my husband has been an everday pot smoker
for the last 6 years. In the next year or
two we'd like to have a baby..thing is we
can't until he quits smoking..He's semi
succesfully tried two years ago for 6
mths..untill right before our wedding when
he reconnected with old friends. He's
spending a good $50 a week and not even
really aware of the financial burden its
taking on us. When we met three years ago
it was no problem because i did it
too..but I stopped because being a hyper
active person I felt lazy and didn't do
anything that i love anymore. well he
tried to quit again in December..but that
time it was because i had asked him to..by
the end of the month he was back to
smoking..mainly because we had talked and
he said he never wants to quit..he doesnt
see a problem with it. we're both 21 years
old but all he does at night is sit around
smoking a bowl playing video games. All
while im cooking, cleaning, doing the
laundry, taking care of the pets every
single night. I'm sick of it. I really
just wish that he would listen to me when
i tell him i hate it. Ive come to hate
pot. Its one thing if you smoke every once
in a while or when your not dependant on
it. but if he doesnt have it for one day
hes a complete a-hole to me. when he was
clean for that 6 months after the first
month things were fine and we did more
things! i know that trying to get someone
to stop an addiction is even harder when
they dont want to. how do i get him to see
that our marriage isn't going where i
thought it would be when i married him?
how do i get him to see that he needs to
quit for us and our future not just his?
shouldn't by now he realize that if he
gets randomly drug tested at work he will
be fired and its not worth it..or worse in
the long run he might lose me over it?
|
Fairy*Godmother
Supporter
Joined: 11 Oct 2003 Posts: 1329 Location: , Georgia USA
Thanks: 39
Thanked:41
Reality Check Posted: 04-16-08 08:24am
This is when you have to take matters into
your own hands. Unless he admits he has a
problem and is willing ot stop, your hands
are tied. You are STUCK in this situation
until YOU decide to get out of it. Maybe
this will make him understand you are
serious.....Can you not move out for a
bit, make him realize its you or weed? If
he chooses the weed, you have your
answer.....there are far too many other
guys out there who would choose you and a
family over this. I know for a fact many
guys who would never jeoporize theri
future over some random drug test.....HE
needs to get his priorities in
order.........and POT seems liek the most
important right now. Maybe he just puffs
away to escape from reality.......smack
him with a threat and carry it
out.....You'll soon find out your answer!
|
harmony1
Supporter
Joined: 18 May 2008 Posts: 259 Location: , Australia
Thanks: 15
Thanked:10
Posted: 05-21-08 06:27am
I agree with fairy*godmother. I'm in the
same boat as you at the moment and I know
how hard it is. It really s***s because
you feel like you're putting in more to
the relationship than him. He doesn't want
to do things with you. He's not
emotionally there for you. I used to do it
myself and like you I now hate it. I'm
hanging on by a thread in this
relationship probably as you are. I guess
the only thing you can do is threaten to
leave him and it might wake him up. My
partner just quit a couple of days ago. I
hope it's for good. Hope things work out
for you.
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