Medical Questions > Mental Health > Bipolar Relationships Forum

the bitter end of a bp relationship and a new life

For all that followed my sad story here I want to say a huge thank you for llistening and helping me. My BP relationship ended , could not survive the lies, the cheating, the indifference, the huge mood swings, the misery of not knowing if one week he is going to love me and care for me and next week he is going to hate me and say he never really loved me, he cannot love. Also, the jealousy he had, the accusations, the insane running offs and leaving me in the middle of the road,the hurtful words, th sex with other women, and so on.
Last time I spoke to him he said many swear words over the phone,he was beside himself, I thought enough is enough. No more.
I have to say im in a new NORMAL loving relationship with a man who adores me and treats me like a princess.He is so normal that I sometimes wonder when the freak is going to start, to realize that it is not going to start, we will be like that, laughing, going out, treating each other well. talking without him telling me off or going off in a diatribe of his own.
Im in love again and this time it feels so good.
It took me two years and a lot of help from this site to get over a relationship which was not going to work and to be open to a man who can love me and does that. A very stable man.

My thanks forever to all friends who helped me to get over John.
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replied October 12th, 2011
i just broke up with my bp this weekend. i hope my story has a happy ending like yours. thank you so much for sharing!
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replied April 7th, 2012
Experienced User
Just for you all to know how things can go, my ex boyfriend keeps phoning me and wanting me back, however I do not want it for me anymore and I do have a normal loving man now. I had to block him and tell him to disappear I dont know how many times, he does not understand that i do not want to have a life like that again, just last week asked me to try once more, I closed the phone on him and now blocked him for good.
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replied May 28th, 2012
I'm so pleased for you Reggiane, you have had some battles! I don't know if you remember much about my story last year but I finished with my BP partner 2 weeks ago, we have had NC since. He does not show all the signs of being Bipolar but does have some. He has been fine for the last few months but will not admit he has any problems/bipolar. I said I would stand by him but he has got to help himself. In the end I have had to walk away, it breaks my heart as it was not all bad and I miss him so much. I'm hoping mine will have a happy ending to
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replied May 29th, 2012
First off... Congratulations on your new life! Embrace it! Don't go back!

I have been apart (sort of...I still have to work with her) from my BP ex for nearly 10 months. Haven't met anyone, and not sure I want to. But that's a different story. Anyways... I have embraced being away from her. I don't get lied to, cheated on, accused of things I am not doing, etc... IT'S FANTASTIC! I've come to realize these folk live a sad, lonely life... sure, they can find a "partner" to take care of physical needs, but will they find someone who loves them despite their illness and will they stick with them... likely not.

We are not victims...we are survivors. And we got out with out sanity intact... KUDOS TO ALL THE SURVIVORS!

Keep in mind... the best part about your ex... they are someone else's problem now!

Good luck and be happy!
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Users who thank guest72145 for this post: n2kismet 

replied May 30th, 2012
Royalpayne.........that is a very positive message, I'm only 3 weeks down the line and struggling but reading things like your message help you carry on for another day
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Users who thank StellaA for this post: guest72145 

replied May 30th, 2012
Sometimes I think "we" need to think about this like AA- one day at a time. One good day of no phone calls, of actually being able to breathe and not think we're the bad guy in all of life is extremely powerful. One day turns into two days and it goes on. Eventually, we can know that we loved that person the best we knew how to, but we also need to take care of ourselves and know we are not the horrible person we've been told we are.

I love B with all of my heart and soul, I honestly thought I would grow old with him. But HE chose to not get help with his bipolar and therefore, made the choice to let US go. I can live with knowing I tried everything I know but he has to live with whatever is happening in his head every moment of the day.

And we can hope and pray those people get the help they desperately need, but it seems pretty rare that anyone sticks with it and can live happily in a loving, fulfilling relationship. It's sad, and I absolutely sympathize with them. But after this long, I'm taking care of me. It's hard to stick with it, but if you need to, think of the terrible times every time you think you want to "try one more time". Don't do it. Get on with your life.

A big hug and congratulations to those that walked away.
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