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Post traumatic Stress Syndrome. cannot concentrate, Im angry

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Well... I think there may be something messed up going on inside me...I am planning on seeing a doctor...but its so tough to want to go and explain all of these things... basically Im going to try and explain my life in general.

I was always a good student, Im in college and a pre-med... good grades etc etc. I transferred 2000 miles away from home to attend a university that my grandparents wanted me to attend (they were paying for it). Well... within a week things went terribly wrong (i was transferring in as a junior):

I was physically attacked walking to my car... being a female it was the worst possible thing that could have happened... I was beaten up and my left pinky finger was dislocated and I had an open fracture. I was devastated as i play the violin as a stress reliever. My finger is now permanently disfigured, I even had surgery last december to try and fix it... my finger is crooked and i have not been able to play because of my bending and straightening problem.

Moving on. I ended up seeing a psychologist and they said I had Post traumatic Stress Syndrome... I was having problems sleeping, feeling fatigued all the time... and i would freak out (on the inside) whenever i would see things that would remind me of what happened. I began having problems in school.... I couldnt concentrate, I would sit there and try to listen and i would just zone out.

Now onto current problems. I worry about the smallest things now... and i feel pain in my chest almost constantly. My heart starts to pound and i just cant seem to stop myself from going into freakout mode. I try not to let anyone notice... I dont flip out on people at all.

I feel like i now have ADD.... il be sitting there and talking with my boyfriend and zoning out... i do it with most people that i talk to... and i dont like this. I dont want to live this way...i get aggravated so easily...and i try to hide it and it just ends up getting bigger and bigger... I used to have these weird twitches where I couldnt sleep at night...like there was just too much energy in my body.... it made me feel like i wanted to jerk around...almost like ants in my pants... i now seem to have it at least 4 times a week...and before it would happen maybe once in a few months... and not at night.

So.. I guess the question is... do you guys think there is anything that can help me...i thought that perhaps if i just tried to sort things out on my own id be fine...my psychologist wanted to put me on a low dose medication but i wasnt a big fan...now im not so certain going on one would be a bad idea.

Here are my symtoms:

-Heart racing... sometimes over the smallest of things (the dog begins playing with a ball and i dont like the noise...so i freak out).
-Anytime i get the least bit worked up i get chest pains... right now just typing this im getting this deep dull pain in my heart region...
- I cannot seem to concentrate... i used to be able to do it very easily...i totally zone out now.
- Im angry... im angry that i was attacked, im angry that im deformed for the rest of my life... im just angry.
-That feeling of ants in my pants.... a release of energy.
- I recently was training for a triathlon and got a sports hernia so im not allowed to workout other than physical therapy. (a sports hernia is where you rip your ab muscle from the pubic bone).
- The smallest of things get me upset.

I need to chill out... but i cant seem to do it by working on it alone...any suggestions?
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First Helper hurthawk
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replied August 9th, 2007
Experienced User
Re: Not Sure Exactly Whats Going On With Me...
hurthawk wrote:
Well... I think there may be something messed up going on inside me...I am planning on seeing a doctor...but its so tough to want to go and explain all of these things... basically Im going to try and explain my life in general.

I was always a good student, Im in college and a pre-med... good grades etc etc. I transferred 2000 miles away from home to attend a university that my grandparents wanted me to attend (they were paying for it). Well... within a week things went terribly wrong (i was transferring in as a junior):

I was physically attacked walking to my car... being a female it was the worst possible thing that could have happened... I was beaten up and my left pinky finger was dislocated and I had an open fracture. I was devastated as i play the violin as a stress reliever. My finger is now permanently disfigured, I even had surgery last december to try and fix it... my finger is crooked and i have not been able to play because of my bending and straightening problem.

Moving on. I ended up seeing a psychologist and they said I had Post traumatic Stress Syndrome... I was having problems sleeping, feeling fatigued all the time... and i would freak out (on the inside) whenever i would see things that would remind me of what happened. I began having problems in school.... I couldnt concentrate, I would sit there and try to listen and i would just zone out.

Now onto current problems. I worry about the smallest things now... and i feel pain in my chest almost constantly. My heart starts to pound and i just cant seem to stop myself from going into freakout mode. I try not to let anyone notice... I dont flip out on people at all.

I feel like i now have ADD.... il be sitting there and talking with my boyfriend and zoning out... i do it with most people that i talk to... and i dont like this. I dont want to live this way...i get aggravated so easily...and i try to hide it and it just ends up getting bigger and bigger... I used to have these weird twitches where I couldnt sleep at night...like there was just too much energy in my body.... it made me feel like i wanted to jerk around...almost like ants in my pants... i now seem to have it at least 4 times a week...and before it would happen maybe once in a few months... and not at night.

So.. I guess the question is... do you guys think there is anything that can help me...i thought that perhaps if i just tried to sort things out on my own id be fine...my psychologist wanted to put me on a low dose medication but i wasnt a big fan...now im not so certain going on one would be a bad idea.

Here are my symtoms:

-Heart racing... sometimes over the smallest of things (the dog begins playing with a ball and i dont like the noise...so i freak out).
-Anytime i get the least bit worked up i get chest pains... right now just typing this im getting this deep dull pain in my heart region...
- I cannot seem to concentrate... i used to be able to do it very easily...i totally zone out now.
- Im angry... im angry that i was attacked, im angry that im deformed for the rest of my life... im just angry.
-That feeling of ants in my pants.... a release of energy.
- I recently was training for a triathlon and got a sports hernia so im not allowed to workout other than physical therapy. (a sports hernia is where you rip your ab muscle from the pubic bone).
- The smallest of things get me upset.

I need to chill out... but i cant seem to do it by working on it alone...any suggestions?



HI Hurthawk, you are really anxious and no wonder! PTS is an anxiety disorder. You have been thru so much. Here's my opinion, for what it's worth: medication did wonders for my anxiety. I didn't want to try it at first either, I was determined to handle it myself, and it just got worse. I feel so much better on Cymbalta. If your anxiety is interfering with your life, I think it is a good thing to try some meds. I have almost no side effects, my doctor adjusted the dose twice to deal with the few side effects I did have, and now those are gone. (I have even lost a ton of weight on it, thats a great side effect!) I am calmer now, not "flat", just more rational about things. I don't get angry as easily.
You are young and have a life to live, anxiety is crippling you. I know some people don't like meds but for me they are just what I needed. I agree with your doc, just try it. And don't get discouraged at first, some of them take a few weeks to work. And if you do have bad side effects from one kind, they can switch you to another and it can make a huge difference. Crystal
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replied December 22nd, 2011
I have post traumatic stress syndrone because I had a horrible oral surgeon held me down no meds really. remember everything. also a bad sinus surgery they couldn't get me a sleep so they just paralyzed me I felt everything and heard everything. I have to live with that everyday. I am in therapy and my Doctor has given me Buspirone 10 mg. I take it every night right before bedtime. That seems to help with anxiety. And talking it out. This was in 2009. It still haunts me. Talk it out.
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