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Emotional Abuse

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blueturtle

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Aug 2007
Posts: 1
Emotional Abuse
Posted: 08-17-07 01:30am

I just need to say this in words and try to lessen the emotions I have in my mind. I'm going through a lot of problems at home. I'm an adult and want to take that step out on my own, but my mom is constantly threatening to kill herself if I was ever to move out or even begin my own life. She is definitely overly dependent on me and all I feel is pressure from having to act the way she wants to or else she guilts me with her suicidal thoughts. I have asked her to seek help, but she refuses and no one else in my family thinks she needs it.

Because of her constant need to stay attached to me, I haven't been able to live my own life. All my friends have strayed from me and I no longer have anyone I can talk to. I'm at home most of the time because I worry about her and the child she is babysitting. I usually stay locked in my bedroom thinking of ways I can free myself from this chain and the only thoughts I get are thoughts of ending my life so I will be free. I don't have anyone I can talk to and everything is bottled inside of me. I spend most of my nights crying myself to sleep. In addition to these bad thoughts I have, I also worry about this child. Her parents do not think there is a problem, but I can see the emotional damage being inflicted upon her. She is being trained to be attached to my mom, as I was. I can't bring myself to betray my mom, but I worry about this child and myself.

I feel like I have a ball and chain attached to me for life. I've become completely withdrawn from life. Other than work, I literally stay home all the time. I can feel the life being sucked out of me. I don't know what to do. If I muster up the courage to leave my mom, I feel like she would kill herself. If I stay, I think a bottle of pills would be my new best friend. I don't know what to do.
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KingRett

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Aug 2007
Posts: 7
Location: New York, USA

Posted: 08-22-07 01:04am

Hey i just joined this thing 5 mins ago plus i am depressed and "semi-suicidal" as i call it. i'am a lilttle sleeply so i will try help but its going to be short. Acording to you if you try to live life and move out your mom will say she will kill herself. and if you still you might just do suicide. so pretty much what you do could make a suicide happen. if you do suicide your mother will do suicide as well becuase of her dependacy on you. iam sure noone would want a double suicide or deaths to happen so i dont think that will be a good idea. also if you still and move out she might do suicide becuase i have learned when people talk about suicide always take it serouis. so i think you and our mother should try to talk things out and go see a doctor and try to fix this problem abut you and your mother. yeah i know iam sort of babbing so i will end this now. this might not work but at least you have some sort of idea how to fix this. cya i hope this helps. good luck.
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