I think the excitement is part of it...

I don't think I could just orgasm if I kept masturbating or getting a handjob, the mental part has to be there too.

I wouldn't worry; some men just have to be in the right mood to orgasm. Other men orgasm even when they don't want to! It's called Premature Ejaculation.

When you do masturbate from masturbation, how do you do it? Tight grip? Dry, lubed? Lying on your stomach? Watching porn, fantasizing?

Also, how much do you use your BC muscles (the muscles you'd use to stop the flow of urine or squeeze out the last few drops) when you masturbate? Do you flex them to bring about orgasm?

i usually masterbate dry and fantasizing sortof. (i have a hard time fantasizing). I often use my pc muscles to bring about orgasm. i have done so since i was about 13 (i am now 19) and i think it has contributed to my premature ejaculation. i've been trying to relax them when masterbating. the pe is not so much about stimulation but more of just excitement. then the second time round when i'm not as excited i have a hard time achieving orgasm.

Ahh, so you're in a similar boat as me when it comes to trying to relax those muscles.

But now I see a different story. I see you don't have a problem achieving orgasm at all, you just have trouble getting a second orgasm or through means other than sex.

I personally do not often achieve orgasm through oral. Only one girl was able to do that. When masturbating I either have to use my BC muscles or I have to be quite aroused. Or use a toy that simulates sex well.

As for not being able to achieve orgasm even through sex a second time, that might just be an indicator of the length of your refractory period. It's the time after orgasm that it takes you to be able to become aroused, erected and be able to achieve orgasm again. If strong arousal causes your orgasm, and you're in a weak arousal refractory period it's gonna be harder.

How long do you wait before the second go?

You'd probably just have to wait longer or concentrate more on the things that arouse you as opposed to the physical stimulation.

I've had many times where I don't cum a second time (and others where it's another PE shot practically) and I don't mind as long as she's having fun and I'm having enough "fun" to stay erect.

i'm usually ready to go again within 5 minutes. would my overexcitability leading to quick coming the first time without much stimulation feeling suggest my pe is psychological. btw i've extensively read the "ultimate premature ejaculation thread" and found your comments very insightful.

If you mean to call extreme arousal psychologically causing PE, I'd say I think they're completely different things. What I mean is, I wouldn't call extreme arousal, a psychological issue.

When you're aroused your body changes. You heart beats faster, your skin flushes, you become erect, drugs are released, your body prepares for stimulation and copulation. Your arousal also affects your stimulation. A flaccid, non aroused penis when stimulated does not feel the same as if you had your erect penis stimulated while in a highly aroused state. I wouldn't call that psychological.

However, you might say your psychological mindset determines why one man becomes overly excited and another only becomes mildly excited. That I don't know. How much is nature (your dna, biology, chemicals in your body, etc.) and how much is caused by your thought and experiences.

Either way it sounds like your arousal level plays a large role in your ability to orgasm. And it sounds like your refractory period affects the level of arousal you reach and therefore the difficulty in reaching another orgasm.

PE is psychological in many ways. If you're stressed or feeling sexually inadequate it may play a role. Even if it is just to make you tense and unable to relax the muscles that trigger ejaculation. The book, Coping With Premature Ejaculation breaks down many causes, and if you're in a relationship it may be especially helpful.