Well.....It depends on how long you have been together.

I personally, (25 years of marital bliss), have learned to walk alway when he decides he can not act like a mature adult and has to result to cussing and name calling.

As, when dealing with my senior mother. If you want to swear and get all puffy, than guess what? You just lost my attention! Good Bye!

My suggestion, put on a happy face, find something to make you think positive; cooking, cleaning, gardening, whatelver, but, ignore the negativity.

Don't let someone bring you down. We are all responsible for our own existence!

Great rid of him, im a bloke and i would never do that unless i was actually joking about.

I cant understand how some blokes are like that. Get rid darling. And start a new life. It canbe done and whenit does you will look back and think im so much happier.

Pardon my ignorance, but what is a bloke?

If the person with anger issues is related to you through blood, so your stuck with dealing with them for life? What then?

You chose the man, you can un choose him.

Leave him!! It's not worth the emotional pain. You will find a man who will treat you better.

SCREAM BACK???????? kinda works for me......I guess it depends on if you really love this guy and he loves you....if he has anger management issues and control issuses, he will NEVER change and things will always be this way. You have a choice to either live with him like this....cause we both know he AIN'T going for therapy....or move on. Yep, there are lots of BLOKES (guys) out there who appreciate a good woman. On the other hand, if you love him and can scream back, get all in his face.....knock yourself out..........its kinda like two little kids in a yelling match, but after a few minutes we both realize how damned stupid we've been and we're good! Feel free to PM if youd like!

Hi. I have been there. I put up with it for 5 years. I put on a happy face and apologized. I cried a lot and that seemed to make him happy and he would go away. If I tried to walk away he would follow me. If I didn't get mad back at him it made him madder. If I did, then of course that made him madder. He always said he wanted me to be as "pissed off" as he was. I eventually just started laughing at him, and guess what, that really made him mad. At times he would beat my dog (mine before marriage) for almost no reason at all.

Anyway, what I'm trying to get to is that I tried really hard to make it work. But he ended up in jail (just overnight) a few times, and we ended up in court twice. And that was after the divorce and it was very embarrassing for me. I wasn't raised that way. Even if you really love him, like I did, and want it to work, it will never change unless HE makes a GENUINE effort. There are classes now for abusive spouses. Not anger management. I have heard and read that those types of people end up using the things they learn in anger management to be more manipulative and controlling. I'm not sure how that works, but it was on a TV special on domestic abuse. Usually they wont go to therapy anyway. I hate to admit this, but I still have love for my ex-, and probably always will. He held the deepest, strongest hold on my heart that I have ever known. Even now that I am remarried to a wonderful man! But even before I was remarried, I was much better off without him and the pain he caused in my life. If you decide to get away, you will see.

Please know that verbal and emotional abuse is wrong! See if you can find someone to talk to in your area. Look in the phone directory for a help line or shelter if you need it. But, if you do, don't let him know. That would probably make things that much worse.

I don't know about you and your husband. But I am 5'3" and 110 lbs. and he was 6'5" and 285 lbs. It takes a lot of guts to stand up to a man like that. But it was all worth it in the end. And men like that should learn something from their mistakes. I just hope that my ex- doesn't find another prey. But I'm sure he will.

Take care of yourself. Talk to someone. If you already have and didn't get help, then talk to someone else. Don't let the situation get worse.

Sorry that I went on for so long! I am very passionate against domestic violence. And, yes, screaming, cursing, and name calling is domestic violence. Someone had to tell me that. I didn't know that it was wrong. And I am a nurse.

Take care of yourself! Do what you need to do to make things better for you. - T

Feel free to PM me if you would like. I will be happy to talk with you more about what you can do to make things right.

Im sorry but that is emotional and verbal abuse. That is not ok! Put your foot down and let him know how you feel. If he doesnt consider your feelings after that then he never will.

Maybe couples counseling would help?

Have you tried talking to him about how he treats you? Yes it is mental abuse and you are the one that needs to decide weather to take it or leave it. One of my relationships started off like that and then it went to physical abuse. You are to good for this, please don't take it as it can really get worse. Maybe you can yell back in his face just so he gets a taste of his own medicine. In the long run, it is your choice and you must do what you feel is the right thing to do. There are much better guys out there! I wish you all the luck!

I am still experiencing some residual brain washing and control issues from that marriage ...........how long are you going to wait?????????while your deciding you might want to read this book I found at my daughters THE FIVE LANGUAGES OF LOVE By Gary Chapman .........if leaving is not possible maybe there is a tool to fix it or make it easier ...good luck
wazzywoman /robin

I am in the same situation. It got to the point where it was just constant arguing because of it and I said something had to give I can't live like this. He offered counseling which I was just waiting for him to do and the counselor has advised him to go into anger management which he is willing to try out. I think that counseling would help as well as anger management. Good Luck