How Do I Help My Boyfriend With His Depression? Posted: 08-08-07 12:27pm
My boyfriend has been depressed for
months. He did take medication for a short
time but discontinued it in fear he would
become dependent. He admitted his
depression again recenlty but will not
take any action at this time. The
depression stems from a 14 year job he may
be fired from.
He has lashed out at me for even bringing
up certain topics, seems
less patient with his 7 & 9 year old
children, has asked if I am conversing
with other men and criticizes himself over
weight gain. I offer loving support with
kind words and hugs. Now he says I am
pushing my self on him and he wants time
to think about our relationship. I think
this is another way of him isolating
himself. What can I do to help with out
being over bearing? I want my boyfriend to
be happy and alive again.
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Mak52
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 Aug 2007 Posts: 6 Location: ,
My Opinon Posted: 08-12-07 07:24am
I'm not the smartest or the most
experienced person in the world...but i do
know whats its like to suffer from
depression. And in my experience i needed
someone to talk to...but not someone close
or not a professional because there is too
much tension there and you think that you
cant talk to that person about all this
because they will judge you. I found
somebody online that i could talk to and
now we are great friends and I can talk
about anything. I would recommend that he
should try talking to a complete stranger
about everything thats bothering him. It
really helps.
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caronephd
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 10 Aug 2007 Posts: 5 Location: Syracuse, NY USA
Posted: 08-13-07 22:38pm
Dear lu67: I think mak52 is on the right
track. The basic idea is that your
boyfriend needs someone to talk to who he
does not have an emotional connection with
at present. While talking to a randome
computer person can help, this is fraught
with risks since you don't know the
qualifications of the person you are
speaking to and you never know what such a
relationship can eventually lead to.
The best suggestion is to encourage him to
see a therapist for counseling. There is
mental health stigma around this so
reassure him you don't think he is crazy.
But genetly let him know the changes you
have noticed and how you think it would be
best if he found someone to talk to and
then start asking around for some names.
If he refuses to see a counselor, pick him
up a copy of the book "Feeling Good" by
Burns. All the best to you and keep us
posted.
