Womens Chat Forum - Too nervous to receive oral in return.... any tips?

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Q: Too nervous to receive oral in return.... any tips?

asked by: JerkFish on April 1st, 2009

New User

My boyfriend and I have been dating over a year now. He is actually the first boyfriend I've had that I have been sexually active with. Meaning, yeah he is my first. We started experimenting sexually after a few months after dating and hit it off. So we have been having sex almost every time we see each other. But its been basically the same. I am not complaining cause I have never had any sexual experience before him so its fun to try new things. I love the look on his face when I please him. BUT, here is my problem. I preform oral sex on him a lot. I enjoy it, and he does too. But, I am some what afraid to get it in return. Every time he tries to go down on me, I squeeze my legs tighter and pull him back up to kiss me. I don't know why I am so nervous about it though.

I am not very proud of my body. I agree that I have a pretty face cause no one lets me hear other wise, but when it comes to my body..... no. I have been on diets, but I will always be a bit overweight. So that could be a reason, that my big thighs and stomach are in the way. Also I don't feel comfortable shaving either, I get irritated and, sorry but I don't want to look like a child. He told me from the start that he prefers when it is shave way back when we started going out, so I guess it always stuck with me. I do trim, so I don't think it looks bad. And he is a beast. Haha, not to be mean, but he is hairy from head to toe and I love it. So if hair doesn't bother me why should it bother him. So I told this to him, and he understands. You think I would feel better right? No, he still tries to go down on me knowing that I don't like shaving, and that proves to me that he loves me a lot, but still refuse.

Ladies, what was your first time like? Were you ever nervous? Any tips to prepare for it? Freshness, trimming? Should I really consider shaving to make him happy? What do you men really prefer?

I mean, I can't explain it. I can give him oral anytime, but nervous to get in in return. What should I do? Help?

Replies(17)

kimlaws

replied on April 1st, 2009

New User

I know what you mean

I went through a similar thing...but with me, it just kinda happened one day. We were messing around when I was in a skirt(I hadnt gotten to shave in a few days so I felt a little akward) and he just suddenly pulled my legs apart and went down on me...trust me, hun. I dont have that great of a body either. My boobs are a 34 and a 38 in D's. So theyre lopsided xD. My stomach isnt exactly flat and I have big thighs too with cellulite. I understand where youre coming from there. But honestly, if he truly loves you and even wants to have sex with you, that shows he could care less what your body type is. I found that out when my bf and I started doing this stuff. Its normal to be nervous about it.

But for me, Im nervous about giving HIM oral haha. Maybe you could give me tips on not being nervous about that xD

Have you ever actually shaved before? ITs not like all women shave off all of their hair down there. Some just shave part to make the area smaller. Id say maybe experiment with how you do it so that you find a way youre comfortable with it. If that means not shaving, oh well. Its you.
Its hard to tell what men prefer..so I couldnt tell you that...

Hope this helps =)

fml5

replied on April 2nd, 2009

New User

The First Times Always A Bit Weird

The first time a guy went down on me I was so nervous! I was very, I am very self conscious about that part of my body. Honestly obviously he truly cares about you cause most guys wouldn't even try if you weren't shaved and be happy you gave them a free pass not to give oral. So don't be nervous about it. You will be but just relax and let him do it, it's worth it.

JerkFish

replied on April 2nd, 2009

New User

I have tried shaving before, and like I said. I got irritated and again I dont want to look like a child. I know I need to face it sooner or later, he will keep trying. I will just have to think about you guys and just let it happen I guess. Thanks for your help.

Oh, and as for you Kimlaws, when I first gave head I was in a very uncomfortable position. Haha, I was in a hotel and my sister and best friend was on the bed right beside me dead asleep and another friend in the shower. Not very romantic uh? But he makes me feel undescribable so I did for a minute or two. Its the look on his face and the noise he made that made me feel confident on what I was doing was good. Haha. As for the whole cum in mouth thing. I always pull away before it happens. What should I do? Spit it out? Swallow? I am nervous about that too. Haha, I guess you can call me a baby. Again, this is the first boyfriend I had that I am sexual with. So I am still learning.

Thanks again for your help!

Rosie H

replied on April 2nd, 2009

Extremely eHealthy

I always keep myself fresh as much as I can. But seriously if he has had sex with you…he already has seen your good and he knows your smell. He may have even tasted you already. Men love the way “it” smells and tastes. Its in their genetics. Most men don’t mind the musky smell, they love it. So we are the only ones so concerned as to what it smells, looks and tastes like. As long as you don’t have an infection then he is not gonna have a problem.

Maybe you could try oral after a shower together. I know my 1st couple times were easy after a shower. I felt more sure of my own cleaniness. Cause I never felt sexy after a long sweaty day of work you know. This will ease your fears and allow you to understand how much you are missing. Girl oral sex is amazing and wonderful. It is a great form of foreplay. When you do do it keep your eyes closed and your mind calm. As soon as you think of OMG what do I look like…focus on what hes doing and what he looks like. I don’t know but seeing my thighs wrapped around my hubbies face is too good to put into words. Focus on how good you feel instead of how scared you are. Most of all realize that you are safe and that this man cares deeply for you and wouldn’t hurt you or judge you.

JerkFish

replied on April 2nd, 2009

New User

Thank you all for your help! And you too Rosie. Hahaha, with the information you have you should write a book! Lord knows I'll by it. Haha. I will try the shower thing. We never had a shower together, so this may be interesting. Wish me luck!

Users who thank JerkFish for this post: Rosie H

Rosie H

replied on April 2nd, 2009

Extremely eHealthy

oh yeah showers are great...he can get clean to...then you can explore him more...either way a shower together can only end in fun..lol

kimlaws

replied on April 2nd, 2009

New User

JerkFish wrote:

Oh, and as for you Kimlaws, when I first gave head I was in a very uncomfortable position. Haha, I was in a hotel and my sister and best friend was on the bed right beside me dead asleep and another friend in the shower. Not very romantic uh? But he makes me feel undescribable so I did for a minute or two. Its the look on his face and the noise he made that made me feel confident on what I was doing was good. Haha. As for the whole cum in mouth thing. I always pull away before it happens. What should I do? Spit it out? Swallow? I am nervous about that too. Haha, I guess you can call me a baby. Again, this is the first boyfriend I had that I am sexual with. So I am still learning.

Thanks again for your help!

Haha first time I did it I was in a funky position too..with his mom in the room next to us in broad daylight xD
Im still horribly nervous about doing it again. And I told him that if he cums in my mouth Im killing him lol. I cant stand the taste of salt...and I know that it can be horribly salty. *shudders*. Yuck.
It doesnt help that my gag reflex is really sensitive. I gag on almost anything. >.<
I wouldnt even know if Im doing good really, because my guy is kinda quiet unless its actually sex. Then he actually makes noises. Any other time hes quiet as can be haha.
I could understand why cumming in the mouth would make you nervous, though lol.

JerkFish

replied on April 2nd, 2009

New User

Its not the taste, I just don't do well with suprises. Haha. I think I would spit up on him by accident. And my boyfriend says I do a real good job even though sometimes I dont know what the hell I am doing. Haha, and my I ask how did you get away on doing that with his mom in the room....... in the middle of the day?! You should deserve a medal. Haha.

kimlaws

replied on April 2nd, 2009

New User

JerkFish wrote:

Well..she was in the room right next to us...with very thin walls.
Im still not sure how we did it either xD
Im still amused by it though haha

JerkFish

replied on April 2nd, 2009

New User

Haha, you guys are awesome! Thanks for your advice. Lets just see what happens.

haydenp

replied on April 2nd, 2009

New User

I need tips...

My boyfriend wants me to give him head, and I want to give it to him, but I don't really know what to do, does anoyone have any tips?

Rosie H

replied on April 3rd, 2009

Extremely eHealthy

I just did what I saw in porn. I know this isnt for everybody but thats what I did and my hubby was very happy.

Everytime I saw it in a porno I would study...lol. So this was about 5 years of studying…lol. On my 1st time I just did what I saw in the movies and what felt right at the time. My hubby later filled me in on what he did/didn’t like, cause we all know some porno’s are all show.

SnapperVag

replied on April 3rd, 2009

New User

JerkFish, you need to munch some Valium and have your box destroyed to no end.(orally speaking that is..)
You'll love it!!! Don't worry about the jungle you got goin' on, your bf will 'break on through', and you'll be discharging all over his face in no time! He'll love it, trust me.

babyd90

replied on April 3rd, 2009

New User

I know exactly how you feel! My boyfriend is the first guy that I have ever explored with. (Sexually that is.) He is the first guy I have ever given oral to and the first to ever give me oral. He is not my first as far as sex goes. I remember the first time we had sex, that was the first time we gave each other oral, and I WAS SO SCARED! This may sound a little weird, but I let him do it because he wanted to, and I just wanted to please him. I was a little hesitant about doing it for him, but I also knew it would please him. I love giving him oral because I love hearing the sounds he makes, and the way his body moves, and the way he touches me when I am going down on him. And believe it or not, the way it pleases me to hear him, and see the looks on his face when I am going down on him, it pleases him just as much to see the looks on my face, and hear the noises I make when he is going down on me. He loves it. He loves to be between my legs when I come. I don't let him come in my mouth or anything because I don't like it. But one thing I can tell you that has worked for me is communicate. Talk about what each other like and don't like as far as sex goes, and what each other don't like. It really works! I hope this helps.

haydenp

replied on April 5th, 2009

New User

thx yea it doesss,,

oliveoil1203

replied on April 6th, 2009

New User

him doing down on me and vice versa

well me and my boyfriend have been together for a year and a half now and i hate giving him head
1. he takes too long and makes my jaw hurt
2. I dont like him cumming in my mouth but its better there then in my hair (road head ugh! hate it)

Instead i do kiss it and carress it and rub idk what its called but where he was circumsized...he squarms like a fish lol
Then when i had enough ill just get on top of him and have sex incase he didn't cum and use your hand to jerk it off while your sucking it will help with gagging

Him going down on me..maybe someone can help me enjoy it more...
I am self consious not cause i dont like the way it looks or anything cause it kinda tickles and feels more like a tease and i just want him inside me idk its strange it feels good some of the time but idk
do you think maybe its just me and i dont really like it or idk
my bf loves to do it and im always trying to pull him up to me but he dont like that

any suggestions...

hope i gave a little insight for someone

JerkFish

replied on April 6th, 2009

New User

Respond for SnapperVag- Hahaha, I love your use in metaphors!

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