Medical Questions > Mental Health > Bipolar Relationships Forum

The bipolar persons perspective.. for all you out there wonderin (Page 1)

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Hello.. My names Meg. Screenname is due to the fact I am a equestrian, and now a college one. I see a lot of you asking how to deal with your bipolar significant others. I applaud you. I will tell you my story and explain.. and hopefully gain some help myself.

See.. for years I was in love with the man that just broke up with me as of sunday evening. All during high school, etc. At twenty two years of age, I decided to take my chance. For seven months things were awesome. I warned him about my bipolar and things.. As I am bipolar one, although I do get very bad mixed episodes with heavy depression, panic disorder and anxiety. We planned to have a family once we were ready as we are too young, get married etc... My doctors took me on my medications as they were not the correct ones; to cycle me out and to start new. I am actually seeing a new doctor this Thursday to get on track, which he knew about. So here I am.. not on meds..he knew the dangers. I warned him.

I start having episodes..and he tells me they are personal attacks on him. That he is not capable of comforting me after that. That alone, kills. When having a episode you need to be comforted. Not pushed away. Distance is the worst thing you can give someone whom is bipolar. Please take note of this. He told me today he can not be open with me now. His walls are up. Thats right. I was blamed. For those wondering, hes a narcissus I believe as.. unless its his feelings, he does not want to hear it concerning the situation.

So my advice to those who need help. Listen. Understand. Hear what we say. We are not making excuses by saying it is not our fault..we can not control it. Show us love and that you understand, and stick by us.. as well.. its what we are looking for. Because underneath all those episodes is generally a very insecure and scared person. Male or female. Im a mess to say the least.. the person I love most did what a lot of those diagnosed with bipolar fear. Being abandoned and left because of something you can not control, despite understanding the hurt you have caused..

Any questions or comments.. or advice feel free. As I plan to get myself back on track and on the correct meds..and I wont give up on him. He was my first and is my one and only, and I wont give up even if hes trying to shut the door for the time being.
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First Helper User Profile NJHunter
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Users who thank NJHunter for this post: Ninajune 

replied June 18th, 2012
My perspective about bipolar
Dear Meg,
You are highly delusional to think that any one has to put up with your bipolar. I was in a relationship with a bipolar woman that was truly emotionally abusive and left me scarred. For a healthy minded individual dealing with bipolar can be a nightmare. The lies, cheating, projection are unbelievable. Then when despression hits, OMG, the ignoring, retreating for weeks on end. It is all too much. I loved her but it was never enough. I tolerated more bs than I have from any one else. To use bipolar as an excuse for bad behavior and to think we should stick it out is unbelievebly selfish. I have heard many bipolar people say, love is unconditional. No. Love is conditional. When you treat someone terrible, manipulate them, lie to them, then ignore them all together, WE not only have the right to leave, but should leave. Bipolar people should only be with bipolar people. That way you can treat each other horribly, but hey, no problem, because you'll understand. Right?
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replied July 28th, 2012
You dont live in TX and were dating a chick named Jenn were you lol?
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replied May 30th, 2013
I think a law should be passed that bipolar people are only allowed to get involved with other bipolars. That way they can drive each other insane and leave us normal people the hell alone!
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replied October 19th, 2013
How absolutely disgusting your comments are. This is like saying:

There should be a separate forums for people like you to be with other people like you, then you can all post nasty comments to each other.

You have no feelings of love in the world.

I'm not bipolar but I was with someone for three years who had bipolar (She was the most loveliest person you could ever meet, she wouldn't harm a fly), and if your wondering I broke off the relationship and it was nothing to do with her bipolar.


'Leave us other normal people alone' Your not normal if you think like you just did.

Its a choice to date a person with bipolar not a forced choice, its up to you.
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replied December 9th, 2013
Unless you are educated in what you are speaking of, or unless you are perfect and have the right to make such blanket judgments, then you're just an uneducated judgmental idiot. i'm quite sure no one here cares to hear your worthless opinions. First of all, what do you mean by normal? Normal is nothing more than an illusion. What is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly. So because someone is not bipolar does definitely not constitute them as normal. Bipolar is a DISEASE and when the disease is properly medicated and the person with the disease has a solid support system, that person can do and be anything in the world including this illusive version of "normal". But, as with any incurable disease, there are going to be tough and trying times. As long as you're honest with your partner from the beginning and you both continually educate yourselves, then you can have a healthy relationship. It does take a strong person to play the support role, and I have told my husband what I need from a partner in order for me to be healthy and that it is his CHOICE whether or not to take on that responsibility and assume that role. And if the role is to much, I would understand and respect him for being honest and mature enough to walk away. If the bipolar person you are in a relationship is not taking the steps to be healthy, then it will be chaotic and hurtful and you should do the best thing for yourself. But please don't be so naive and say that "all" bipolar people are crazy or the all the same. That just makes you the ignorant one.
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replied November 28th, 2016
Amen to you, Doingmythang!!
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replied June 18th, 2012
Hi DMT. I liked your post. I agree 100%. Sorry for Meg, but she lives in lala land and doesn't realize how hurtful her actions are. She got blamed because she was to blame. The poor guy was probably getting beated down daily. I understand because it happened to me too. I commend her for trying to find the correct meds to deal with her problems, but she needs to stop pursuing a man that does not want her and her bad behavior. I am not being mean, even she wrote she has bad episodes and severe depression, anxiety. Gawd, give the guy a rest already.
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replied June 18th, 2012
Actually when you love someone you stick thru the good and bad. I never lied to him. Never ignored him when depressed or any of those things. I always give and give, but usually get nothing in return. I would have a episode and he would take it personal. So before being judgemental maybe look at yourselves.
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replied June 18th, 2012
Wow...
DMT and criedalot... I don't think you should put all bipolars in the same group and case, and I don't think any of us is equal, even if you don't have a mental problem.
I think is really sad to abandon somebody you love and care because of an illness... It's an illness and it controls whoever has it at times.
I also don't think a spouse, boyfriend, girlfriend, fiance, should take anything as personal. I heard a lot, A LOT, from my boyfriend and I try to ignore all that is said. Bipolars don't have control when they are having episodes and, after that, if they remember, they push everybody away because they are ashame of what they did. That already says a lot about how the illness controls them.
I know, personally, that it's not the easiest relationship, but I also know that they will be really grateful and loving to whoever sticks with them.
But it's not easy!
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replied August 27th, 2012
poppycock! They remember the episodes, they remember the manipulations, they even remember how many times they fool around unless they drank themselves silly.

One thing they remember to do for sure is to blame the disease. "Oh I cheated on you with 10 different people? Well look up bipolar, I can't control it." Yet the guy in the situation had better control his anger right? He better remember that there are laws against beating your cheating spouse because the 'normal' one can't blame it on a disease.

Look, people who live with and love a bipolar person put up with a lot. Sometimes they get depressed themselves because they are rejected for no reason while the bipolar one isn't rejecting anyone else. Their self esteem is in the toilet because bipolar people take out their issues on the poor chump that will deal with it.

Grateful to those who stick with them? Only when they come out of their 'manic phase' after taking any dignity and self worth you had left.
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replied July 17th, 2016
Oh where do I begin with this. First of all let me say this.

I have many friends were medicated and are bipolar and they're wonderful beautiful people but they are medicated correctly and they know that they have problems that need to be corrected. None of my friends ever will say they are not in control or responsible for the hurtful things they have done in the past they took responsibility for them. I have such great respect for them.

I love and adore man who I totally believe is bipolar is up in age at 61 and now he'll never get medication is also very successful businessman. But I have watched him tear apart people's lives for no given reason. I have watch him make decisions that are so unbelievable.

I've been with him nine years through the thick and thin of it. And I have to say I finally had to give up. He and I broke up a few years ago and almost literally destroyed me. I felt like I was thrown under the bus I'm a very strong woman. I had asked my doctor to put me on something becauseI felt like I was grieving because I have lost somebody that I love them I felt was my best friend. And it helped after 3 months I was able to not hysterically cry feeling like I was just carved up.

After we broke up he moved woman's house, in a few months he then decided that that wasn't what are he wanted, he manipulated her for her to move out. I watched him do this with his wife as well. And since I've been in this game for about nine years ,now I could really watch the signs of what was going to happen.. I can see all of them coming my way. Its the same game just a new person. It made me sad for him.

I made a conscious decision that for my health and health of my children that I really needed just put problemTo rest. Is a very hard decision. But nobody deserves to be abused manipulated for any reason, let alone blaming it on a condition or feeling you have the right to harm those who love and stick by you.


The fact is at any given moment, he would say stuff like 'are you just stupid why would I want to be with someone like you'. And the next moment do anything in the world for me.

I had understand that these outbursts we're totally uncontrollable. I get that. It doesn't mean that I have to take it. It doesn't mean that I need to stay there and take abuse whether it is unintentional are not. I love this person, I adore him, and I will keep all the really good things in my heart. Because the bad horrible and the ugly will only keep me grieving and bring me down.

And again and he will miss me because I was his best friend. He has money can buy anybody and can do anything he wants. But you can't buy good friendship and you can't tarnish beautiful memories.

And I will tell you this. The next man I get involved with I will make sure that he is not bipolar. Because seriously I have endured enough for a lifetime.

And if you've been with somebody who is bipolar and non medicated and just think so it's just my moods. Then you can see the writing on the wall and you'll see a consistent pattern to behavior it's almost like the lunar eclipse. So if you know it's coming and you decide to stay, and take the abuse have nobody to blame but yourself.

And I have allowed this person to manipulate me because of my goodness and I truly believe they know they're doing it. I truly believe it's intentional. But I also except that they have a condition. I also except that I believe all of the really kind things he did was in a loving manner. But I'm just not drinking the Kool-Aid anymore.
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replied August 5th, 2016
I don't think you are in LaLa land. People are online to project their own inadequacies on random individuals, and disrupt positive discussion aimed at helping not criticising the person with a problem.brush them off like the parasites they are.

I believe sticking with the partner thru hell and high water. But I'm married. If you aren't married, reEvaluate your real desire to be with a person Whoi s obvious in his rejection of you in your time of need. Do you really want to stay with that individual when he wont be your rock when you need him?
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replied June 22nd, 2017
Hi NJHunter,
I am very late in this particular conversation so I apologize if all has been said and done and it is closed. I just wanted to say I appreciate your article. I have only recently become involved with a wonderful woman who falls under the category Bipolar. At first it was a wonderful experience getting to know her, she was totally wondrous to be around, very open and compassionate; also she took the time to want to understand me as a person. I valued each and every moment with her. Of course the inevitable change of mood eventually crept and now I find myself wondering if she cares about me at all. At first she simply had a drastic change of mind about "us". I was told that her life is too messy for anyone new and even when I pointed out to her that I wanted to be a part of her life nonetheless she rebuffed my desires. She said it was unfair on me for her to keep me involved in her world. The next phase was a total explosion of anger. She was furious that I still wanted to be around, so much so that she belittled the very short time we shared together, terming it "whatever THAT was!" and going on to say that she will NEVER be like that again. She also managed to twist each and every word I said, as if I was blaming her for everything. Of course I am feeling upset about her decision to remove me from her life. She still insists that our lack of communication is better for us both and although she knows how awful she is being, it is still just "how it is". I care about her deeply and have spent a lot of time doing research on her particular illness. Out of the blue she reached out to me by text but no sooner had I replied by saying "I am here" then she vanished again. I haven't heard from her since that text. Apparently she has been ignoring phone calls and texts from her family as well. I do feel as though my hands are tied and of course I am totally confused, frustrated and depressed about what is happening. Just before finding your article I had sent her a text (she doesn't answer calls from anyone anymore) stating that I will never abandon her, that I will never turn my back on her and will be there for her completely. I don't know what else to do. I miss her terribly but she seems to be intent on being by herself now. She says that no one loves her which is not true of course. She is surrounded by people who care and love her so much, including me. Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that your article made me think perhaps I am doing something right in all this. I don't know how things will eventually turn out but all I know is I won't push her away.
I hope this message finds you happy and well.
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replied June 25th, 2012
My bipolar girlfriend broke up with me after a night out at the bar. She picked up her remaining belongings the next day and have barely heard from her. It was a complete shock that she left and came from out of the blue. She had been distant the last week or so up til then and easily irritated. I believe she is in a manic state right now - wouldn't surprise me if she is sleeping around, drinking or even doing drugs since she had in the past (when we weren't together)

Sorry NJ but I just don't agree with you. Maybe you do need comforting, but often times it's not with your boyfriend or the guy you just broke up with but with a complete stranger or someone you just met.
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replied August 2nd, 2012
Lost is a good name. Being bipolar does not mean you don't have control over what you say or do. You can use that as an excuse for lashing out, but it is just that, an excuse. As far as loving someone who is emotionally draining it is in the partners best interest to leave.
Seems to me bipolar people are afraid of the truth. Their behavior hurts everyone that has the misfortune to get in their path. What do you mean by not taking it personal? That is the dumbest thing I've ever heard. How more personal can it be? And why is it that it's okay for the bipolar person to walk away and ignore their partner, but not the healthy individual. You make about as much sense as the illness itself. Sorry hun, but exiting is the only answer.
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Users who thank TakenOutOn for this post: yeahitsme 

replied August 9th, 2012
Bipolar people see relationships in a very different light than you could ever possible understand. Yes you should walk away, it's what we are used to and why it is so hard for us to get close
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replied August 10th, 2012
What???
I'd like to know what you mean by the statement, "bipolar people see a relationship in a different light". Seems to me, they implode the relationship and expect their partners to take it. That doesn't seem quite fair now does it. Bipolar folks are very difficult to have a relationship with. I would have never done it had I known.
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replied September 5th, 2012
Wow i lot to take in the question is why do we love bipolar poeple more than sane people, i believe because when they are "normal" they show more love and affection, they love you hard and hurt you harder
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replied September 6th, 2012
positive thinking
Just because thinks are hard doesnt mean you give up. I agree physical abuse is a quick way to call it quits but if you are trying to get help a little support goes a long way! Does no one have anything positive to say?
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replied September 29th, 2012
Well, i have been with my bipolar bc for 12 yrs. He just got help with it 2 yrs ago, only cause i packed up me n the kids and moved out. Yes it was that bad, but not all the time. When he first got help things were great he was taking therapy serious as well as his pills. Than after a while i had to start reminding him, then he just quit all together. I work 2 jobs, attend school full-time and we have 2 children. He gets mad when i come home and spend time with kids or do homework, instead of dishes. He has cheated numerous times, my whole pregnancy. I have been emotionally abused. I have tried to understand, but when u have a person that needs treatment, and knows it but refuses, its time to walk away. My 6 yr old cries that all daddy does is scream n yell. My kids don't need the abuse either.
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replied May 23rd, 2013
Ignorance is bliss. Especially when someone is trying to seek correct treatment. If someone is refusing it..maybe get them the help they need. There is a thought. Or if you personally are too weak and selfish to realize it is a disease, the episodes are NOT remembered and things do happen out of control.. go learn about it instead of doing the easy thing and walking away. Anyone can walk away. It takes a real person to figure things out. Like the person I am with now who understands the disease completely and helps me thru it.
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replied May 30th, 2013
HOW DARE YOU ! You bipolar people have no idea how much damage you cause to other people. You lead us to think we are the ones going mad. I would advise anyone who is in a relationship with a bipolar and who is suffering to get out now! Dont wait and hope it will get better....IT WONT. Even if they are medicated and go for treatment...it does not help. They will use their illness to justify the terrible way they treat you. Just GET OUT!
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replied May 23rd, 2013
A few thoughts...i would be interested to see if people were so quick to judge the behaviour of someone with this illness if it were a physical illness that can be seen...have never seen such hurtful comments towards people whose behaviour is affected by chemo for instance. Second, yes it is awful at times to be the 'healthy one' but as someone with bp and who is with someone with bp i can honestly say its just as hard when you are the 'ill' one and u have no idea who u are or why u are behaving the way you do and on top of that live in a cycle of losing friends, apologising for behaviour u cant control, disappointing family and self, Struggle with work etc etc etc. third, it seems that a lot of individuals here who are the 'healthy ones' attribute blame when the 'ill one' has left them on the bipolar alone...lets remember that most of us with a proper diagnosis are taking meds and living with it, yes it forms a large part of us but it dowsnt define every decision we make. Sometimes someone with bp will break up with you because the relationship isnt working...as with any other couple.
I came to this forum for support and am sppalled at the number of nasty remarks being made against people with this condition, yes its hard for others and yes its hard for sufferers, but please dont use this space to air individual, nasty, stereotypical comments about your ex who is bp. If you are no longer dating someone with bp, why come on here and make out that any relationship with someone eith bp is doomed, when that is not the case?!
Rant over.
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replied May 30th, 2013
Nope...it doesnt work like that. Just because you are ill it doesnt not mean you can destroy other people. Stop whining about your illness and take responsibility for your behaviour!
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replied May 24th, 2013
To NJhunter and all of you. I m intrested in opinions from both sides. I had a great relationship with someone who told me that he was medicated for 2 years ago for depression and later told me he was diagnosed by cyclothymia-never said bipolar. Those 9 months we met he was unmedicated. Suddenly out of the blue disappeared...like he was dead...then he sent me a message that our relationship was over his powers cause it was very emotional and intense(though we had a long distance relationship,meeting a week per month and talking 2 hours a day on skype)...He never went online on skype since that,not on fb chat,nowhere...I tried to contact him several times with no response.I found out that he met someone else almost immediately after our break up...after 5 months he told me that this is true and he feels great with this new loose relationships he has. He said he has no feelings for her except liking each other. When I asked him how is this possible not to feel anything for her after 5 months he said that it is but I ll not understand. After this phone contact he disappeared again...no response on my texts etc...One day he answered. He was with her ,started insulting me in front of her and asked me why I call him and I don t leave him alone to continue his life?!I was shocked..It s been a month now and I didn t try to contact him again,he neithe. Though he posted on fb a video from a party he was with her and I get so abset cause he NEVER posts pics or videos of himself or nothing similar and when we had discussion about that in the past he told me he hates plp who do that.Was that in purpose?What is all this behaviour?Is that he simply didn t want me suddenly or is this a crisis?But 5 months is too much for a hypomanic or depressed episode. Isn t it?I don t know what to do. I miss him to death but I cannot accept he left me with no reason and meets this girl for 5 months now neither that he talked to me like that and was so cruel with me.Please help me,I d like to hear an opinion for those that deal with the disease and those that deal with plp with the disorder. Thank you so much.
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replied May 28th, 2013
To me it seems like a very very manic episode. They can last days, weeks, months etc. When your manic , its like your superman..well in your mind. He isn't thinking clear and needs medical attention. I know it hurts and is hard..believe me.
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replied May 29th, 2013
Love is conditional...you can't abuse the one you love
Robin_Jo,
Your rant was mean and hurtful to those of us that were DUMPED out of the blue by a bipolar ex. This disorder is very serious and destructive. Doing and saying mean things when in an "episode" does not excuse the behavior. And to the other person is terrifying. I tried my best, was kind, considerate and present only to be lied to and cheated on. I wanted so much for my relationship to work. I tried everything. After 4 yrs of being his faithful companion, he left me. So before you put all of us "normals" down, you should consider the pain we have endured by loving someone who is capable of such ugliness. Lastly, how come it is okay for someone with bipolar to abandon us, but we don't have the right to walk away when we are being treated badly?? But, on the other hand you expect us to take the abuse only for you to leave us. Yes indeed, bipolar is truly a selfish, evil disorder. You and NJ Hunter don't have a clue what this disorder does to the other person. You only see your side and have no understanding of what it is like to be abused by someone in an episode. It is very PERSONAL!
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replied May 30th, 2013
Could not agree more. Those of us delusional enough to get involved with these people, believe we can handle it but let me tell you ....eventually it gets too much and you are so hurt and damaged by these people that you feel you yourself belong in a loony bin instead of them Well done for getting out!
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replied May 30th, 2013
If you aren't strong enough and understanding, your right. You are delusional.
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replied June 1st, 2013
MsMaria

In no way at all was it my intention to be mean or hurtful to everyone who was dumped by someone with BP or put 'normals' (as you say) down. I would never put someone down who attempts to maintain a relationship where the partner is ill - I do however look less favourably on people who post abuse towards BP sufferers in general whilst demonstrating no understanding of the illness. As you say it is very personal, and one way in which it is personal is that all suffers have the condition manifest itself in different ways... not all of us will exhibit the mean, selfish, hurtful behaviour that is referred to in this thread - so it is difficult, as someone with BP to read so many posts that infer that we are all the same spiteful people...especially some of the particularly spiteful, mean words from some of the posters here.
All I meant was that in the same way non BP partners do not like being tarred with the same brush, BP sufferes don't. Also, that as I had come here for support and information, it was hard and surprising to read such generalised abusive posts about people with BP, which were not helpful for partners or sufferers.
I don't believe that my post infered that it was ok for BP suffers to abandon their partners but not the other way around as I believe that if it is too hard for someone to be the partner of a BP sufferer then absolutely they should leave, and without recrimination as it is a truly horrible, difficult thing to live with at times. I obviously don't speak for every BP sufferer but I for one do think it is ok to walk away from a relationship in which you are being hurt. I absolutely agree that this is a selfish disorder - my partner also has it and I have been on the receiving end of that behaviour - even though I should perhaps understand it more as a sufferer myself, it still cuts like a knife and breaks my heart.
Finally, I'm sorry that your relationship didn't work out, it certainly sounds like you gave it your all and showed support and understanding over a long period of time. I wish I could offer some great insight into BP behaviour, but all I can say is that in my experience and talking to fellow sufferers at group therapy and support groups, is that you honestly don't have any insight into what you're doing, when you're doing it. It's only when the episode is over that you may be able to reflect (if you remember your behaviour that is - I for one don't remember many specifics). I for one feel very ashamed when I am reminded of some of the things I have said to my fiance, and have thought about leaving him, in order that I don't hurt him again like that - my fiance has done and felt the exact same thing...obviously I don't know the details about your relationship but that is the reason some fellow sufferers have told me they have ended relationships...to stop hurting their partner, because they love them.
(oh and for the record I don't agree with even 1% of what NJHunter says!)
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replied June 1st, 2013
Then why are you on here?
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replied July 31st, 2013
i completely agree MsMaria for past month or two i've suffered alot and i have depression and suffer but no excise and i love my ex alot it just hurts seeing her with another person as if are relationship never happened she met new "friend" that live's in tamp and now after being together for almost year she wants be bestfriends and theirs alot i can't cope with and were in olrando and she's starting up with another person and cleanerly i feel like she's learned nothing from are relationship and i'm still confused she calms she wants be with me or unsure or just confused and lost believe me i know everyone feels i may not be the "normal" you know you do make alot points on it cuz some times they don't understand and it is very personal.
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replied May 29th, 2013
And you clearly do not see what its actually like for the person dealing with it, and who has it. All you see is what you feel, you want etc. And until you actually understand what its like, you won't get it. As the true ugliness is being ignorant to a disorder.
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replied May 31st, 2013
Nope...the true ugliness is how you people treat us normal guys !!!!
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replied June 1st, 2013
Normal guys? Your ignorance is deafening.
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replied May 29th, 2013
Hi!

You know! I did my best. Even if when I found out for the other girl I was kind and tried to have ahuman contact with him cause I wanted him In my life. I read night and day for bipolar and tried in a polite way tell him that I m there for him and maybe he has to go again to his doctor..The feedback I got was what I wrote on my previous text and even more. I lost 5 kg in less than two months,I couldn t work or focus ,couldn t sleep...I tried to explain this behaviour somehow but the only conclusion was that obviously suddenly he lost interest for me,forgot everything and moved on just like that cause he simply wanted to be with this new girlfriend..So I don t know if it s him doing that or if it s an episode.I still try to find an answer,not from him cause he show and told me clearly he wants me to leave him alone but from you guys.Please help.I don t think he will ever talk to me or miss me again in order to call me after 5 months...
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replied May 29th, 2013
Well you need to decide what's best for you. Does he see a therapist? Psychiatrist? You need to decide if its worth going after. As in the end it could go either way, positive or negatively for yourself. I know its hard. He could be in a manic episode if he's making random rash decisions like I said.
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replied May 29th, 2013
In the end you need to do what's right for you. As someone with this disease I've learned to seek help, speak regularly with my Dr and have outlets for my excess energy as I call it. Besides training, as I ride. I also walk and do kickboxing. You need a system if you want to be healthy and beat this disease so to speak. I also always put myself in the other persons shoes. I'm accountable for my actions, although sometimes yes I have episodes. I try my best to know my triggers. Someone not medicated however can not have control. Several months ago when I wrote this, I didn't have any control and I was devastated beyond belief. Now I'm in control of my life. If he isn't in control,he needs help. However he has to want it. Please do not hurt yourself emotionally though, or mentally if he is going to continue to hurt you as he has. It isn't fair to you.
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replied June 1st, 2013
If your weak minded and can't handle actually being sympathetic and understanding, your right. You don't belong being with someone who requires help. When its obvious just how selfish you are to understand some people need different things. It seems its all about you, you and well you. Sorry but not everyone agrees with that.
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