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Q: My Husband's Friends Are.....
asked by: carpenoctum on August 3rd, 2007
New User
Straight from hell. More so his friend's wives. My husband grew up with 4 close friends. We have been married now for 2 years and the friend's wives are not good people.
Ex: Last year we were out with the group, drinking, me and 2 other people stayed sober so we could drive everyone home. One of wifes we will call Lisa started hanging on my husband like a crutch. Both of them being intoxicated I let it go for a little bit until she poured beer on my husband and then proceeded to - use your imagination. I told my husband I wanted to leave. On the way home I told him that was totally unacceptable and I will not hang around people that disrespect the fact we are married.
My husband then called Lisa later in the week and explained I was angry, mind you without my consent, and without letting me know he called her. Lisa then contacts me saying some anonymous person contacted her saying I was mad. She apologized but now when we get together with everyone no one talks to me or they talk about us or me behind our backs (we get random people telling us about it all the time).
I told my husband I really don't like the way they treat us and he just lets it go so he can have drinking buddies. The wives don't let their men go out for just guys nights (bowling, dinner, etc) so we are always stuck hanging with them.
I don't know how to approach the situation anymore because he has already shown me that his friends mean more to him than I do. We do have other friends that we hang out with it's just these 4 friends.
Help!! Mad
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meblonde01
replied on August 3rd, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
Re: My Husband's Friends Are.....
carpenoctum wrote:
Straight from hell. More so his friend's wives. My husband grew up with 4 close friends. We have been married now for 2 years and the friend's wives are not good people.
Ex: Last year we were out with the group, drinking, me and 2 other people stayed sober so we could drive everyone home. One of wifes we will call Lisa started hanging on my husband like a crutch. Both of them being intoxicated I let it go for a little bit until she poured beer on my husband and then proceeded to - use your imagination. I told my husband I wanted to leave. On the way home I told him that was totally unacceptable and I will not hang around people that disrespect the fact we are married.
My husband then called Lisa later in the week and explained I was angry, mind you without my consent, and without letting me know he called her. Lisa then contacts me saying some anonymous person contacted her saying I was mad. She apologized but now when we get together with everyone no one talks to me or they talk about us or me behind our backs (we get random people telling us about it all the time).
I told my husband I really don't like the way they treat us and he just lets it go so he can have drinking buddies. The wives don't let their men go out for just guys nights (bowling, dinner, etc) so we are always stuck hanging with them.
I don't know how to approach the situation anymore because he has already shown me that his friends mean more to him than I do. We do have other friends that we hang out with it's just these 4 friends.
Help!! Mad


unfortunately you should come first, not his friends.. and you need to talk to him about that! Tell him in a nice way.. not Bi---- what you feel.
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Georgia59
replied on August 8th, 2007
Especially eHealthy
Maybe if you make an effort to find other people to have as drinking buddies you can wash them out of your life.

Replace them! That's what I'd do.
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Makoto
replied on August 9th, 2007
Experienced User
I am not sure of the situation. But what you did wrong was telling this girl straingt on that you did not like what happened. Not sure if your husband is a dog or not, but do not blame him for things your did not take action on.

He likes his friends, he needs friends. That does not mean they mean more to him than you. What kind of wife makes a husband change friends with out reason enough?

You should have confronted the girl. Nothing wrong with that. You man should have told her to back off as well though.
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sandyallen
replied on August 9th, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
Maybe what you should do is to tell him to go out with his friends and you can go with yours and when he gets ready to come home that you will pick him up. Some people can do some dumb things when they are drinking, especially when you are sober. Treat yourself to a fun night out with a good friend, like go shopping and buy yourself something nice like an outfit and maybe dinner and try to relax and laugh and have a good time and enjoy.
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Makoto
replied on August 9th, 2007
Experienced User
I am not sure of the situation. But what you did wrong was not telling this girl straingt out that you did not like what happened. Not sure if your husband is a dog or not, but do not blame him for things your did not take action on.

He likes his friends, he needs his friends. That does not mean they mean more to him than you. What kind of wife makes a husband change friends with out reason enough? You should not try to control him that much. However, if his friends are bad, and are encouraging him to do things that are harmful to your marriage, then of course he should not hang around such people. Real friends do not try to break up marriages.

You should have confronted the girl. Nothing wrong with that. Your man should have told her to back off as well though.
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