For me, I haven't really experienced that, unless I'm already angry with him about something and I get pissed that he thinks I'll have sex with him.

There are plenty of scenarios I could use but why do you ask?it may help me in answering your question a bit better.

I have to agree with ~*~Melissa~*~, need a littel more info.......I do agree also with Georgia59....why is it some men think SEX can fix everything? I could totally understand being turned off with your spouse, if in the past he had been verbally or mentally abusive as words hurt as much as a punch in the gut. Also, once spoken, you can not take those words back....so in time, it builds up and instead of feeling adoration towards that partner, you start to feel anger, sometimes even hatrid....and the "erotic" feeling no longer appears. You either feel obligated, numb or turned slap off. Now, if its not anyhting either of you have done or said....maybe you can try to remember what it was that turned you onto him in hte first place......Its still there, you just have to rekindle? It takes two to keep romance and erotic feelings alive!

There's no rough or kinky stuff going on. It just seems that my attention to her beauty and my comments about her wonderful physical assets (she is amazingly hot!) make her feel uncomfortable (to put it mildly). These comments are only between she and I - it's not like I would embarass her in public. I guess I'm just trying to get into the female psyche and figure it out....what I think would be a turn-on is repulsive to her....maybe we are as different as Venus & Mars.

sometimes, my boyfriend and i play a little rough... but it shouln't happen most of the time... we just do it, to add some spice and not to be too routinary and boring...

he is really hot! and it's a turn on for me to see and feel how hot he is for me...but when he gets really really way out of the line, im telling it to him, and he will cool down a little bit.

i think, she should be on the mood for anything different... because unless both of you have the urge to do something unusual, it wouldn't be succesful and one might find it not okay... i think you should communicate with her and you'll even get it, if she is on it, just with body language...

Too much physical attention can make her feel like she's just an object. Why not focus on her personality and mental assets for a while? Maybe she wants you to love her for being a PERSON, not a sex toy!

Thanks, Eiri...I'll give it a shot. I started to send her an email yesterday that ended "I love you, I want you, I can't wait to have you again." But after the exchange we had yesterday afternoon, I just trashed it - I know her response would not have been what I desired. Funny thing is....we've been married for more than 30 years....I'm still learning!

30 years... wow!

You could have just ended it with "I love you, can't wait to talk to you again!" Then it's not a focus on her body, but her mind.

I've been in that situation before, and I didn't like it because I felt like he was only talking to me/with me for my looks and not my personality. *that* may be a turn off to her.

Sorry if I copied anyone, I did't rea any of the further posts.

Sometimes.... well I know I do this...
When I have him at my finger tips. When he wants sex ALL THE TIME, I know I can have it whenever I want. So I don't need to WANT it, its just there for me at my liesure.
that plus
being together for a long time. Sometimes things get repetitive. Or ruetine. Which is boring and leaves you nothing to look forward too.
And when it seems he is only wanting sex, like there is nothing else he needs me for, I don't feel loved.

Add those together and I don't want sex.
Try not talking about sex AT ALL. Holding off will make her want it.
If she does something today that makes you smile, e-mail her and and leave her a comment about something she is good at that you adore about her. She will get it tomorrow and it'll make her feel really good!
Make her feel loved, beautiful (inside), and needed.
And next time you kiss her (let HER kiss YOU), do something different and a little special.