I struggled with anorexia while I was in college that got very, very severe, but eventually, I saw the light at the end of the tunnel and gave recovery a fighting chance. I have been recovered from my ED for over 5 years now without any relapses!

I got married almost 3 years ago, and we started trying for a baby this spring. I must have been pretty fertile because we conceived on my second cycle trying! I am 19 weeks pregnant, and my EDD is December 12.

I'm posting because even though my recovery has been solid up to this point, I still worry about the weight gain during pregnancy and losing weight afterwards. I do not want to fall back into ED patterns especially post-pregnancy and hopefully, I can lose my pregnancy weight gain with a sensible diet and exercise program.

I am also very worried about the post-partum period and post-partum depression. Since I have a history of depression, the unknown worries me. I have been off meds for depression since Nov. 2005 and actually have done better off them than I expected, but I'm terrified of the depression coming back. My sister had a baby 2 years ago, and she doesn't have problems with depression or anxiety but her post-partum period was so rough, she almost went on meds. If that can happen to a person who doesn't have a history of mental health issues, I worry about what can happen to me.

I'm a worrier, I guess!

So far, all is going well with my pregnancy. The baby has a nice strong heartbeat on Doppler, and I'm going for my big gender ultrasound on July 30. My mood has been pretty good lately, and I'm coping with the weight gain so far, but it's hard. I debate if I should ask about going to blind weights at the OB's office, but then again, not knowing my weight gain is frightening to me too, and I just don't know what to do!

I'm just wondering if anyone out there has been through pregnancy with or after an ED and how you coped with it (particularly the pregnancy weight gain/changing body aspect of pregnancy)?