Single and Pregnant Forum - Single And Pregnany By Mistake

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Q: Single And Pregnany By Mistake

asked by: Nokio49 on August 17th, 2007

New User

Currently I am 10 weeks pregnant and single. I met my childs father when I was 16 and I've been in love with him since. When I first met him he had a child from a previous relationship we had been off and on till I was 19 and found myself pregnant. I decided to terminate the pregnancy which I live to regret until this day. Well 8 months after my abortion I found out he fathered a baby with a girl I went to high school with and I was totally crushed. We still saw each other on and off and had a few sexual encounters. Tired of being used and neglected I stoped seeing him for 6 months until June of this year where we had a sexual encounter and I ultimately got pregnant. After all we've been through I thought he would be there for me but now he saying he can't be a "FATHER" to my baby he can only help me somewhat financially because he's fathering his two other kids which I feel is totally wrong. I did not make this baby by myself and I feel I shouldn't have to raise it by myself he's a good father to his other two kids why not mine he says he loves me but he needs to get his life together. I think he needs to stop making babies and own up to his responsibilities I have to make sacrifices now he should do the same. I need help I don't know what to do

Replies(4)

benc152

replied on August 17th, 2007

Experienced User

ultimatly you just can't force somebody to be a parent if they don't want to be.
Having the baby wont help you get back with him, so you have to make sure that's not the reason you're deciding to keep it.

Either another abortion (which personally I'm against so wouldn't press that) or on you're own I'm afraid love.

next time safe sex. =\.

19yearold

replied on January 13th, 2009

Experienced User

you poor thing

you know what that is horrible to go though that. I understand that you want him in the baby life but he doesn't then he really don't care about you or the child. This happen to me but I didn't get pregnant. I took plan B and prayed I wasn't pregnant. He used me and had other girls pregnant. The whole nine yards. I was hurt deeply. But you have that baby and love it. Forget him, he only going to hurt you more if you keep him around. It's ashame how he treated you all those years, but now you need to focus on that baby and you don't need stress of him. But if you want him to have some part, then talk to him, tell him how you feel even if you have to yell at him. Make him listen to you. Good Luck. Remember God there with you and me. If you need any advice ask me. (and I know this is late but it wouldn't hurt to post something because other girls might read this and need a answer, so peace out.)

vainemion

replied on August 27th, 2009

New User

Abortion shouldn't be an option. If you get multiple abortions you can destroy your cervix and possibly get breast cancer or some other form of cancer. There are many other possibilities. Or if you get an abortion again and then you get pregnant again you have an even higher chance of messing up that child. It could come out deformed or just plain messed up emotionally and mentally.

Don't use the child to keep the father. If you do that it will either scare the father away more or he will be with you but treat you poor. You don't need that.

I don't see why you couldn't just wait until you were older and in a stable relationship, etc. first before having sex. Sex isn't love it's just sex. You were well aware of what could happen if you had sex. You should deal with the consequences. Take responsibility for what you have done. Even if you use protection it's not 100% safe and everyone should know that already.

Good luck and I hope you make the right choice.
I'm not trying to be harsh (sorry if I'm appearing that way) I'm just trying to be honest.

WhoKnows85

replied on November 1st, 2009

New User

vainemion:.. I am an RN, and abortion has absolutely no indications of causing any type of cancer. IF you suffer a secondary infection (that can occur with any surgery)that is left untreated, that can cause scar tissue which can then make it difficult for an embryo to implant. Please do not post medical advice if you are not a medical professional. Thanks.

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