I'm a 16 year female and i think i may be
suffering from depression. I have been
quite unhappy for the past few years, but
i am the type of person that will always
wear a false smile. Sometimes I feel ok,
but then I can become a lot worse for a
few months. I have noticed a large change
in my behavior since september 2007. I do
not sleep properly (sometimes not at all);
i find it hard to get up in the morning
and as a result have started making
excuses not to go to school as i cant seem
to face the world. I have also started to
make excuses not to see my friends, which
i don't know why i do, only that i don't
have the energy and would prefer to stay
indoors. Also, i have noticed that my
speech has become difficult, I cant seem
to get my brain to connect with my mouth
and sentences sometimes come out very
slowly and disjointed. I have begun to
binge eat, which is something I have never
done before, but whilst I am doing so, i
think it makes me feel better. I don't
know what to do with these feelings or the
reasoning behind them and so for the past
few months I have begun to self harm.
It was all getting too much for me and as
I was missing so much school, I wanted to
help myself, but didn't know how. I
decided that I needed to tell my mum and
it took me a long time to pluck up the
courage to talk to her. I finally did, but
ended up crying a lot and she got
concerned anyway and booked a doctors
appointment for that day. We went to the
doctors appointment and my mum spoke for
me the entire time, saying she thought i
was stressed because of school work and
dance shows i was in. The doctor then
decided that was the issue and told me
that i needed to get into a routine to
make sure i didn't get stressed. With both
of them waiting for me to be ok with that
decision, I just agreed, but I know that
its something more than that because its
controlling me. After leaving the doctors,
I tried to talk to my mum about it again,
but she said she had done all she could
and shouted at me saying nothing was
really wrong and that I was attention
seeking. Now, if I'm crying she yells that
I'm being selfish and want to make
everyone else miserable, when I don't, I
just want someone to help me. To stop
myself crying, I've started to self harm a
lot more and don't want to, but I cant
find any other way to release how sad i
feel. I don't know what to do next, it
took so much courage to talk to my mum and
now we aren't talking, which has made me
worse, i don't think i could go through
that with someone else again.
|
Micky6901
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Apr 2008 Posts: 1
Hi Posted: 04-11-08 03:56am
I am 36, so i am probably close to your
moms age. I have a 14 year old daughter.
I'm sorry your mom will not listen to you.
I know that has to make you feel more
lonely. The truth is we as parents do not
always know what you need, emotionally.
Maybe you need to write her a letter and
tell her exactly how you have been feeling
and make a point to tell her that you feel
its serious and not just for attention. I
have had bouts of depression since I was
about 12 so I know how awful it is.
Sometimes we have to make ourselves do
things we really do not feel like doing,
like getting up getting dressed and going
out with friends. It could be that you
have a chemical imbalance maybe or
something else medically going on, who
knows. Maybe ask your mom to take you to
see a endocrine doctor. I know if your
hormones get all out of wack that it can
cause you to be depressed too, but I'm no
doctor, just a mom. The best thing to do
is to write that letter and try to get
your mom to get you some real medical
testing done. You should be having fun
with friends and enjoying life at 16. I
would give anything to be 16 just once
more. I know being a teenager is so hard,
probably much harder than it was when I
was 16. Has anything major happened in
your life that would cause you to have
these feelings such as a divorce or death
of a loved one or anything like that? I
know after my son had cancer and my sister
died at a young age, I had post traumatic
stress disorder, which simply means it
took a while for it to all catch up with
me at the same time, what most refer to as
a nervous break down I guess. Sometimes
things bother us and we don't even realize
it till we stop and try to think back. I
do hope your mom pays attention to you and
you get this issue straightened out soon
and get back to being the energetic social
16 year old you were meant to be.
|
pr3ttybrwn3y3z
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 08 Apr 2008 Posts: 5 Location: ST. Louis, MO
Depression Posted: 04-11-08 10:39am
Is it possible that your mom could arrange
a meeting foryou and your doctor ALONE? I
know that helped me tons. When I was alone
with my doctor, we really worked through
some things that it would have been
impossible to work through with her in the
room...Sometimes its hard to talk to those
whom u think should listen the most. Your
doctor should have requested for her to
leave to room for some one on one time, of
anything. Also, try, try, try to talk to
your mom about making REGULAR appts.
Things cannot and will not change in one
session, especially when your mother is
there. Also keep in mind that this may be
tough for your mom as well. She may want
to help you but she could just be scared
and not know how to handle this. Don't u
ever let her make you think this is your
fault, because it is in no way shape or
form, you fault. he only way u will get
better is to talk to a professional. Make
sure that when you do, tell him/hr
everything...every detail counts.
PS....My Dr. taught me a trick for when i
just NEED to hurt myself...Hold an ice
cube n your hand and squeeeeeze...it makes
it feel better..U can also put a semi
loose rubber band on your wrist and pop
yourselfwhen u get mad. Itz a great
harmfree way to relieve stress.
|
pr3ttybrwn3y3z
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 08 Apr 2008 Posts: 5 Location: ST. Louis, MO
Depression Posted: 04-11-08 10:44am
Is it possible that your mom could arrange
a meeting foryou and your doctor ALONE? I
know that helped me tons. When I was alone
with my doctor, we really worked through
some things that it would have been
impossible to work through with her in the
room...Sometimes its hard to talk to those
whom u think should listen the most. Your
doctor should have requested for her to
leave to room for some one on one time, of
anything. Also, try, try, try to talk to
your mom about making REGULAR appts.
Things cannot and will not change in one
session, especially when your mother is
there. Also keep in mind that this may be
tough for your mom as well. She may want
to help you but she could just be scared
and not know how to handle this. Don't u
ever let her make you think this is your
fault, because it is in no way shape or
form, you fault. he only way u will get
better is to talk to a professional. Make
sure that when you do, tell him/hr
everything...every detail counts.
PS....My Dr. taught me a trick for when i
just NEED to hurt myself...Hold an ice
cube n your hand and squeeeeeze...it makes
it feel better..U can also put a semi
loose rubber band on your wrist and pop
yourselfwhen u get mad. Itz a great
harmfree way to relieve stress.
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This page was last updated on June 11, 2008
