we could do it after coz shed be more relaxed. It seemed like it would be easier and like i could of got my penis in by she was too tired so we didnt.



You're friends are wrong. It should never hurt. I would buy lubricant and use that ALL THE TIME until it never hurts again. And if it still hurts, she NEEDS to see a doctor.

We need to unite and stop hurting vaginas!!!!!!

**This is important because pain during sex can be indicative of other conditions.
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Tylanas

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Posted: 08-21-07 11:53am

Hey it sounds like you made a breakthrough! Maybe you didn't get in that time, but next time do the same thing, and then try fingering Smile

Has she ever fingered herself? Does she use tampons? If she does either of those things and does them painlessly, then it's obviously a case of not enough lube, and her not guiding you right.
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jako18

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Posted: 08-22-07 19:46pm

Eiri wrote:
Hey it sounds like you made a breakthrough! Maybe you didn't get in that time, but next time do the same thing, and then try fingering Smile

Has she ever fingered herself? Does she use tampons? If she does either of those things and does them painlessly, then it's obviously a case of not enough lube, and her not guiding you right.


Yeah i reckon i made a breakthrough. It doesnt always hurt when i finger her, sometimes it will and sometimes it wont. I just think she is tensing too much. So i guess ill just make her orgasm again before i try another time.
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Georgia59

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Posted: 08-23-07 00:03am

If it is hurting her in the future, it is a good idea to pull back a little and play around a little more before you try to enter her again.

I'd buy some lube- it's cheap anywhere you can buy condoms and it seems like it would help the two of you.

I use it all the time because I naturally just don't get all that lubricated and when I don't use lubricant I get sore.
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jako18

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Posted: 08-23-07 09:40am

Georgia59 wrote:
If it is hurting her in the future, it is a good idea to pull back a little and play around a little more before you try to enter her again.

I'd buy some lube- it's cheap anywhere you can buy condoms and it seems like it would help the two of you.

I use it all the time because I naturally just don't get all that lubricated and when I don't use lubricant I get sore.


I have lube....but ive stopped using it coz she said it stings and its only a water based lube that you buy from a store next to the condoms.Dont know why it stings.
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